This 3,000W electric trike from China is a grandpa’s dream ride

When it comes to the Awesomely Weird Alibaba Electric Vehicle of the Week column, we don’t discriminate based on wheel number. We’ve covered plenty of two- and four-wheelers, but three-wheelers need some love too. As long as a product is weird and wild, and comes from the seemingly endless Alibaba shopping catalog, it has a chance of earning this coveted weekly title. And that’s just what this awesome little electric trike has achieved today.

A hardcore electric trike

Keep in mind that this ain’t your son’s cute little tricycle. In fact, it’s more like your dad’s Rascal… er… trike, especially if your dad has a gray ponytail just begging to once again flap in the wind against the back of his leather vest.

Sure, this is a far cry from a true Harley product, but you can at least feel some spiritual influence. You know, like a distant cousin. An adopted one. Twice removed.

That small amount of influence runs mostly skin deep, though. The stitched (p)leather saddle, the aggressive rake angle of the fork, and those beefy tires all speak to the aggressive-looking design of this e-trike. It’s just missing leather bar tassels, hooker headers, and a black compliance half-helmet for the complete effect.

The 3,000W motor isn’t a powerhouse at just 4 horsepower if we’re talking about Harleys, but compared to “street legal” trikes from Lectric, Rad, and others, it is about two to four times as powerful. That power doesn’t translate into top speed because of the inefficiencies of huge wheels and the lack of even the pretense of pedaling, so expect just 50 km/h (31 mph) – which reminds us that the ride is about turning heads, not speedometer needles. Speaking of turning heads, you won’t want to be going anywhere near top speed on a turn since these trikes tip easily. Let your inheritance come in due time!

There are even a few nice accents here and there, such as the big, easy-to-read LED display, the large front headlight, the dual coilover shocks for rear suspension (complete with separate hydraulic reservoirs), and included mirrors mounted to the hydraulic disc brake hand lever assemblies.

A rear cargo basket seems to provide ample room for a set of bocce balls, an oxygen tank, or a pile of spare Mahjong tiles – maybe even all three if you Tetris them all in just right. Your ancestor will be the talk of the nursing home, blowing by Rascals like George Costanza.

A closer inspection even reveals a locking storage compartment! Or maybe that’s the battery compartment? Either way, it’s a great place to stash the black market Viagra. I’ll be honest, the literature is a bit lacking on this one. I’ve had to go out on a limb looking for details.

But perhaps the low price will assuage any swirling concerns you may have of losing your inheritance. Priced at $589, this e-trike is practically just a few cashed Social Security checks away! Well, that’s before the untold thousands of dollars you’d have to spend in importing and shipping charges to get one sent halfway around the world.

And then there’s the legal issue of determining whether you’d even be able to import one for street use. Though if you’re planning on sticking to the confines of the Del Boca Vista community center, perhaps street legality is a moot point. The Alibaba description includes a VIN and motor number, so you might even be able to roll the dice at the DMV.

Me? I think I’ll save the electric trike for a few more decades. But when it comes time to relive my youth, you better believe China is going to hear me come a-knocking!

Please don’t try this at home

OK, we’ve had our fun with a few jabs at some of Alibaba’s finest e-trike engineering…and our beloved elders. But please don’t take this as a recommendation to spend your fixed income on a set of wheels from halfway around the world.

As we’ve seen time and time again, importing vehicles from Alibaba is a complicated, timely and sometimes costly endeavor. Jumping into a project like this orthotics-first is not for the faint of heart. It’s probably a better idea to just enjoy window shopping instead of being foolish like me and actually sending your hard-earned money off to whatever factory seems to catch your eye that week. If anything, a few Amazon sellers have done some of the legwork for you and are offering similar items at much higher prices.

But, hey, you’ve been warned. And if you still go through with it, be sure to tell me what happens!