Comments

1. Adam Cole (2018-08-06) #

   This is the first blog post of yours I've ever read that felt more like a journal entry to yourself, not polished, not even meant for us. Useful in a different way. It's fascinating.
   
   Good luck with stuck.

2. Heather (2018-08-06) #

   So relevant to everybody and anybody.. for just about anything. Thank you!

3. Leonard Choo (2018-08-06) #

   This is amazing. This is exactly how I learned Japanese and how to use Illustrator and design tools real quickly! This is also how I am learning programming these days.
   
   I feel like once you start contributing and be useful to others, confidence naturally comes to you. This is how I learned Japanese and design in fact!
   
   I first started learning Japanese when I was 20. I joined a Toastmasters club (public speaking club)where members do speeches in Japanese and English. But the club was more than jus giving a speech. It had to be managed like any other club. It involved organizing club contests, parties, and most importantly communicating with members who could speak only Japanese (including people from Japan!).
   
   Every week and month, I was focused on helping out this community I love. I did whatever I did to get things done. If I had to pick up new Japanese vocabs or if I had to write a long paragraph in Japanese, I simply learned how to do it. It was no longer about where I can or not, and thus, it was never a matter of my confidence! Naturally, I became highly fluent in less than two years.
   
   At the same time, I picked up many valuable skills such as Adobe Illustrator while making club banners, business cards and managing people and money in an organization. Contributing and learning at the same time really did help me get to the level that I want, without worrying too much about where I can make it or not.
   
   This article really made me sum up past few years of my life. This article actually gave me more confidence and reason to start my own blog and YouTube to start sharing what I've learned and what I want to learn!
   
   Thanks for sharing and keep being awesome!
   
   Cheers,
   Leonard

4. Khoi (2018-08-06) #

   Thanks for sharing this snippet with us, Derek. You're absolutely right. When you're passionate about a craft, you share what you know with the world without need or anticipation of recognition. It's all about providing value to people and trying to leave a mark or change the world for the better in someway. Keep creating and I can't wait to read your next book.
   
   Cheers,
   Khoi

5. Khoi (2018-08-06) #

   And I also love the part about implementing what you've learned immediately because we often forget 99% of the things we consume anyway and so it's best to create while things are fresh in our mind. That's how we actually learn something and make sure it sticks.

6. Tab Bartling (2018-08-06) #

   You are right, it is not about you. Also, it does not have to be a masterpiece. And yes, all you have to do is contribute. However, it doe have to come from your heart and soul. People need to believe when they read or listen to what you have to say.
   
   Counter melodies are like call and response in music. It needs to engage and communicate. And sometimes, less is better as we want to communicate effectively. We need to say something we feel and respond to the other person's ideas.
   
   Ideas develop over time with experiences. Just keep engaging with people who you feel inspire the best in you and hopefully you inspire the best in them. Relationships are like experiences and important for developing your art. Believe in your own concept of what works for you. Keep growing and learning!

7. Craig Latimer (2018-08-06) #

   Very insightful! Can’t wait to read the new book when it comes out

8. Allison Gilliam (2018-08-06) #

   You are so right! I spent way too much time thinking people would think my latest song wasn't well crafted, while in truth, I was on the way to a better song. Maybe not one Nashville wanted, but spoke to people in my world! I certainly get what you're saying! Thanks!

9. Charley (2018-08-06) #

   You hit home...and a home run...!!
   
   Thanks,

10. Tom (2018-08-06) #

    Contribution without the need for perfection is the way. If the vector is pointing in the right direction, good will come from what you are doing.

11. Ben Bowen (2018-08-06) #

    Thanks for your openness. I like "unique and useful" as good place to start. But I think with that comes the opportunity to innovate and grow (based on new market circumstances) which are of course key for continued profitability, even when it's uncomfortable.

12. Niruja S (2018-08-06) #

    I'm wondering whether your last sentence speaks to your confidence in your contributions - classifying your contribution as "useful" is saying something? When I read the post, it feels a little conflicted because I believe you've let go of the confident feeling that you know everything, but it also takes a lot of confidence in yourself (on a personal level) to not require the external validation you mention.

13. Leor Grebler (2018-08-06) #

    Love it and thanks for putting out your work and thoughts! They've provided wonderful motivation for me to get through tough times!

14. Pam Stucky (2018-08-06) #

    The work is the point: that's exactly it. There's one beginning, and one end. Everything else is the messy glorious middle. We get far too caught up in the final product and outcome, but the work is the whole point!! Great post, Derek!

15. clarke ching (2018-08-06) #

    I think I "peaked earlier" than most, wrt confidence, Derek. I got it all beaten out of me in my late-twenties and early thirties. It took almost twenty years to get over that and now, as I approach 50, I feel finally feel like my confidence has caught up with my capacity.
    
    Very thought provoking.
    
    Maybe what you describe is wisdom?

16. Martin (2018-08-06) #

    Wonderful! Welcome to the Stoic life ;)

17. Thomas Capone (2018-08-06) #

    Excellent. And I want to promote this to the 5M+ members of the NYDLA.org
    
    I love your body of work.

18. Carey Giudici (2018-08-06) #

    Greetings from Guadalajara... Excellent advice. You might want to mention how debilitating it is to become addicted to quick praise and superficial validation. We begin to imagine we can stop trying to contribute. American students are number hopeless in the world academically, but number one in confidence as a result of this addiction.

19. Sanjay Nasta (2018-08-06) #

    Love this framework Derek. Coming from the training world, I already knew that you have to do quickly after you learn otherwise you forget (some dude named Ebbinghaus did research on this in the 19th century). In fact you have to do, and keep relearning (spaced learning) or it goes away. However, I love the additional step of contributing. It makes it meaningful and frankly likely gives us motivation to keep learning.

20. Beverley Tang (2018-08-06) #

    I agree that what's important is that we can help other people. I've failed a lot in life but I realised God was allowing this to make me humble and ultimately a nicer person to be around. Now I've let go of trying to be a big success but just focus on being able to help even just a hand full of people. It takes the pressure off too.
    
    All the best.

21. Rex (2018-08-06) #

    Thank you for sharing this and it resonates with me. I'm at a point in my life where I am stuck and seeing the need to create, share and contribute. The confidence to contribute where you are at and knowing there are others that will receive it happily is not always the easiest place to reach.

22. Ben (2018-08-06) #

    I'm not sure I agree with the statement that learning without doing is pointless. I think the point of learning is to gain insight and understand into something on a deeper level. If it's not shared, the learning itself may contribute to something that is eventually shared. In my opinion true learning comes from a thirst for wanting to know and understand something, and doesn't necessarily have the intent to share built into it. Without a doubt, if something is never shared then the learning may be a waste, but I'm not sure that I need to share something in order to consider the learning valuable. That's my feedback.

23. Tommaso Mastrocola (2018-08-06) #

    Derek it takes bravery to put in print these words. I have been full of bravado early in my career and with that bravado came immense insecurity and a total lack of self awareness.
    At 46 I am just beginning to "get it" and you hit the nail on the head- we cannot become lifetime scared students...NO we need to do our Work. We need to develop the ability to learn then go test, to fall and get up, to see that its never about getting them all its about doing something that is wanted or needed. You seriously understate the immense value and inspiration you provide- that you provided me personally- your work matters

24. Wade (2018-08-06) #

    Just wanted to say keep up the great work. It’s freeing to do work for an audience of one and let the bi-product be what the bi-product will be. Thanks for sharing.

25. Rachel Walker (2018-08-06) #

    Less of self filled with Spirit; a life full and complete. ☺
    Great to hear from you Derek!
    Rachel☺

26. Marjorie Millner (2018-08-06) #

    I think you don't give yourself enough credit for your first amazing entrepreneurial success. Perhaps in hindsight you can see where things might have gone wrong if the fates had not been with you, but you obviously did a lot right, and worked very hard, and helped a lot of musicians along the way. It is, however, a breath of cool fresh air (on what is a rather broiling day in the Pacific NW USA) for me to hear you acknowledge that you are only human and that you feel like you were, in some part, the beneficiary of luck the first time around, and are now suffering the doubts that come with trying to surpass oneself and with gaining additional experience in the world. You are inspiring me to get back to the piano and write something (I haven't composed anything in almost a year.) My recent efforts have all fizzled, but I have given up my efforts quickly, feeling stupid and that previous writings were obviously just lucky. I think I need to try harder. All my experience should not go for nought! Thank you for another timely blog entry!

27. George Kao (2018-08-06) #

    If there's anything to try, it's to be useful, yes... but you don't have to "try" to be Unique. Just commit to showing up, being yourself, and you can't help but be unique.

28. LeeJTyler (2018-08-06) #

    I love this so much, Derek! I’m ripping away my perfectionism because I realize just how little time people spend thinking about me. Even those who I know love me very, very much.
    And for those who want to be in service to others, no matter what that looks like, it’s important that we share our hard-learned lessons, both at university and in life as well as the ones we are learning now. Not because we’re “brilliant” but we just might have that one sentence that helps a person’s life improve a little bit more.

29. Pawan (2018-08-06) #

    Hi Derek,
    
    I think you have painted a good picture but it can be improved by adding more colours to it.
    
    What I mean is, I think giving an example here would help readers co-relate.
    
    Also, I agree with one of the comments that article is draft and needs further
    polish.
    
    Cheers
    
    Pawan

30. Forest Sun (2018-08-06) #

    Thank you for this one, Derek. Glad to be in the orchestra with you.

31. Stephanie (2018-08-06) #

    I like that word "dumblucky". Most of us with a lot of luck grow to be arrogant and hard of hearing from the observers around us.
    
    And I like your metaphor of not using what you learn into action akin to throwing good food into the trash.
    
    Thank you for this self reflective, if somewhat also a rather critical, piece.
    It's good to ask and evaluate the activities you have been doing. But a few excellent quality work turn up in the midst of many, many average/mediocre ones. The point is to keep going.

32. Melany Perkins (2018-08-06) #

    I agree that we all have something to contribute. I think keeping it simple makes it smooth. That’s why I love working with kids. They’re fresh and in the moment.

33. Joni (2018-08-06) #

    I don’t think it’s as much about intelligence as it is about being in the flow of things. Letting things grow and evolve organically. Picking off the collective consciousness you surround yourself with. You can’t isolate yourself and feel intelligent. It’s a group process.

34. SARMA! (2018-08-06) #

    Hello Derek. :)
    This is so inspiring. I'll look forward to the final book.
    All i could think to tweak is that the very last sentence... the word "just" feels inadequate somehow. Or... demeaning to the unique and useful work. Maybe the word "simply" instead ... it doesn't hint at some kind of inadequacy as the word "just" does. I think?
    OR, leave the word out, and follow with one more sentence or part of a sentence. Now I aim to make my work - my contribution to the world - unique and useful. With that goal I'm happy with the product regardless of its ultimate popularity or profitability. [or... something].
    
    Anyway.. that's my small contribution to this inspiring essay. :) Take it or leave it.
    Now I need to hurry up and finish my own book!
    I hope you're well!! I envy your life in a different country. Things are cuckoo in this one these days. XOXO

35. harvey sid fisher (2018-08-06) #

    Derek,
    There's an old jewish saying:
    'Once you have to talk about it, it's a half a lie already'.
    HARVEY SID FISHER

36. Sigrid Chu (2018-08-06) #

    Hello Derek,
    
    Thank you for sharing.
    
    These are some of the questions that came to me after I read this chapter:
    
    1. Is it true then that ignorance is bliss?
    
    2. Is it better to not know so much, to just trust our instincts and use our natural courage to pursue our ideas and dreams?
    
    3. How can we better use the knowledge that we eventually gain to give us the confidence to continue moving forward?
    
    Question #3 is the most important I think. With growth and experience come knowledge. But with knowledge, comes the realization that what we believe in is not always what is true, useful, or even right.
    
    Best,
    
    Sigrid

37. Julia Powell (2018-08-06) #

    I just realized what an incredible rabbit hole You've sent me on since I found your site. This post hit right at the right time on the mental trip and fall I've been on in the last six months. This morning I wrote the word "confidence" but knew that wasn't what I was feeling - I am feeling RELAXED. The line that just connected to what I have arrived at was "It doesn't matter if it's a masterpiece or not, as long as I enjoy it" There - there was the thing I was trying to describe to myself this morning. I realized this morning that the work I have been calling my "day job" (Stuff I just do for money, not to be taken seriously) IS the work I REALLY want to do! The stuff I've been throwing all my effort into (because it's more "serious") is actually the "day job". You nailed what just hit me today - and how I've suddenly RELAXED about ALL of it! The possible difficulties that lay ahead of me don't matter anymore - I have already survived some pretty hard stuff. I KNOW what makes me unique - I just never valued it until now. I know this is a bit disjointed but it was an immense realization. Thanks for your writing - you really started a deep change in my thinking that has gotten me to a wonderful new place.

38. Darren Ellis (2018-08-06) #

    Love it Derek!
    
    I've experienced a similar thing, starting the first CrossFit gym in New Zealand and thus being able to take advantage of the upsurge in popularity of this style of training, despite making mistake upon mistake as a business owner!!
    
    Now that there are 130 CF gyms in the country, and that I have opportunities to create new products and businesses, I am faced with the fact, that this time, I will have to persuade people that they need what I have, versus them simply coming to me because they want what I have.
    
    The knowledge that what I am creating is unique and useful is what will keep me going through the tough days.

39. james (2018-08-06) #

    Bravo.
    Funny how the more you learn the more you realise how little you know.
    But, what you do with that knowing is what counts.
    And, from a purely selfish perspective, I am glad you are sharing for, I personally, derive much pleasure and insight in reading your views and idea.
    Thank you.

40. Mike Busch (2018-08-06) #

    I am happy you found your way! This a great post.

41. Tom Stein (2018-08-06) #

    I've only been wrong once in my life, and that was when I thought I was wrong but I was actually right. (Joking)
    
    It's like that moment when you are on stage and about to hit the bridge of a song, you know it is coming, but then your brain farts out for a millisecond and you second guess yourself on it. No, it's another verse....D'OH! It was the damn bridge and I faltered going into it, dang!
    
    I remember when my goal used to be to play an entire song without making an error (or write an entire arrangement with no mistakes in it). Then it was to play a whole set with no mistakes, then to play the whole night with just one or two mistakes.
    
    Now I feel pretty good if I can just get up on the stage unassisted.

42. Dave (2018-08-06) #

    Interesting when you get to that point in life when you realise the greatest joy is giving and offering something useful to help others.
    
    Then you have to look hard at yourself, beyond all stories you tell yourself and find out what that actual value is. That is a turbulent exercise to undertake.
    
    Thanks for gifts, Derek.

43. Michael deVry (2018-08-06) #

    Derek,
    
    Really enjoyed this piece in it's ability to communicate insights in a very clear and concise way. I got the sense you are reflecting on the role of ego. The ego will lead you to place your personal fulfillment above all else. As you have already pointed out this quest starts with placing your focus on others' well-being.

44. Tom Stein (2018-08-06) #

    Also made me think about the Dunning-Krueger Effect.

45. April Bell (2018-08-06) #

    "If I can do something that people find useful, then I should. It doesn’t matter if it’s a masterpiece or not, as long as I enjoy it." Amen to that. I do believe that being a contribution (using our own unique gifts) is the seat of human happiness. Right on time, thanks for this!!

46. Nneka Edwards (2018-08-06) #

    Hi Derek,
    
    Interesting thoughts and I appreciate you making yourself vulnerable by being so honest.
    
    The fact that you questioned your intelligence so many times, though, suggests that you may be a wee bit too hard on yourself (am I wrong? what do you think?). I don't believe that the kind of success that you enjoyed was entirely "dumb-lucky." I am quite convinced that you actually did a lot of things right ... and maybe better than most ... or else, you would not have stood out as you ended up doing. Success is not usually an arbitrary thing and I doubt that it was in your case.
    
    Personally I just think that it's a natural process (if you live life as it should be lived) that you will always be learning and therefore always growing, and also (hopefully) growing wiser. It doesn't necessarily mean that your younger self was "stupid" - just maybe less experienced, but still right where you were supposed to be for that stage of your life. And now maybe you're right where you're supposed to be for this stage of your life. It would be very weird to see a baby pop out of the womb already walking and running. We expect them to totter and fall a couple of times but eventually they're walking. A baby that totters is brave enough to explore their world ... and that's what you were doing in your earlier professional life I would like to think.
    
    The other thing I would comment on is the difference between your public and personal face/persona ... why is there a difference? Don't you want people to know the real you?
    
    You know, as an aside, I have to say that it was most interesting to get your mail just a while ago because I was wondering just yesterday or the day before if you were going to send anything out.
    
    Thank you for allowing me to be part of your book taking shape!
    
    All the best!
    
    Nneka

47. Jorge Meave (2018-08-06) #

    I like the part about that we know so little every time, and as we grow up and learn more.
    
    I think confidence is good as long as you use it wisely, pride turns confidence into something negative, but wisdom takes time to develop and it is a journey through your whole life
    
    Keep charing!

48. Francesca Amari (2018-08-06) #

    Thank you for this. It’s the journey and your impact on your journey that counts. Be the best you that you can. Nothing else matters.

49. G j (2018-08-06) #

    Just thought of quote I read... “In theory there is no difference between theory and practice. In practice there is”.—Yogi Berra

50. Jaeden Martinez (2018-08-06) #

    This is great stuff Derek, something that I luckily am learning early on. The more you know the more you realize you don't know. An interesting point you could make is that this mindset allows you to take every interaction/experience as a learning opportunity, rather than disregarding someone because you think they know less than you, in turn bettering your work.

51. annie (2018-08-06) #

    Derek, I get the very strong feeling you're a classic Dunning-Kruger case of high-competence/low-self-scoring. (I wonder what the proper label for that is.) But wasn't one of the articles you wrote for the CD Baby marketing blog was about doing what you do for your audience, not just for yourself? Your success didn't happen because of luck; it happened because you're actually an uncommonly capable person.

52. Earnest L. Hines (2018-08-06) #

    Derek,
    
    You always move me forward, no matter how little or how much you say, there is something to gain and a thought provoking idea.
    Thanks for sharing your thoughts and plans with me.
    
    All the best on any new successes,
    
    Ernie Hines

53. Jake Antelis (2018-08-06) #

    "But the more I learned, the more I realized how little I knew....|
    
    this. thanks.

54. Arnold Hugo Stolting (2018-08-06) #

    Hey, Derek.
    
    Reading your last sentence, "Now I aim to make my work — my contribution to the world — just unique and useful." I wonder, is it possible that you have come full circle?
    
    I mean, when all you wanted to do back in the day was put your CD up for sale, but then one friend asked, “Could you sell my CD, too?” didn't you out of your good heart just do it as a favor? Which then started "an accidental business?
    
    By contributing to the world, how will you avoid starting what may become a business (with all its headaches) again?

55. Susan (2018-08-06) #

    There are a few people I come across whose (pretty much) every word rings true for me.
    
    You are one of them. Seth Godin is (often) another. Usually (okay, not fucking always) Mark Manson. Mel Robbins.
    
    This is so game-on direct, accurate and truthful -- and describes exactly where I've gotten stuck myself. Gonna go do some writing... and contributing. Thanks DS; you're a gem.

56. Eric Dyke (2018-08-06) #

    Part of me thinks the confidence you speak of is more akin to arrogance. I've seen it in myself plenty. Success, especially luck driven success, brings bravado that really acts as a masks to one's ignorance. It's a false confidence.
    
    I think there is a place for confidence but we have to be careful it isn't this false version. And in terms of what you wrote, I'd say that you are confident in the better sense of the word. I like to think if we bring authenticity to our work, and if our intentions are pure, we should feel confident about our work.
    
    The rat race that consumes most people rarely brings out confidence because our actions aren't authentic and our intentions are shallow or worse. How often do people really enjoy the work they do?
    
    Anyway, just my thoughts at the end of a long weekend. Thanks for sharing yours.

57. Brent Pinkston (2018-08-06) #

    Derek
    There is so much truth in this. This hits home for me. I have been learning and studying, and haven't have done much contributing. Thank you for this article very timely in my life on several fronts. I guess I could even extend this further to say focus on learning a fewer number of things, and make sure what you are learning can be contributed. On another mess confidence and self worth is one of the greatest traps that man has allowed himself to be ensnared by. Thanks Again!

58. John Hanson (2018-08-06) #

    I really love the sentiment here. Your writing is so personal always something I love about it. I’m not sure if you would agree but I think one sentence/paragraph that could benefit the article is mentioning that while working for the sake of contributing, you find yourself enjoying the work more rather than focusing on the end goal. In my experience that has also been beneficial and that’s how I think of it. By doing this he may be able to get away from working to merely satisfy your ego or some preconceived notion of how things should be. Nice work, looking forward to reading more!!

59. Dr.Mani (2018-08-06) #

    I read dozens, even hundreds of blog posts and articles every month. I share about ten of them with my friends and family. Once every few months, I bookmark, save, or print out a copy for future reference. Even more rarely, I will keep it beside my work area to read again and again, for inspiration, direction and meaning.
    
    The moment I read this one, I did.
    
    Thank you, Derek.

60. Michael (2018-08-06) #

    Marvelously humble. If you are always putting your best best foot and effort forward, using what resources you already have or what you have learned, helping others, taking responsibility, you can take solace in that.

61. barbara (2018-08-06) #

    Well said Derek! I went through the same thing recently and still feeling quite stupid as I plow my way through new technology that scared the shit out of me for numerous years. But taking action is definitley helping.

62. Lee Cutelle (2018-08-06) #

    Definitely a lot of food for thought in this post.

63. Luis Paz (2018-08-06) #

    I hit upon this same train of thought a year ago when I had to move and I had to move my three immense bookcases.
    
    I pondered on the library of Alexandria, and on all the knowledge this world has seen, lost, and its purpose. I mean, don't we all die anyways. My friend recently had. 35 year old, undetected stage 4 stomach cancer which had metastized. Gone in month. Left behind a young, unemployed widow with two daughters.
    
    Did he go to heaven? Did he rencarnate? Is he one with the cosmos? Or is he nothing? Until I came upon the same phrase you did, learning without doing is wasted. Jewels thrown to the pigs.
    
    I've learned a lot from great people, amazing people, people with character and people that orbit on a different level of knowledge than us. Einstein, Tesla, Benjamin Franklin, the Dalai Lama, Mahatma Ghandi are a few that come to mind. Ive immersed myself in trying to understand their ways and live like they did with my twist on things. In my opinion they shared certain traits. One of them is the love for Humanity, for living creatures, for doing good, for giving themselves for a greater cause. Elevating themselves from the mere physical state to living in a realm above themselves. Finding yourself by giving yourself to others.
    
    I now help my friends wife and family every two weeks, try to do a kind, selfless deed everyday and I do it, like you said, for myself, because even though it may seem selfish, it makes me shine inside, lights my soul up. Kind of like lighting someones candle with my own, slowly illuminating the world.
    
    I applaud your paper, the song: "its my birthday and ill cry if I want to" comes to mind. Hahaha its a great topic one that may fall on many deaf eyes nowadays but that, I'm sure, will reach the right eyes accordingly. (Can't wait) ✌👏👏👏

64. Denny (2018-08-06) #

    Nobody is judging me, because nobody is thinking of me.
    
    Genius! And true for all of us. If more thought that way there would be less hangups and more contribution.
    
    You're always a good read, bud.

65. Damon (2018-08-06) #

    My neighbhor is a terrible drummer, and he’s keeping me awake.

66. Hardeep Dhindsa (2018-08-06) #

    I really loved this- not only because it makes total sense but also because it resonates (at least for me) at a very deep level.
    Thank you so much

67. Mike Milnarik (2018-08-06) #

    Thanks, Derek! Timing is everything and yours is always impeccable. This entire article is great, but the part that just "got through" the most was ...
    
    "If I don’t use what I learn, then it was pointless. How horrible to waste those hundreds of hours I spent learning, and not turn it into action. Like throwing good food in the trash: it’s morally wrong. At least I should share what I’ve learned."
    
    I needed that! Thanks!
    
    Mike

68. Peter Williams (2018-08-06) #

    Excellent as usual Derek. Aligned to your and Seth Godin’s other messages — start at 0, ship your work, keep iterating.

69. Barb DiMarco (2018-08-06) #

    It is an honor to serve mankind in whatever way we find- even in secret.
    To me it has become little ways to inspire others. You don't necessarily need big recognition. You've already done that! Stay open and ask the golden web of consciousness and your next venture may present itself...love your thoughts!!

70. Kevin King (2018-08-06) #

    My measure is "am I effective?". It's one thing to learn something, it's another thing to use that to help someone. Until the latter thing happens, the former thing hasn't.

71. Sean Hughes (2018-08-06) #

    Hi Derek
    
    I’ve always enjoyed your outlook and perspective over the years. Some fun or funny anecdotes or examples would positively reinforce your thoughts. Great subject matter and great thoughts on the subject. I found it very helpful for me personally at a point I’m at in my life.
    
    Sean Hughes

72. Doug (2018-08-06) #

    "By turning and turning we turn round right."

73. Susan Pytwan (2018-08-06) #

    Thank you for this rare and raw peek into your life.
    As for me, I just keep chugging along with my Holocaust Work. I have also started to redo the original "Blue" CD.
    Suzi More

74. Anon (2018-08-06) #

    I think I’m probably in the foolishly “thinking I’m right” stage.. but the tricky part is determining which of those things I’m misevaluating...How can we improve our chances of being right about what we think we’re right about?
    
    P.S. As I read other comments I’m realizing what I got out of this is nowhere near what others got out of it. I clearly fixated on one little snippet and missed the big picture. Funny how we selectively listen based on what we’re seeking.

75. Bill Keefe (2018-08-06) #

    Funny to see you describe a journey similar to mine (minus the success of course)...
    
    Imagine coming to those same conclusions without any money. What would you do? How far could you go? The truth is we ALL have it within ourselves to tough it out much longer than we think...
    
    If you allow yourself to fail long enough... then failure turns to self sacrifice. And when self sacrifice spans enough time (for the betterment of others)...
    
    Well, then self sacrifice becomes moral authority.
    
    And with enough moral authority... anything is possible.
    
    Derek... have your nighttime dreams created a true paradigm shift for you yet?

76. Scott McCoy (2018-08-06) #

    Hi Derek,
    
    Nice to read your words, keepin' it real you are.
    
    You made your money and got out 8-), now your free to do anything that gets you up in the morning or keeps you up late.
    
    Pema Chodron talks about being stuck and unstuck for the masses.
    
    Truth is a pathless land - J. Krishnamurti.
    
    We're all on different journeys, no race for anything really.
    
    It can be fun if you look at it as a game only.
    
    Living in Silicon OMG, let's win big at all cost, crush crush crush Yikes!
    You get sucked in by accident, its contagious. Not healthy though.
    
    My next job is to find a role that has no advancement.
    Got that from Ottmar Leibert, cute huh.
    
    It's nice to know your right where you need to be, all the time.
    
    Enjoy the day brother.
    
    California is burning at the moment, all over the place.
    I cannot imagine what a firefighter goes through with all that gear and heat, its mind blowing.
    
    All we have is right now. Whoever we are.
    
    Its so cliche but very true, just like the Nike ad.
    
    JUST DO IT!
    
    ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
    
    Food for thought.
    
    J. Krishnamurti Online
    
    Action without the process of thought
    What do we mean by idea? Surely idea is the process of thought. Is it not? Idea is a process of mentation, of thinking; and thinking is always a reaction either of the conscious or of the unconscious. Thinking is a process of verbalization which is the result of memory; thinking is a process of time. So, when action is based on the process of thinking, such action must inevitably be conditioned, isolated. Idea must oppose idea, idea must be dominated by idea. There is a gap then between action and idea. What we are trying to find out is whether it is possible for action to be without idea. We see how idea separates people. As I have already explained, knowledge and belief are essentially separating qualities. Beliefs never bind people; they always separate people; when action is based on belief or an idea or an ideal, such an action must inevitably be isolated, fragmented. Is it possible to act without the process of thought, thought being a process of time, a process of calculation, a process of self-protection, a process of belief, denial, condemnation, justification. Surely, it must have occurred to you as it has to me, whether action is at all possible without idea.
    
    The Book of Life, February 17, HarperSanFrancisco, 1995
    
    
    Best,
    Scott

77. Alyson Thiessen (2018-08-06) #

    Derek. I like this and concur. This writing of yours is a bit of a kick in the pants. I too followed a similar path as yours. Going to take my new lessons and build some
    Muscle.

78. Shari Tallon (2018-08-06) #

    Hi Derek, thanks for sending me this article I can really relate to your experience, It is what I have experienced as a musician. iif you wait until you are perfect you will miss out on all the gifts and the experience of playing or releasing a new song and what it can bring as a positive energy that creates and inspires 🦅 just like what you have done for artists with CD Baby and now even a larger community with your writing
    It’s really interesting that you sent this article tonight because just before I read it I was thinking about my job as a piano product manager I work for the Steinway piano gallery Toronto during the day and so many people put off the dream of playing music because they’re afraid to fail instead of looking at the experience of what this relationship with a beautiful musical instrument will bring them
    Thanks
    Can’t wait to read your next article
    Shari
    i

79. Fred (2018-08-06) #

    More great stuff with no wasted words,
    
    "I hear and I forget.
    I see and I remember.
    I do and I understand."
    - Confucius

80. Heather (2018-08-06) #

    Your first point - learning without doing is wasted - is right on. We should all seek to make the world better by using what we learn, no matter what it is or how we use it. For me, that translates to taking a mission-oriented approach to everything I do. Thanks for articulating the idea this way.

81. Francisco Munoz (2018-08-06) #

    I hear you. I felel we are all on the quest to find fulfillment in what we do day in and day out . To stay balanced and to be FREE from our situation. My hope is that you are there.
    
    Peace
    
    Dr Frank Nunoz

82. Greg Lyons (2018-08-06) #

    Brilliant! Thanks Derek. Your best yet!

83. Grant Piros (2018-08-06) #

    Love the concept of the downside of early success, keeping one “ignorant of their short comings”. Also love the focus that’s it’s all about the work, not you, just being unique and useful. This is hard to master.
    
    I’d like to hear more on the lines:
    “Nobody is judging me, because nobody is thinking of me. They are just looking for things to improve their own life.”
    
    This is a powerful idea and seems like an abrupt transition after that.
    
    Thanks for sharing!

84. Rafa (2018-08-06) #

    Losing yourself means Sweet Freedom! Thank you

85. Nico (2018-08-06) #

    Thanks for putting these thoughts to paper and sharing. In essence, thanks for contributing something that is very insightful and useful.

86. Jerry Avila (2018-08-06) #

    Your comment about how no one cares about "you" the creator is so true. People care about how what "you" create makes them feel,how it might reinforce or improve their existing or perceived view of themselves. Also great how this concept ties into not being afraid to take action, because if someone criticizes your work, all it speaks is their perception and is not really about "you" .
    
    Thanks for sharing, looks like it will be a great book.

87. Brian (2018-08-06) #

    Very humbling words indeed. Sometimes I feel the same way about young and naïve confidence with now some experience looking back I feel that we need to stumble around in life to learn what we need to and move on to the next part of the adventure. Thanks for your insightful words. Always inspiring.

88. Greg Steele (2018-08-06) #

    This has the ring of truth and relevancy. I like this because I came to some of these myself and I believe others need to learn. Kudos Derek.

89. Charles (2018-08-06) #

    I understand totally I’m in the process of attempting to write a great set of tutorials that will eventually become the basis for a book and workbook. I set out with gusto to write a few tutorials a week and now here I am three weeks later stalled on a tutorial I “thought” would be simple but has clearly challenged me growing larger and more complex than expected I was about ready to toss the whole mess and start over but based on what you said that would be like throwing good food in the trash. I need to regroup and rethink how to break this down and put it into a mini course thanks for the perspective

90. Nguyen Chien Cong (2018-08-06) #

    That’s great! You’ve helped me in my darkest times and I hope I can be helpful to you as well. We can all make a better world with Love

91. Rafael Abreu (2018-08-06) #

    In summary, “Giving without expectation of rewards” seems like a great way to live.
    
    Today’s world, though, wants to tell us that if we don’t get a lot back we are not enough or fools not to charge for what we give.
    
    Innerscorecard. For few.

92. Rhian (2018-08-06) #

    Always appreciate your perspective and writing Derek. One piece of feedback on #1 Learning without doing. This did not resonate with me. It implies that learning is only valuable if it produces something tangible, changes something in a prescriptive way. In my experience, a learning experience is often internal, enriches perspective, challenges a belief, teaches you about what you do or don't like and more. Overall, a genuine openness and curiosity to learning, enables us to give more of ourselves.

93. David Griffith (2018-08-06) #

    First and immediate thought is that we’re not in a position to know quite how our work and/or public utterances affect others. Personally I’ve found your articles nourishing, not necessary useful but nourishing nonetheless and – you’re right – I don’t know the private individual that you are, nor does it matter.
    
    Someone starving perhaps doesn’t much care if the meal is prepared with love. … not sure why that thought followed.
    
    ‘The work is the point, and my work is unique.’ That idea is apt. I don’t read your articles to get an earthquake update, Dutchsinse does that well. Same applies in all those other areas of interest in which others specialise and from whom I learn.
    
    And, of course, as I age so I realise how little I really know. Perhaps that’s why ethical behaviour matters so much.
    
    On your title ‘You don’t need confidence, just contribution.’ How true that is in so much of life. While my music stutters and falters, it hasn’t stopped me from spending time over the last three years in the plantings and ongoing care needed at our local park through which a greening has happened. While the odd person has commented pleasantly on our work that isn’t the point nor is it the purpose. It doesn’t matter who did the work as long as the work got done. Yippee for lack of confidence but contribution nonetheless.

94. Murphy Karges (2018-08-06) #

    Derek.
    
    Thanks for the email and your note about this chapter. I hate to be the lone salty guy on the comment board, selfishly wondering if your email to me was from your fingers or from some kind of automatic thing, but I did wonder. And judging from the insane amount of people commenting on a chapter from the future (It's still only 8-5-2018 here) I can totally understand how that makes sense.
    
    Either way, I enjoyed your little blurb here.
    
    Dig how short it is. Short stuff rules.
    
    I like how you keep affirming that you really know less and less the more you gather information and grow in intelligence... that resonates.
    
    Cheers from California.
    
    Murphy Karges

95. Dawn (2018-08-06) #

    Thanks for this. I would love to see you expound on all three bullet point, please and thank you.

96. Lorelei (2018-08-06) #

    Hi Derek. I always love your stuff. This is interesting but to me...not detailed enough. I want the details as a reader and not hyper-linked. So I hope there’s more to it and this is but a sliver. Tell me what happened to you. Looking forward to more. This sounds like the lessons of what happened to you but I don’t really see how you came to that. Make sense? Not even with the hyperlinks.

97. Diane (2018-08-06) #

    Hi Derik!
    Good article and so very true ... I have to say this to you
    though I really pray you find a relationship with Jesus Christ if you haven’t yet because ...
    Only that will create true living and lead you to all truth. This life is a testing
    Ground where we have choices to make and I hope you
    Make a right one with the Lord .

98. Rita Esterly (2018-08-06) #

    Interesting perspective. I do believe your work is useful. I have used your video of dancing man & the concept of the first follower in my Rotary training I have done in the past & in my therapy with people who feel inferior to a friend who lives in the spotlight. Your idea of the first follower has given many back their own smiles. So, yes, your work is useful to those who actually understand your unique perspective.

99. Anth (2018-08-06) #

    We enter a time where information is entertainment. Everyone talks over the music. In America, it's about politics. It's about new and unexpected uniforms and allegiances. It takes two armies, and entertainment is splitting apart, so of course, many feel stuck. Some things will catch on, some things will win, but things will definitely be different. But that's a market in itself; the next barely-acceptable style will become acceptable, as history marches on with or without us.

100. Dahlia (2018-08-06) #

     Thanks Derek for another insightful post. Sometimes I don't think I'm good enough to contribute, yet, but maybe I should just jump in and take up the opportunity because there's never a perfect time!

101. Buddy Mix (2018-08-06) #

     "If you aren't being criticized you aren't doing anything." Seems like you are being awfully self critical. So you did something. Usefu? Yes. Recognized? Maybe. But a great learning experience. Carry on. The world needs you. Buddy Mix www.Teachtheworldtosing.net

102. Sean Crawford (2018-08-06) #

     My, oh my.
     Derek, not only does your short sweet post contain enough good sentences and paragraphs to inspire a whole night of discussion around a table, but so many of the comments inspire a response too.,
     
     So many comments, so little time—but the golden number is three. So here goes three replies:
     
     In comment #69 Barb DiMarco notes "It is an honor to serve mankind in whatever way..." Yes. Science fiction writer David Gerrold, in his Chtorr War novels, (especially the third) notes that we can be on earth as a guest, or as a host, with the latter being the most fitting.
     
     In comment # 63, Luis Paz mentions famous people. A man now forgotten, but famous in his day for being one of the few (or only living person) to ever start a world wide organization, Lord Baden-Powell, of Boy Scout fame, once ended a journalist's interview by writing him a note to take away: (from memory) "Some think that it is best to receive, others know it is best to give."
     
     In comment #27, George Kao's short sweet contribution is what was on my mind.
     
     Derek, and everyone, please don't sweat over being unique, if only because there are new babies being born every minute to whom your contribution is new and unique, or at least uniquely needed right then, as they are at last ready to learn it.
     
     As a writer, I relate to Kao's point, because people tell me they can tell my work out of a lot of written pieces, yet I never tried to have any unique voice, I merely tried to show up and put in the man-hours.

103. Charles page (2018-08-06) #

     Derek..thank you..you are on the right path and I really needed to hear this right now..cause I have been feeling pretty lost these days. Looking forward to the book....Chuck

104. Allen Smithson (2018-08-06) #

     So... What is the right amount of confidence?
     
     I'm currently contributing as a Elementary school teacher. How do I know if that is enough?
     
     I believe I have ideas that would benefit millions of people, but have only daydreams of how to get the attention of those that would benefit, long enough for them to read, hear, or watch. There are so many voices out there vying for attention.
     
     I have a big natural desire to contribute, but almost none to compete. I also have no problem working hard when I am convinced that the work will actually contribute. The desire to contribute on a larger scale is worthless without action, and all the action I've tried seems highly linked to competition.
     
     Thanks for making me think about it.

105. Ilene Angel (2018-08-06) #

     This message that contribution is more important than confidence is so timely. I think most of us are waiting for perfection or for things to look a particular way. We want things tidy, when, in fact, we need to be willing to let them be messy, but of some benefit to someone else. Great reminder.

106. Fahad (2018-08-06) #

     Love it!
     Do you really think that it was 'unfortunate' that were lucky and successful?

107. Bill (2018-08-06) #

     Count me in as guilty as charged. Great eye opener Derek. Thank you.

108. Sarah Moon-Lunde (2018-08-06) #

     This is just what I needed right now! Thank you for taking the time to reach out with your thoughts & simple, kind words.

109. Madalyn Sklar (2018-08-06) #

     Great insights, Derek. Keep rockin’!

110. Elazar (2018-08-06) #

     Very well said. I can identify with that stuck feeling. After being involved with a once in a lifetime masterpiece, its hard to "top it". I'm delighted that you were able to let it go and start over again. Embrace your new life! We are all rooting for you!

111. Caroline (2018-08-06) #

     Heck fcking yes. Thank you for writing this. I love it SO much. #NowToShare

112. Fermín (2018-08-06) #

     Nice article Derek. I specially enjoyed this thought:
     "I’ve got my own weird angle on things"
     It reminded me of something I heard somewhere else - it was something like: "embrace your funk"
     
     I love (and totally believe) the idea that it is in your particular view of life that you can find something vital, new and of value to others.

113. Griffin (2018-08-06) #

     My brain wanted the second paragraph to say something like "Fortunately I was lucky and got successful, unfortunately that kept me ignorant of my shortcomings."
     Not trying to rewrite your post, haha. But maybe you get what I mean?
     I love this! I feel the same way about songwriting. My young self was cocky enough to think that maybe I was some kind of genius when I was just a beginner and had no idea what I was doing and now that I've been at it awhile it seems like that beginners luck and youthful confidence evades me. This whole excerpt is really timely encouragement and insight, you never know what might just be really useful to someone. in writing, as with everything in life, it feels the best and seems the most useful when I'm asking not what I'm getting but what I'm giving. Thanks for this empowering post Derek

114. Jerrod (2018-08-06) #

     Hey, Derek. I'd be surprised if you really knew who I was. You are the one I believe taught me to send emails, a personal email, to those who bought my CD. I'd like to send or express to you my personal thoughts on this particular subject I am responding to. To you personally via email of course. Or personal assistant however you do things day. I think you will get a lot out of it. By the way, thanks for the exerts for my school project some years back. Didn't pass the class but , still, thanks.

115. Lance (2018-08-06) #

     Great post, though, are you down playing the role of confidence in life? Maybe what we need more of is humble confidence, where we are able to still learn but yet be brave enough to take risks.

116. Ross Henry (2018-08-06) #

     Thanks for sharing this Derek, it has reinforced two views I've recently been contemplating... "Learning without doing is wasted" & "This isn't about me".
     
     The third point you touched upon is most challenging though. I think the "unique" road, while probably the most intrinsically important, is often a lonely road to walk, at least in the beginning anyway.
     
     Am looking forward to learning more about your new book.

117. Dean Wilson (2018-08-06) #

     Good stuff, as usual. Always look forward to what you allow us to see of your thoughts, years ago when you sold your company the financial arrangements you made were unlike any I had heard off (or probably could conceive). Along my journey I came up with a personal operation mandate to offset the meteoric rise to success (in my mind) and the predictable fall from grace. All of it stolen from minds and hearts I found along the way...
     I am
     I do not know
     I accept
     Be deliberate
     This has served me so well in the last 10 years. No need to be anything, every moment filled with opportunity to be of service. Money is no longer the objective, relegated to a source of energy to interact effectively.
     Thanks for being, you are very much appreciated.

118. Brendon (2018-08-06) #

     Today I hit the lowest point in my job of 2.5 years - I was flying high, kicking goals but now I feel like I don’t fit in the team anymore and it’s time to move on. Live and learn. Good to know even really successful people have thier bad days/ years.

119. Christine (2018-08-06) #

     Thank you. I really like what you say about applying learning. Very pertinent to me.

120. Claude Needham (2018-08-06) #

     Very nice.
     I would make a observation/suggestion though.
     The word "unique" doesn't feel quite right.
     The way it appears in the final sentence positions it as a criterion. Depending on how you actually use it, it could be manifesting as a filter.
     
     "Oh, hey, this is a nice way to make a contribution... oh wait, that doesn't look unique. Perhaps I should reconsider making that contribution. It doesn't seem unique enough."
     
     Okay, I admit that is a clumsy presentation of the idea. Hopefully the gist of the idea gets through.
     
     And, as I said, it's just a suggestion for something to look at. You know, the idea if being careful about constructing filters that might inhibit your flow.
     
     Really liked your presentation.

121. Christopher Maloney (2018-08-06) #

     One of the biggest challenges is to get out of your own way. To not take things personally. To not cower at rejection. I knew this as a freelance musician (successful, I may add), but it's taken a while to learn as a business owner (absolutemusicstudios.com). I felt that people should just love on what I was offering, because I was offering something unique and different. However, I was only thinking of what people should think of ME, rather than what people want to "improve their life". Why I didn't make this connection before I don't know. I always knew bar owners didn't care about music, but how many asses they put in the seats. I just have to move that philosophy into my 'new' (9 years and counting) business and keep offering things that make people's lives better. Thanks for the post!

122. Steve Kusaba (2018-08-06) #

     I agree with this post more than any other and I like a lot of others.
     
     At first in life you attribute all of your success to brilliance and failures to bad luck. Over time you figure out that a lot of your success was due to luck and your inexperience added to your failures. Thus you learn to not get to high or not get too low. You remember all of your errors and it tones down your over confidence. But you do know that inactivity and lack of learning with further mistakes is a colossal dead end.
     
     Now its best of all worlds, informed by your failures you adjust you processes to trap errors more, be more flexible and able to reverse course all while repeating doggedly that which works. And you modify that which works to be even more successful.
     
     When you're really young you have no way of understanding what decades of experience and lessons can do to your perspective.

123. Toby Goodman (2018-08-06) #

     Really helpful and a great insight.
     Doesn’t need the last 2 paras.
     Can’t wait for the book. Do the work my man.

124. Laurence (2018-08-06) #

     The first thing that struck was "Unfortunately I was lucky and got successful".
     My own belief is that we make our own luck to large degree.
     The old adage of "Ignorance is bliss" may also apply here to an extent.
     Wealth seems to bring it's own set of issues to deal with and like all circumstance we all deal with them in our own way. As far as contribution we all have to contribute we have no choice if we are alive. The value of the contribution is a variable. Confidence in that contribution is another. We all have the ability to contribute and make a difference. But the difference is a matter of scale - same as success I think - it's all relative. I have always enjoyed your positive attitude and was pleased for your success. I'm not sure how I would have coped with your "unfortunate luck". I buy lotto tickets each week in the hope of finding out. I think if I won - I'd tell no one - but I would contribute more financial help to causes I believe in than I can afford to do now. I have a basic belief in humankind and kindness and so hope that the rich do what I would do - after spoiling myself and loved ones a little and the novelty of wealth wearing off and embracing my new reality. We in the most part employ Governments to do the big stuff on our behalf and our votes and democracy is the best attempt / check and balance we have to keep them honest. In the grand scheme of things our individual 'health' is our wealth and that is a natural form of lotto! Right and wrong I think is most important applied to morality and that comes back to conscience and to some extent upbringing - regardless of wealth. Life is a series of choices decisions and consequences we make and deal with we can only do our best based on what we know. We can only learn so much so we need to place trust and faith in those smarter than us. We need to learn how not to do stuff as well as how to do stuff. This has served me personally very well so far in my experience. I am 'confident' in you - and I only know you through a result of your confidence and naivity but I also feel / know you have grown personally and striven to do so in a positive way. I suspect you have made many great differences in your own life and those of many others - mostly positive and with good intentions. We can only do what we can do without imploding - we have to keep it 'real' at all times - oops heading down another tangent path here - pull back pull back! The virtual world has linked many like us but can provide over confidence and removal from reality. The measure of life is the memories we make along the way and leave behind. Eventually we all become photographs if any photographs of us were taken and survive. Everybody judges it's a basic instinct of the human condition - not all judge fairly with balance for a variety of reasons but it is something we can all improve on as we live. Same with our tally of mistakes. As you imply life is not a contest it is just life and we are best served to judge our own before others. Others can provide perspective - I'm attempting that with this reply - longwinded I know - sorry! I am trying to help as best I can. Wealth can buy a better class of misery for some people I suppose - a mate of mine used that in a song once called "Follow the money". But I digress again! Contentedness is a noble aim and achievable relative to our attitude. I hope I'm not coming across as preachy here - you did ask? I don't believe your old confidence has gone is may well have changed or you no longer feel over confident. You have to earn some things in life besides money. One is respect - respect is demanded at times by people without them earning it - is that over confidence - I'm not sure. Opinion - we all have one - well two actually on most matters - some are educated and informed - some are just flying thoughts. I take it as a compliment that you still ask for mine despite all you have achieved thank you. I value your contribution and respect what I know of you I have learnt much from you and shared what I have learnt when appropriate. Keep growing and changing once that stops it's the end - apart from that photograph and memories and in your case books etc...…
     In a nutshell just be glad to be able to play and be in the band to play a part the best you can. Some will like your music some won't - there are only two types of music.
     Cheers
     
     Laurence

125. Erika (2018-08-06) #

     While I do like this piece a lot, there are two points that I would like you to think and clarify. First one is semantics. What you call confidence on the first paragraph, it is arrogance (“I was right and everyone else was wrong “, as you mentioned it). You still have confidence to do what you want without fear of judgment from others.
     
     The other part is “If I don’t use what I learn, then it was pointless”. I learned how to ride a bike when I was a kid, haven’t use that tool in years. Was it pointless? I have a friend, she is a doctor, miserable in her profession, but because she feels like she needs to use what she learned she goes on. She is trapped in the sunken cost fallacy.

126. Jim Vilandre (2018-08-06) #

     Well said Derek! I have learned in my time on planet earth that taking the humble road in things will actually be the very thing that will catapult you to success. As I have adopted the policy of being a lifelong learner I have come understand the more I learn the more I don't know. This revelation has been amazing to come to that conclusion. So for what my contribution to thought is worth: Press on in the role of sharing wisdom. It will serve all who are willing to take something from it and make the world a better place to be. God bless you Derek! Jim Vilandre www.jimvilandre.com

127. Sven (2018-08-06) #

     Hi Derek,
     
     this correlates quite nicely with two trains of thought I am currently pondering.
     
     #1:
     (Learn to) love the process.
     
     Here I try to express the experience that you can only create something truly great for and useful to others if you not only love the result. You need to feel joy/contentment while amidst in the weeds. Else you burn out and won't be around to be useful for long.
     
     It is like when on a plane. There they tell you, that in case of an emergency you first need to secure the o2 facemask to your own face, before helping others. Only that way you can help others without becoming a helpless lump or flesh and bones yourself.
     
     #2:
     
     Don't succumb to your ego.
     
     This comes directly from the Ryan Holiday Book 'Ego is the enemy'.
     
     A book I re-read about once a year. Just as a reminder. Not always working, though. But that - becoming better at ignoring the pull of my ego - is also a process.

128. calvin (2018-08-06) #

     love the humility in this piece. as i get older i appreciate humility more and more.

129. Paul Claireaux (2018-08-06) #

     Nice one Derek.
     Sounds like you've travelled down the "Dunning Kruger" curve.
     If only more people did that, the world would be a better place.
     And the good news is that this curve turns back up again as we extend our learning.
     And I'm ruddy 'confident' that you (and I) will keep doing that.
     Take it steady man.
     Paul

130. Beatriz (2018-08-06) #

     Exactly what I think. If we have a voice and something useful to say we must speak. If we can contribute, even in a small way, to help others or improve things to everybody we have the obligation to do it otherwise we are here just occupying space.

131. Scott Manny (2018-08-06) #

     I disagree with this line:
     
     “If I don’t use what I learn, then it was pointless!”
     
     While I agree that it’s wonderful to have your learnings manifest into something useful, I wouldn’t call it pointless. If you enjoyed yourself while learning about plants but never became a gardener, but you were taught by a wonderful old man who loved plants...and you and him both had an enjoyable experience - then I think the universe is somehow better off than if it never happened.

132. kris (2018-08-06) #

     What you are describing here is a more meaningful form of "confidence" than naive bravado.
     
     I can try things that I may not do perfectly - especially at first - and enjoy the process.
     
     I am unique and I learn and improve as I go along.
     
     Past successes don't make me immune from failure. Past failures don't render me immune from future successes.

133. Dess (2018-08-06) #

     Can't wait for the new book! From the extract above I can feel some R Holiday air scaled :) Good luck with the launching!

134. ivan (2018-08-06) #

     Your posts always give me a fresh perspective - thanks :)

135. Ron P (2018-08-06) #

     Great title! Very quote-worthy! Reminds me of that Edgar Allan Poe quote: “....self-confidence my friends call it!” 🙄

136. Sumeet Jariya (2018-08-06) #

     Similar kind of thoughts have been circulating my mind too Derek. Too much knowledge creates paralysis. So does perfectionism. It is better to take action and contribute, rather than trying to make the perfect piece of work. Cause true wisdom comes from taking action and learning from your mistakes.
     
     Regarding the article,
     Message is great, but needs a little better articulation.
     
     Good to hear from you after a long time.

137. Rebecca (2018-08-06) #

     Your comments sound like they're from a very wise elder.
     I'm getting up in age (it seemed to happen so suddenly!) and wonder if my life in the arts has any meaning. I spend so much energy trying to get gigs, and it gets more and more difficult. But one has to make a living. Money doesn't fall from the sky. So I'm having an anxious time right now. Even though I feel I have a little unique contribution to give the world, I don't know how to make it useful. But try I must.
     
     Thanks as always for your unique take on life.
     -Rebecca

138. Gavin James (2018-08-06) #

     You are describing the Dunning-Kruger effect when you talk about confidence and ignorance. https://www.kenzai.com/pulse/the-nature-of-knowledge/

139. Gwen (2018-08-06) #

     I spent hours/days/months/years studying science.. I still don't know how I can do anything with all the information in my head..

140. Charmaine (2018-08-06) #

     Hi Derek,
     Thank you for keeping me posted. I appreciate
     your sharing of the journey that you have taken. It is always an inspiration and an education, as well as a reminder of who I am- human like you. I resonate with most of what you say and share. Probably all of it. Please continue to include me. Thank you ,
     Charmaine Wilson

141. Heike (2018-08-06) #

     Oh yes! I totally understand and just saw myself...so good and helpful!

142. Ken Donaldson (2018-08-06) #

     "So I’m glad my old confidence is gone, because it thought I was right, and maybe even great. But I quit that contest."
     
     "Being right," has been my nemesis for most of my adult life.
     
     Now I'm trying to only " Be Real."
     
     I'm finding it to be much simpler, while I'm happier and seem to have more to genuinely offer others.
     
     Amazing what happens when letting go of "being right."
     
     And I do need to be reminded, frequently, so I appreciate this post...this reminder.
     
     My forgetter seems to work much harder than my rememberator.
     
     Thanks Derek.

143. Audio-Rarities (2018-08-06) #

     I share on facebook
     
     
     thanks,
     Best Regards
     Jan

144. Stefan (2018-08-06) #

     A story from real life and conclusions. Three thoughts. I find them useful.
     
     Thank you!
     All the best

145. Selim (2018-08-06) #

     This article made me realize that I learn and learn but only do so little. I have a striving music band and your articles help me learn a lot; and I'll be using them in my music career!
     
     Thank you,
     
     Selim

146. Anna (2018-08-06) #

     Wow!
     Love it.
     Thank you Derek.

147. Connie Jeon (2018-08-06) #

     I woke up this morning feeling deflated. Running a business daring to be different, scared as can be. This is exactly what I needed to hear.
     
     Thanks!

148. John Wolcott (2018-08-06) #

     Good post Derek.
     
     Looking at the email that brought me here, it sounds like this will be a chapter in your new book.
     
     But I think you could strengthen the message by using the second person "you" in the takeaways.
     
     "If you don’t use what you learn..."
     
     "This isn’t about you. How you feel right now doesn’t matter..."
     
     "The work is the point, and your work is unique. If you can do something..."
     
     Speaks to the reader :)
     
     Keep up the great work.
     
     - John

149. Ashsh Kolarkar (2018-08-06) #

     Dear Derek,
     
     I'm having the same feeling after being in an Industry for last 24 years. The work has shrinked. I'm looking for new things and feel like a novice. My earlier confidence has gone. But I've become saner. As suggested trying new things afresh. Great reading.

150. Lakshmi Pratury (2018-08-06) #

     This is the essence all spirituality - if you can do without expecting any results, if you just focus on your action of contribution, then you will be happy, which is the biggest wealth you can accumulate. Love your insights. Hugs. Lakshmi

151. Ann Hoy (2018-08-06) #

     Yes, Your art is something that nobody else can make, and expressing it and sharing it is the goal. You have a light that you have to put out into the world and the world can accept it or judge it or not, that isn't your concern in the process, but putting it out is the action that you have control over and feeling good about getting it out.

152. Denny (2018-08-06) #

     Contribute to other in helping them to get-the-job done. While continously learning, both for your own sake and others. The key is to connect with ‘your’ community. To feel useful and be useful.
     
     Your writing style changed. Something went unclick?

153. Larisa (2018-08-06) #

     Hello,
     
     1. The message is yours, so no comments on that.
     
     2. View on the phone:
     * everything starts with 'I' - for one story it should be fine, but a whole book filled with it would be tiresome
     * repetitive, no development and no story
     
     3. View from a computer:
     * still no story, it needs a little development (there were some stories in the comments that had the same message but were more interesting than the post)
     
     Thank you for your trust :)

154. K (2018-08-06) #

     Hi Derek,
     A very internal post. Am hoping, reading this, pushes me into action as well. As I myself have fallen into the pit of learning but not acting on it i.e. start relevant projects.
     
     Also I think, we seek continued success, and more of it. Expect it to be always better & bigger than the previous success. Which is wrong. As somebody said, 'success and failure are two impostors...'. But act we must. So very good post.

155. Kamal Subhani (2018-08-06) #

     I have been stuck in the weird loop
     
     1)Get excited about something
     2)Spend a lot of time learning about it
     3)Realise I am not good enough
     4)Get dishearted and quit
     5)Find a new distraction
     
     
     I really like your angle that even that I might not be perfect but still, I need to share those unique experiences and learning with the world as long I have even the bleakest hope that it might help someone in the future.
     
     
     Thanks for sharing these deep insights.
     
     Cheers,
     Kamal

156. Marius Miliunas (2018-08-06) #

     Interesting correlation between naïveté and confidence. We’ve all been there. I’m curious what you mean by learning without doing being morally wrong instead of an inefficient use of your own time. Where do the morals come in?

157. Thomas (2018-08-06) #

     Thank you for sharing this, you email/post hit home right as I am contemplating sharing and contributing more myself.
     
     What I'd reword/improve/underline is the point that I took away for myself:
     
     Do not wait until you are confident to share/contribute what you have learned.
     Share/contribute it regardless. You never know. It may be amazing to someone else despite your lack of confidence.

158. Dmitri Pisarenko (2018-08-06) #

     I think this article is 100 % true, if applied to people without serious mental issues.
     
     However, it is common that people grow up with enormous feelings of worthlessness, which they project to everything they do. Such ideas can be induced by bad parenting (narcissism, borderline disorder) or reinforced by the cultures they grow up in (e. g. most Eastern Europeans are more direct/rude than Americans and Germans). Such people may they think "I am worthless, therefore my code, writing, or music is worthless (useless) as well." They may think that even if the work isn't that bad (or can be improved if they only practiced). As a result, they don't even try, or they try not hard enough.
     
     I believe that smarter than average people with such issues tend to become artists of some sort (i. e. your target audience).
     
     Therefore, when such person has problems practicing (e. g. writing every day), they may want to ask themselves: "Why am I not working? Is it because I'm paralyzed by the knowledge, or is it the lack of confidence?"
     
     In other words: You need some level of "minimal viable confidence" in order to practice and get better.
     
     The worst thing is that you don't detect such problems easily. It's not a disorder that a psychiatrist can find out. But if a person is smart, hard-working, yet miserable and unsuccessful, this could mean they have deeper mental issues and need to invent their own success principles (because rules for "normal" people don't work for them).

159. Kathy (2018-08-06) #

     I'm glad I am still on whatever list you have.
     For the record, I don't normally reply to feedback requests, especially when my general thoughts are represented already by other respondents.
     But this piece had more soul than most, and made you a real person, easier to relate to than that guy who made a lot of quick money a penny at a time. That dumblucky guy.

160. Vicki (2018-08-06) #

     Hi Derek
     
     Thanks for this. I've been planning on writing a book, and the more I do background reading,the more the book recedes into the realm of uncertainty, overwhelm and loss of confidence.
     
     This post nudged me in the right direction.

161. Jason (2018-08-06) #

     Nice organization of thought. You write with an endearing honesty.
     
     Your comment, "Learning without doing is wasted," is a dipole pointing at "doing," caught my attention. Without doing, well...nothing gets done. I'm in accord with you there, with the vital nature of doing.
     
     Doing is not more important than learning. In experience, learning may be the prime key.
     
     My read sees the "learning" part of that dipole, a flag in the wind too easily ignored. Our culture hijacks much into the service of "doing." A lot of it is good, but one earmark of a shallow culture is one that puts an overbearing emphasis on the belief that learning is the handmaiden of doing. While that is definitely true as far as it goes––"doing" needs a handmaiden––it's also true that "learning" is the passageway to being present.
     
     I see politicians today much with "doing" while they've made a wholesale discount deal with the devil over learning. History will show they simply live in a poverty of consciousness.
     
     "Learning"––both formal education and autodidactic pursuits––get short shrift. In my observation "learning" needs to be supercharged onto a higher platform.
     
     Learning, if it perched on your shoulder for X time, may have contributions to make that we don't usually associate with "doing."
     
     Michael Toms, a one-time radio show host, used to say, "only when there's a change is consciousness will the world change." Learning feeds that. And of course (I hear you thinking), world change is the doing end of that dipole.
     
     None of this refutes your statement of course. "Doing" is defined by that pivot point of consciousness: something we need more of in this world.
     
     PS: I'm in accord with you, Contribution will always outweigh Confidence

162. Phillip Ansell (2018-08-06) #

     Hi Derek. I love the way you distil your articles to only say what matters (a touch of 'Hell Yeah or No') I love the links for a bit of a rabbit hole moment and sometimes its easy to wander off on a tangent, that is thoroughly enjoyable. I always end up wanting to know more ie: when you got stuck, what did that mean and how did it transpire in real terms of life and mental state? It seems you feel a bit undeserving of your success? To me it appears far from lucky... you put in the work and the work paid dividends.
     
     Keep up the work and I will be trying to do the same on my journey. I will be working hard to mine that vein of luck that runs as a seam within us all and just needs the effort to dig that bit deeper and keep digging.

163. Henning Olsen (2018-08-06) #

     Thank you for sharing. Reminds me of the boatman in "Steppenwolf" by herman Hesse

164. Ziv (2018-08-06) #

     Thank you Derek for the candid post.
     
     I believe happiness is not found in success. It's achieved when we find meaning in what we do with our life.
     
     Congratulations in finding your meaning.
     
     All the Best,
     Ziv.

165. catarina (2018-08-06) #

     Thank you! As always very insightful, to the point and useful!
     
     Coming to your idea from a different angle I have always considered that a lack of confidence together with some tenacity is one of the biggest drivers for achievement as being humble helps you take in ideas and inputs from others and try to do your best without considering that you are always right. But maybe that is also another form of arrogance and also a contest to quit.
     
     Good luck with your book! Looking forward to it!

166. Steve (2018-08-06) #

     Thank you. Absolutely what I needed to hear this morning. Simple, yet profound. Please keep on keeping on!

167. Luke Hurley (2018-08-06) #

     Connection with people. Share your hopes and fears and insights but don’t try to perfect everything. Perfectionism is a snare

168. Rhonda Merrick (2018-08-06) #

     I set up an arts centre in 2015, my goal was to make basic skills in music, art, theatre and dance available to everybody, especially families that couldn't afford private lessons for their kids. I wanted to make affordable shared spaces for artists to earn a living, meet students and put on performances and exhibits. I wanted a space to write and record my stuff. Nothing like it existed in my town, but people started coming from all over the county, because nothing quite like it existed where they live. Most of the money that flows through here goes to the artists, so there's not a lot coming to my little non-profit, but it's enough to keep puttering along. I have taught homeless children to play the piano and focus on the self-discipline required to create something. I set up a membership plan where poor families pay a flat monthly fee to give their children access to small group sessions in art, music and theatre. This plan attracts single mums, newly arrived immigrant families, the working poor living with their families in shared apartments above the restaurants they work in. I have taught some of these parents to speak enough English to find the confidence to enrol in a free class elsewhere and move up from menial jobs as their English improves and their children get lots of help and support in reading and writing as they make the art and music for quarterly theatrical performances. My little arts centre tends to attract the parents who want to give their children more opportunities than they had. I know what you mean about contributing. I had no idea how hard it would be to set this project up and run it... no idea at all and I'm glad about that, because I wouldn't have had the confidence to even attempt to build it otherwise. Sometimes, ignorance truly is bliss.

169. Benay (2018-08-06) #

     Thank you for sharing this Derek. I started following you about three years ago from the Tim Ferriss Show and I wonder if you are being a bit too hard on yourself here?
     
     I say this because I instantly admired how down-to-earth you were - you never struck me as over confident but rather a life-long learner. Perhaps the 'old you', you're referring to in this post goes back further than who you were three years ago when I first discovered you?
     
     Love your work and how I always feel like you are talking directly to me!
     
     XOX - B

170. Juli (2018-08-06) #

     Derek:
     Thank you for your contribution! It reminds me of Yoga Sutra 1.48:
     
     “You cultivate inner purity by actively practicing compassion, kindness, dispassion, and selfless service.”
     
     Keep making a difference!
     
     In kindness,
     inJOY!

171. Jimbo Berkey (2018-08-06) #

     "Now I aim to make my work — my little contribution to the world — just unique and useful." ~Derek
     
     "“There are two great days in a person’s life - The day we are born, and the day we discover why.” ~ William Barclay (1907-1978), Theologian and Professor at the University of Glasgow.
     
     Sound to me like you are now discovering why . . . ☺

172. Flora Duguid (2018-08-06) #

     Thank you for being vulnerable, true and raw! This really resonated with me - particularly point 1. It helps breakdown the "fear of doing".

173. AVRIL (2018-08-06) #

     Derek
     
     From all the books Ive read (hughe amount) INCLUDING YOURS - Why not think you are right and think you are great? That's a 'hell yeah' to me! But then I need your next book and as you know i been asking you for awhi)e!
     Avrilx

174. Trina Vaughn (2018-08-06) #

     I felt the same aa you, as if my work and thoughts did not matter to the world as long as I accomplished my goal! Which is publishing relatable poetry, but boy was I wrong! I learned that I was giving inspiration and allowing people to feel relieved that they too were not alone in their quest for, happiness, peace of mind, freedom from fear, etc!
     It has truly excelled my confidence in my work and the quest to work hard at making it better, so that I can continue to inspire lives! It is my purpose in life!
     
     Trina

175. Ant (2018-08-06) #

     Thanks a lot, needed this!

176. Mike Leatherwood (2018-08-06) #

     I spent 41 years running my used car business what i projected WAS the real me and my devoted customers were my friends. When I retired I lost my identity because that car dfealer and my real being were one and the same

177. Justin J West (2018-08-06) #

     I love that you said "Unfortunately I was lucky and got successful." My laziest thinking in hindsight came from times I felt I was right and had success. With some setbacks I've learned I'm an irrational optimist (which causes constant pain for myself and others around me) and usually wrong about things in some way or other. Powerful lessons.

178. Monika (2018-08-06) #

     Always good to read your thoughts Derek! I should definitely get the "Learning without doing is wasted." line printed, and put it up on the living room wall.

179. Jean-Baptiste Collinet (2018-08-06) #

     Short, to the point, easy to relate to (at least in my case).

180. Alexandra (2018-08-06) #

     Great reminder of the power of action in the learning process...and comforting to read of someone else paralysed by their seeing in new ways and then moving past this to be in service again. Thanks for sharing 🙏 😊

181. Alex (2018-08-06) #

     Hi Derek,
     your thoughts and expressions are perfect!
     I think and I have experienced, that not knowing too much, gives you a fresh approach, you Don't worry about obsticals you will may be never meet. Not knowing the right way makes you to find new ones.
     Alex

182. Liz Darcy Jones (2018-08-06) #

     Love this Derek.
     
     Mirrors where I am - first day without some books of wisdom at my side and venturing into chaos (which does not mean confused, as we commonly think but has its origins in 'the void, chasm' - 14th c.) It's here we feel our way in the dark - sharing these tentative steps without hope or expectation - and our experience may leave a footprint others find when they've got stuck.
     
     The triplet projects I'm currently quiver with the leaves of the 'trembling tree' - the poplar - whose fear or lack of confidence is intrinsic to its strength and voice...

183. Kishor KP (2018-08-06) #

     one should just do the things. I mean put first things first. If it does not reach the goal, then we need to see the gaps for reaching it. Keep filling the gaps and reach the goal.
     
     If we follow "The Power of Positive Thinking " way in our minds we would be stupids. Reality is blocked by your so called Positive Thinking mind. Real Perspective of life is lost. Perspective is very important.

184. Martin Craig (2018-08-06) #

     This contribution of yours comes at a time when ‘confidence’ trumps (small ‘t’) almost all other attributes in the world of ‘get ahead’. Brash leaders are dominating global politics, the notorious ‘bottom line’ (shareholder profits above all other considerations) trounces environmental and social concerns, ‘fake news’ obliterates rational argument. Techniques such as assertiveness training, which began as beneficial ways of helping people with low self-esteem, have become distorted into the ‘just do it, never apologise’ mantras of bullies, corporate lawyers and even tyrants. The phrase ‘quietly confident’ invites ridicule.
     
     In the face of this onslaught of unfounded, brash, unjustified, manufactured ‘confidence’, I believe that putting what we’re learning into some form of useful action, however small it may appear to be, is a powerful response. A single snowflake, combined with many others, becomes a blizzard.

185. Adina (2018-08-06) #

     Derek, the first idea from the list is the one that leaves me wondering. I get the point of it and it is totally valid when applied to things that can and should have a concrete and immediate application. But what if I want to learn about subject which have very limited applicability, if ever, like: the history of Italian opera music, the way gorillas have their social life organized or how many languages and dialects are used in modern China? Is there any way of using this knowledge in my personal or professional life? Not really. But I do enjoy spending time learning about subjects like these and the main reason I'm doing it is that I find enjoyment in this learning.

186. Lee (2018-08-06) #

     This is where I am at. Have learned a lot and I'm not doing anything with it. Thank you for choosing to share this particular piece. I look forward to the complete book.

187. Teodora (2018-08-06) #

     Thank you for this blog post! I am in a similar place, leaning, learning, but not creating because I imagine that what I want to create and say might not be good enough and that I need to learn more ...
     This is a good motivation to start making a contribution.
     
     Thank you!

188. Mike Puskas (2018-08-06) #

     Derek...spot on sonic bro!
     We humbly extend gratitude through the reflective lens of being in service to another. The more we work away from self to assist all creation the more the universe brings us exactly what we want!

189. Robert (2018-08-06) #

     Reading your 3rd point i was reminded a transformative story from Buckminster Fuller. Just food for thought. Summary from Wiki, enjoy.
     
     Cheers,
     Rob
     
     
     Depression and epiphany
     Buckminster Fuller recalled 1927 as a pivotal year of his life. His daughter Alexandra had died in 1922 of complications from polio and spinal meningitis[6] just before her fourth birthday.[7] Fuller dwelled on her death, suspecting that it was connected with the Fullers' damp and drafty living conditions.[7] This provided motivation for Fuller's involvement in Stockade Building Systems, a business which aimed to provide affordable, efficient housing.[7]
     
     In 1927, at age 32, Fuller lost his job as president of Stockade. The Fuller family had no savings, and the birth of their daughter Allegra in 1927 added to the financial challenges. Fuller drank heavily and reflected upon the solution to his family's struggles on long walks around Chicago. During the autumn of 1927, Fuller contemplated suicide by drowning in Lake Michigan, so that his family could benefit from a life insurance payment.[8]
     
     Fuller said that he had experienced a profound incident which would provide direction and purpose for his life. He felt as though he was suspended several feet above the ground enclosed in a white sphere of light. A voice spoke directly to Fuller, and declared:
     
     From now on you need never await temporal attestation to your thought. You think the truth. You do not have the right to eliminate yourself. You do not belong to you. You belong to Universe. Your significance will remain forever obscure to you, but you may assume that you are fulfilling your role if you apply yourself to converting your experiences to the highest advantage of others.[9]
     
     Fuller stated that this experience led to a profound re-examination of his life. He ultimately chose to embark on "an experiment, to find what a single individual [could] contribute to changing the world and benefiting all humanity."[10]

190. Will (2018-08-06) #

     We are all probably meant to share. And sharing pain is... well, painful.
     Peeling off the scabs of life hurt, but helps to heal.

191. Adrian (2018-08-06) #

     Derek,
     
     this topic resonates deeply with me. I wonder if you will get hundreds of similar responses as I suspect there must be some commonality between the folks who follow your work.
     
     I had my own epiphany and made very similar decisions and haven't felt like its "work" per se ever since. I live my passion and contribute what I know to be of value. I'm fortunate to find sponsors who put my efforts to work, and I continue the growing journey with a smile and healthy respect for the exhaustion!
     
     Keep inspiring us!
     
     Adrian

192. Kit Holmes (2018-08-06) #

     Thanks, Derek
     
     This is exactly what I needed to hear/read while awake at 4:30 am gnawing on "the more I know, the less I understand."
     
     After more than 40 years of a love/hate relationship with the music business and countless hours of doing deep inner work to maintain some semblance of sanity and peace with all the skills, talent and experience I have, I've come to the same conclusion:
     
     Just do the work you're supposed to do. It doesn't matter what anyone else thinks about it.
     
     Thanks, Derek.

193. Jenny Hill (2018-08-06) #

     Hi Derek, I love it, I love your writing. Is this the same book that you were writing for musicians? Or did I miss that the musicians book was finished? Thanks for all you do, being kind and honest in the world. J

194. Robin Morris (2018-08-06) #

     Love it - thanks for sharing Derek...!

195. Irina (2018-08-06) #

     I think that there is a great disconnect between optimization of life and what truly matters. We might optimize our life to the uttermost comfort and “success” but still feel empty by these achievements. The way I see this is because those achievements are being made from the outside rather than inside. We can’t go through life by living on the surface and expect enlightenment within. This is greatly contributed by what world reinforces and approves of, a quick solution, a stellar rise, an image of a hero. That is why I think that the world of true art will be a salvation for the world that wants to reinvent itself and find purpose in every stage of life, regardless of the perceived and collectively approved usefulness that purpose provides.

196. Christo (2018-08-06) #

     Hi Derek,
     Thank you for including me in this. Just my 5 cents worth.
     In over view I like it – confidence of conviction.
     Had the privilege of sitting down the FirstRand Namibia (5 year consecutive winner of the best Business bank awards won in South Africa) CEO (Sarel van Zyl) a couple of weeks back and asked him what advice he would have given himself at age 30? Know what he said... Actively learn, grow and apply. This confirms your first point.
     Currently reading one of the most read business books of times – “How to win friends and influence people”. The author, Dale Carnegie, needs no introduction and your conclusion is in line with his 3rd chapter speaking to connect with core desires. This basically entails the proven concept that intuition is regarded above intellect to impact others and present it in a mutually beneficial package. May sound a bit off the mark but if your read this chapter you will have a sound reference.
     Your third finding is quite interesting. I refer to one of our shared role models – Buffet, being the ultimate value investor in his contrarian approach. Zig when the crowds zag...
     One of my passions are investing and a very good book is The Acquirers Multiple which, amongst other, speaks to mean reversion and Van K Tharps book “Trade your way to financial freedom”. Here Tharp states that we will be wrong and should prepare for this. This book placed me very much in the phase of being scared of what I do know and even more so of what I do not know.
     
     I was fortunate to article under a very wise and seasoned auditor and he always said that all we do should be valued adding. I strive to do this every day.
     
     Last remark - Life, sports, business and investing principles seem to have more in common the older I get – hence the references here.
     
     Regards from Namibia.
     
     Christo

197. Carrie (2018-08-06) #

     Hi Derek,
     So glad to see a post from you! Great insight, as always. I love the last line the most. I know that I seek a legacy of being helpful, serving others, and always challenging my own assumptions of what I perceive to be true. If I'm not being useful to others, what am I here doing?
     
     Carrie

198. Stäni Steinbock (2018-08-06) #

     I'm quite happy that you got lucky with your company, b/c even if you sold it, you laid a good foundation to a company that still, thanks to you who founded it, seems to me to be one which I dare trust in this flood of "companies" etc who want to "help musicians".
     
     So: Thanks once more for that piece of work - it really is a contribution to all of us who make music on a small (or why not even a bigger one) scale. Don't feel like an idiot!
     
     Thanks for thinking about other people, too!
     
     (And yes, the company you once founded recently paid some money to me again, so thanks once again!)

199. Luke (2018-08-06) #

     This is interesting, and a lot to unpack. I’d like to hear more about why your previous work made you feel stupid, and how you relate to that feeling now that you’re sharing what you make. Do you still feel stupid, but so does everybody, so don’t let that stop you? Was the fear of being revealed as an amateur just something your perfectionist mind invented?

200. Line (2018-08-06) #

     Hi Derek,
     I am reading a book just now, (or rather, listening to an audiobook). Reading your post, I think you would find it interesting and useful too. It is called Work, Sex, Money - Real Life on the Path of Mindfullness by Chögyam Trungpa. Check it out. Wish you all the best!

201. Rosie Sherry (2018-08-06) #

     I often call myself lucky, whilst others look up to me. I still believe I'm just lucky, with some often boring hardwork sprinkled in.
     
     To add to the learning without doing...I love learning by doing. And the more I learn, the more I want to do, but I can't always find the time to do. So instead of doing I'm doing what I can to log things down so when the time is right and I can more easily do the things that I've learned about.

202. Andy Ludbrook (2018-08-06) #

     Thanks once again Derek! We are all searching for confidence in this "industry". This article lets us see that it's naturally there as part of the process of creation. Don't worry about it!

203. Bruce Peters (2018-08-06) #
204. Noreen Corkum (2018-08-06) #

     Oh my goodness Derek!
     Your words are excactly what I have experienced also. In fact for the
     past year I have to tell myself it is ok to be rather than doing doing doing.
     That does not mean I am a coach potatoe. What is means that I have givin myself permission to be present with my husband, children and grandchildren.
     
     Thank you for your writing.
     
     Have a blessed day!

205. Elizabeth Geyer (2018-08-06) #

     This article of yours turned up exactly as I was on the edge of realising it myself. I am going through a huge personal transition as I find my way back to why I wanted to make music in the first place. Along the way I became lost.. while doing music I nonetheless became slowly attached to the wrong goals and it has been a most painful humbling decade and I'm still finding my way back! But I think it has all been meant to be and was best for me. And you said the rest perfectly. Thank you so much Derek.

206. George Coutsoudis (2018-08-06) #

     Hey Derek,
     
     I really enjoyed reading this . We can easily be sucked into what actually validates 'true' success, and we strive for the epic. In reality it's very few who reach that stratosphere , and it's important to know that success is not only about the gargantuan feats.
     
     I do however feel that being happy enough with your own small and unique contribution to the world sits a lot easier if you have in fact reached the stars in the past.
     
     Keep well
     George

207. Hubert (2018-08-06) #

     "Learning without doing is wasted"
     
     Now that one really struck a chord.
     Pretty darn insightful read.

208. Mike Ambassador Bruny (2018-08-06) #

     You have just liberated some people with this message. A few things that came up for me was between confidence and contribution is courage. You had the courage to act. I'm not talking about courage with a capital "C". No you don't need to start there. Just a small step, a small "c", which the mere act transforms it into a big "C."
     
     My 2 cents.
     
     Peace.

209. ski (2018-08-06) #

     Without context, I am not sold. Confidence gives the okay to try something.
     
     Making progress is more important that simply "contribution" in my world.
     
     Perhaps as a portion of the new book it will all make sense?

210. Kwame (2018-08-06) #

     Great points

211. Sandy Stringfellow (2018-08-06) #

     People often tend - if they're paying attention - to learn more from their so-called failures than successes.
     
     Self-confidence can be essential to recover from our inevitable failures in life, whether personal or professional...not to mention faith in something greater than ourselves, as life is not superficial.
     
     The "doing" concept is important; over-thinking leads to a form of paralysis, creative and otherwise. If 10,00 hours didn't create anticipated success, try 20,000 hours. I especially enjoyed comments 113, 122, 123, 128, 133, 137, 158.
     
     Cheers.

212. Everett Adams (2018-08-06) #

     If anyone has a God given talent, they should try their best to share it with the world, but often the world tries to stop you by putting too many obstacles in the way, or too many charges in the way, so that only those with money or connections can be heard, not necessarily the most talented.

213. Vince Ponticelli (2018-08-06) #

     Great capture Derek. Very resonating I think. Through the years of not only work, but even personal life, I used to worry that every time I got uncomfortable, it meant I was inadequate, dumb, not worthy. I used to try to have an exterior of confidence, but in fact was very insecure about what I was experiencing. And it prevented me from grabbing that “uncomfort” as a golden opportunity to learn (very much to your point I think). Learning from my experiences as I started to understand better, I’ve continued to try to encourage others to “stretch, grow, learn”. Don’t strive to BE comfortable.... As soon as you sense you are, time to go get uncomfortable, that’s the only way you’ll continue to evolve (and in turn continue to be able to contribute)

214. Matt Cruz (2018-08-06) #

     All of your posts resonate with me but you really nailed it with this one. I think this happens to lots of people and they never even realize it. You could probably write an entire book about this idea alone.

215. Marlene Green (2018-08-06) #

     Look forward to your new book & a joy hearing from you. Totally disagree with your first bullet! I’ve invested time & money into learning many things only to discover that thing IS NOT for me and to learn more about myself and the other party or subject. Still valuable.
     
     I’ve gained priceless insights and wisdom from every abandoned project, business failure and broken relationship just as I’ve garnered the same from success with other business ventures & am proud to have nurtured deep long term relationships over decades.
     
     Years ago, I would beat myself up for wasting or spending time & money on XYZ but with calm & clarity over time I’ve realized that XYZ wasn’t good or right for me, or I missed out on a huge opportunity BUT life goes on and all is well. No Regrets! I keep moving forward with Curiosity & a Willingness to Learn new things and DO what works best for me....now that I KNOW ME BETTER.

216. Dawn Gardner (2018-08-06) #

     Hey Derek-
     
     These are gems!! Very insightful and real — I appreciate you sharing with me — and I am looking forward to more!

217. Lou (2018-08-06) #

     Now, this is thought-provoking, Derek: contribution vs confidence. I once said, "You don't create music to sit in a closet to play for yourself." I believe music is to be shared, contributed. However, van Gogh persisted in creating art which was not widely appreciated until he died. My niche, like his art, is not popular music. Mine is bold Christian based on the Scriptures. After decades of writing and sharing, my confidence in my contribution has grown, not because I am financially successful, but because my contribution has moved hearts and changed lives for the better. Ditch the confidence. Find what you can do best. Then, do it.

218. Pete Fegredo (2018-08-06) #

     Hi Derek,
     Good to hear from you. Some time ago you said "If something scares the life out of you but, excites you? DO IT! Keep doing what you're doing. We will appreciate whatever you discover.

219. Peter Santenello (2018-08-06) #

     Thanks for the details into your world Derek! Great point about learning without doing. It's the difference between being passive and active. I'm looking forward to your book :).
     
     Peter

220. Greg S (2018-08-06) #

     I'm not so sure... Everyone is at different stages in their lives and that can affect the degree to which we are confident (or over confident). I would not use the term "dumb luck". If 100 people had been in the position you were at that time in their lives, how many of them would have had the vision to start up the companies that you started up? Luck may play a part but in the end, as you say, we need to do something.
     
     That bit, I fully agree... we must do something with what we know if anything is to be achieved in this world. It doesn't matter if it's big or small, commercial or helping others. There is no place for selfishness, but there is place for confidence.

221. Meghan (2018-08-06) #

     I'm glad you contribute what you do, and that you pay attention to being useful and concise. Through introspection we learn a lot about the world and sharing those revelations without adding a lot of confusing language allows others to easily absorb one's message and reflect on them. Your first point seems incomplete. If you really don't want to waste your knowledge, it should be shared, for example on your blog or in a book or in a conversation. The second point is correct, but mostly because people aren't capable of judging you for who you are, as we are only capable of knowing ourselves. Our reactions and judgements are simply us regurgitating our own perceptions and self-image, and therefore by definition, isn't about the other person at all, really. You say it doesn't matter how we feel. I don't agree. Our emotions are important, and should be recognized by ourselves, though of course, few others need to know. Though I think what you mean is that taking our attention off of how we feel others are perceiving us, eliminating the "what are they thinking about what I'm doing/feeling?" thoughts allows us to concentrate on the work, and therefore produces higher-quality work.

222. Jerry Bresee (2018-08-06) #

     Your thoughts line up for me with a quote that a musician friend of mine posted, and which I quickly wrote down: “Don’t let what you can’t yet do keep you from doing what you can do.” He was posting about jazz improvisation but I took it to heart as a life lesson. Time to be up and doing.

223. Patrick (2018-08-06) #

     Very interesting, reads well!

224. Chris Lasko (2018-08-06) #

     Derek, I like the article but don’t you need a little bit of that confidence to put stuff out in the world. Confidence overcomes the fear.

225. Ewen Munro (2018-08-06) #

     I love your take on just making your contribution to the world. I've been thinking about this a lot lately, more specifically, what really matters when you create a piece of work. Does it really matter whether or not you become rich from your piece of work? Or is it about the impact you create? Really, the answers to these sort of questions are different for everyone, but to think about these questions helps us to gain clarity as to why we're doing what we're doing.
     
     The only nugget that I'd like to mention is how you wrote under the This Isn't About Me thought, concerning the line "How I feel in this moment doesn't matter." I understand what you mean by this. Pain passes. And a moment of pain doesn't define an entire person's life, or at least, it shouldn't. But I would like to emphasise that how we feel determines how we live. Think about when we make a decision. We can have all of the information in the universe at our disposal and yet, we can't know what will happen in the future, we can only imagine the future. And because of this, we always make a decision based on what we feel will give us the best outcome; hence, how we feel determines how we live. And with the line in question, all I'm suggesting is that you rewrite the line in such a way that still expresses the same meaning that you'd like to convey, but at the same time, doesn't devalue feelings.
     
     But despite that one nugget, this article did resonate with me and made me think about confidence in a way that I have never really considered it -- as a potential flaw I mean.
     
     Thanks for you contribution, Derek.

226. don (2018-08-06) #

     good one

227. Mizzy (2018-08-06) #

     Love this! Thank you Derek..... I always learn something from you.

228. John Higgins (2018-08-06) #

     David Foster Wallace — 'You will become way less concerned with what other people think of you when you realize how seldom they do.'

229. Clay Steadman (2018-08-06) #

     Derek,
     I really love your work and your contribution to the world. You don't need confidence, just contribution is really well done, and I am sure It is still difficult to put yourself out like this and I appreciate you seeking feedback. I like the concept here that confidence is not needed, I believe this is a common excuse for people and I believe this will help them understand that it is not necessary.
     
     I have a couple thoughts on this. I like how succinct it is but it might be too succinct for me. I fall into the trap of learning instead of doing too. I am currently in the path now, I think I will always be in some aspects of life. This idea itself could be it’s own book, it kind of is with Steven Pressfield’s War of Art and his newest one Artists Journey. It might be worth expanding on this concept from your prospective in here for those that don’t know this concept.
     
     I often think about what you have said before: if more information is all we needed we would all be billionaires with six packs (or something close to this). Also Tony Robbins has said: it’s not what you know it’s what you do consistently. This might be something you want to emphasize in the ‘learning without doing is wasted’ paragraph.
     
     Have you ever seen the benefit in “not knowing.” I believe there is great power in knowing that you don’t know things for sure. It takes the ego and pride out and helps you contribute while keeping an open mind. It’s not what you don’t know that will hurt you it’s what you know for sure that just ain’t so.
     
     I appreciate the opportunity to contribute to your work.
     
     Thank you,
     Clay Steadman

230. Peter (2018-08-06) #

     I needed that.

231. Rob D (2018-08-06) #

     Excellent post, Derek!

232. Ben Landers (2018-08-06) #

     "Learning without doing is wasted"
     
     YES! This is a trap I can fall into very easily as well.
     
     I love to learn, sometimes I spend so much time learning that I don't have the margin to implement the things I need to take action on.
     
     I've found it's more helpful to start with the action and then learn what you need to along the way to keep the wheels moving.
     
     P.S. "Hell Yea, or No" is one of my favorite concepts from your last book, so looking forward to checking out the new one - Thanks Derek!

233. Henk Milne (2018-08-06) #

     Hi Derek:
     Reading this before work on a Monday morning. About to show it to my wife, as I often do. I have found your thoughts very useful in my life. Pithy. Insightful. You are very clearly growing as an individual - and helping others grow, too. Putting what you have learnt to good use?
     Keep it up!
     Henk

234. François (2018-08-06) #

     I often fell into "Learning without doing". Learning new things is a joy in itself for me. Using this knowledge to contribute is an even greater joy.
     
     My challenge is all around selection and focus. Which one of all these new paths will I choose to put my energy in and to produce what work?
     
     I'd like to know how you sort it out.
     
     Thanks :)

235. Will (2018-08-06) #

     Spot on Derek. I have been through the exact same thing! And having gone through it I have come to realize that when you are young...you have blinders on. They keep you safe and gregarious. Once you grow up a little you find out that there are others in this world that can do exactly what you can. But I have also come to realize that while they may be better than me at a specific task..I can deliver it better. Or maybe they can deliver it better and I am better at marketing mine. Like you say Derek...there will always be something that will set you apart. If there isn't..find the thing that does! If it is your passion...you won't stop u till you do.

236. José (2018-08-06) #

     Hi Derek,
     
     during my last holidays I listened to your book "Anything you want". I enjoyed it a lot and it inspired me to prune a bit my overflowing list of things to do and learn.
     
     On the current subject I have similar views but there are some cases where things don't seem so clear-cut to me.
     
     There are some subjects to learn where it may not matter at all if it makes any immediate difference to the outside world. I am a mathematician by education, but not by profession, so while I am programming to make my customers happy and sustain my family, I spend a lot of time learning about Mathematics and Physics. I hope my children will take interest at some point, but even if not, I am really satisfied widening my horizon.
     
     It's a bit like drinking wine or listening to music or painting, it may not matter to anyone else how much time and effort you put in it, but it may satisfy you deeply.
     
     But maybe I threw a too wide net here, maybe it's more about the profession that provides the livelihood than anything else. Or maybe it's not, maybe I should use all of my spare time to help others and I am just being hedonistic. But learning these (currently) useless things just makes me happy...
     
     In any case, I am very curious about your new book project!
     
     Best regards
     José

237. Doris Spears (2018-08-06) #

     Thanks for this spot on insight to the breathing dead.

238. Frank Tuma (2018-08-06) #

     You are so right. When I got out of the Universities that I attended in the fields of Physics and engineering I felt that I learned one most important thing. That one thing was, I didn't know much of anything. That became very obvious as I worked and learned. As time changed most of those things that I had learned earlier changed as well and it's still changing as technology is changing so very fast.

239. Brad Peterson (2018-08-06) #

     There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio
     
     I like what I'm reading, Derek

240. Troy Farkas (2018-08-06) #

     This isn't about me. I think that's something we can all take away from this. Thanks for sharing, Derek.

241. Laurie (2018-08-06) #

     Somewhere along my travels I was challenged by something I read to remove the word "should" from my vocabulary regarding myself or others. The kinder more realistic option became the word "could". You could try it too...or not.

242. colin michael (2018-08-06) #

     This is an important point that will help us get unstuck if we remember it. When we are not doing something, creating something, we are robbing the world of the unique things that only we can give it. I've given up creating for recognition. It is nice to be recognized, but if I were to wait for that I'd get little done. I need to create because I can and because that is all that will be left of me when I am gone. Create, share, repeat.
     
     Thanks for putting this out there and for being transparent enough to tell those of us who've never had that stroke of dumb luck that you're just like us ;-)

243. John Michael Domingo (2018-08-06) #

     The most impactful part of this for me was about how learning without doing is wasted. With so much info in the world, it's easy to do nothing but intake information. But if we aren't doing anything with the new info right now, then why have it? If we will need it "someday", we can just learn it then.
     
     Question for you Derek, would you say this post follows your "one idea" method of writing?

244. Jayne Olderman (2018-08-06) #

     I agree with Adam Cole (2018-08-06). This entry did not resonate with me, either. I have always looked up to you because what you have done works. You did trial & error to figure out what does NOT work in order to figure out what DOES and then, you generously share it with us! As for you judging yourself to be right or wrong or too confidant? I do not know if this is an accurate assessment and I do not want to hear that anyway. We know you are humble and we love you for it, but, you are a success because you earned it! Period! Just look at what you have created! CDBaby has changed my life! What a legacy! Own it, Derek! You are awesome! You've adapted as things changed and you choose to share THAT with us as well! And, btw, as always, THANK YOU!

245. Sal Di Stefano (2018-08-06) #

     Refreshingly anti-guru. Thank you.

246. Kaela (2018-08-06) #

     Sometimes confidence help u to move forward but it doesn't make anyone perfect and we all have to understand that.
     
     I agree that learning without doing wastes learning and so always try to find a personal project I could use my newly learnt skills. It helps to reinforce the learning.
     
     Your public persona is stil you. It is just a small part of you in a short period of time. Still you.
     
     Big Magic by Elizabeth Gilbert talks about showing up even when the work is not a masterpiece.

247. Karen Lindridge (2018-08-06) #

     Thank you again. Your writings always help me to reflect. This one fits so well with my current thinking and other stuff I am reading.
     Another post I may use for staff training...contributions, contribute, contribute.

248. Jeff Reger (2018-08-06) #

     Derek.
     
     Thanks for including me in this. I stole something from someone much smarter than me years ago and your post made me think of it. He told me that “ignorance and certainty are a terrible combination so admit that you often don’t know and be at peace with that uncertainty.”
     
     Like many people I love your philosophy on business and it’s so refreshing to hear people express doubt about what they’re doing or how they’re doing it. If you listen to the “experts”, success is preordained if you just meditate every morning or do Pilates after work with your personal trainer.
     
     My philosophy (if you can call it that) is very similar to yours..try some shit, see if it works and if yes...keep doing it. If not, don’t be too proud to admit that your idea sucked and hit the reset button.
     
     Thanks and good luck on the book.

249. Tophher Keene (2018-08-06) #

     Beautiful post Derek, I can 100% relate on worrying that the quality of your work reveals your ignorance and stupidity to a world that assumes you're a genius, it's terrifying to risk shattering their illusion.
     
     "Better to keep your mouth closed and let people think you are a fool than to open it and remove all doubt"
     
     But it's okay, we're ALL fools, we're ALL frauds, and we're all trying our best. Make something. Put it out there. You are making a difference, Derek, you've inspired me and many of my students, and clearly thousands and thousands of others around the world. Thank you for your contribution and for being willing to look like a fool in the process.

250. Rob Duquette (2018-08-06) #

     Beautifullly said!! I can't wait for the book!!!
     
     It makes me think about a song I sing for K-5rs....."I just need to be myself", and I repeat it a few times because so much of THIS comes down to THAT - believing that our uniqueness is what gives us our place in the world.
     
     Thanks for being YOU.

251. Kristy Landgren (2018-08-06) #

     And contribution builds confidence, wouldn’t you say? Making ourselves useful to others is empowering and gratifying! Thanks for the insight, Derek.

252. Deon Braun (2018-08-06) #

     This post is so in line with how I've been experiencing my own creativity the past 5-6 years.
     
     A multisport magazine I founded in 2003 had to be scuttled in 2013 when the South African market changed, and bike companies chose to support publications that were more niche. A tough lesson at the time, and very easy to take personally. What did I do wrong? How could I have avoided this disaster? The questions went on and on. Really humbling. Much needed too.
     
     Fortunately, with time comes healing. And a deeper understanding of how temporal everything we produce is.
     
     I think that what matters is to be of value to others for the moments that are Now, and to ensure we remain true to ourselves while doing so.
     
     A great post Derek, thanks for sharing in your inimitable way.

253. lorenzo (2018-08-06) #

     just like all of us you had no control on how you were acting/thinking then and/or now or the future for that matter. it is all part of the journey. every little thing prepares us for the next. you wouldn't be who you are today without being naive at first, etc... of course the brilliant part is that you have developed the emotional intelligence/awareness to recognize all of this.
     as far as acting on the learning, it could be summarized in your famous quote:”if all we needed was knowledge, we would all be billionaires with a six pack” (I am paraphrasing).
     and I live by that. but at the same time I am not sure if the rest is a chapter for a book or a “note to self”.

254. Noah Budin (2018-08-06) #

     I really enjoy your insight and have, over the years, been inspired, and gleaned (and used!) some great information.
     
     But, here's a question. Or maybe an observation. (I won't know until I've written it.
     
     What I know about the public you is that you started a company and sold it for (presumably) a lot of money. You also seem to tread lightly on the earth. You don't use up a lot of resources and your expenses are probably relatively small (though I have no way of knowing that for sure).
     
     Not all of us, and I'll say probably most of us, were not as lucky to have sold a large business so as to have a significant financial cushion to just go out and create what we love. I'd love to do that, but I'm not able. Some of that is luck, much of it is my own ability or inability, or willingness, to be a better financial manager of my own resources. I recognize that. I understand that my own choices are what drive my lifestyle.
     
     So, I work the proverbial day job (which I actually really like), and still make time for my creative endeavors. But, oh, how I would love to have the luxury of feeling free from financial burden just to be able to pursue my own art and business opportunities. Doesn't that aspect of it play into your being able to just do your own, unique work without fear of failure?

255. Rafik (2018-08-06) #

     I think you have a point, saying that being blindly arrogant and naive, believing you're right without ever looking at the alternatives.
     
     However, when you say that the most important thing is contribution, not confidence, I strongly disagree, and here's why : You could be extremely successful but without the proper mindset, you'll never be confident.
     
     While I agree that you should make a contribution, a healthy level of belief in yourself even when sometimes there is no proof supporting it, is essential to your overall happiness.

256. Brian Beatty (2018-08-06) #

     Great article...it seems very similar to Seth Godin's ideas related to "Ship It". How can you craft these ideas to stand apart and unique from Seth's? Or do you think they are dissimilar?
     
     Onward!

257. Edward Panas (2018-08-06) #

     Great article! I've been doing some career experimentation the past few years and a couple recent health issues with close family members has snapped me out of my ego and back into reality.
     
     Really like the 2nd and 3rd bullet points, but I don't agree with the 1st, though I understand the point you're making. I have a few topics (like music for example) that I have loved learning about my entire life, but I lack any ability to create music and have no interest in doing anything productive with it other than enjoying it. That may be more about appreciation than functional knowledge, but I enjoy studying about the artists and genres and despite my love of the art form, I have no intention of putting my knowledge to use.
     
     Can't wait to read more of your book as it progresses. Thanks for sharing Derek!

258. Belem (2018-08-06) #

     Wow!
     I can totally relate to what you wrote, it was like reading about myself, not everything but especially about what I call false confidence, a lady in Oregon said that and ever since I haven't forgotten.
     Also about learning more, my father is an alcoholic so my coping mechanisms have been working and studying. Instead of drinking or doing drugs I study, yet lately I have been stuck. I am thinking on learning some type of art or work where I can use my hands to create...at the en of the day, thankfully I finally realized that I studied engineering to have some structure and to please my parents....or to take their anger.... it didn't work out....

259. Joseph de Dominicis (2018-08-06) #

     Live and learn.
     Best

260. Ron Poole (2018-08-06) #

     You are experiencing the process of getting older - and wisdom is coming into your life. And the saying "Nobody cares how much you know till they know how much you care" plays perfectly into your scenario. You are fortunate Derek - you were able to achieve success, (and it was more than just luck), while many, probably most people never reach the levels their dreams perceive for them. Your article is very meaningful and a great guide for all of us to follow.

261. Pete (2018-08-06) #

     I'm stuck right now, for those reasons, and for just being old. Can I just stop trying so hard now? I'm tired.

262. Eric (2018-08-06) #

     Hi Derek - you asked for feedback.
     I am not a grammar spaz and I have always struggled with editing but love to do it.
     
     "Years ago, I was so confident, and so naive." - either delete both commas or the one after confident.
     
     "I was so sure that I was right and everyone else was wrong." -i would cut out the 'so' here because you use 'so' twice in the proceeding sentence - it does make you sound whiny which if you want then keep it.
     
     "...I realized how little I knew, and how dumb-lucky I had been." - you can delete this comma.
     
     "...felt ready to do something new, and started to learn. " - you dont need the comma but my question is why did you start to learn to do something new? In this format I can see that you can click on your book reviews but is that how you do something new, read books on bettering yourself? I am sure you do other actions besides just that.
     
     How did reading (maybe more than reading) make you feel like an idiot?
     
     " ...but then see how stupid they revealed me to be, so I’d stop." are you saying here that your ideas /fledgling creations looked so weak or feeble that it in turn made you look 'stupid'? Its not entirely clear to me.
     
     Point 1 is very true - I dont know about throwing the food in the trash as an example - how is that bad? should I eat it all if I am full, compost it? I look at my cousin who was on track with 1 book read per day and of all the books he read the only ones he implemented were Wim Hof's book and a fasting book. Then the next violation was that he only shared what he was doing with those that knew about the books he read never sharing that info with the masses. If you stick to the food rendition letting food expire with out using it, not having a garden when you have the means... wasted resources like how sometimes I find plastic and aluminum in a trash can next to a recycle bin!!!
     
     This isnt about me section is a little confusing - it doesnt feel like you have built up your ego enough that you can be humble here - and it feels disjointed not like the previous point where there is relief to the frustration.
     
     I like your last point - I am not sure how you are going to tie this into your book with out the links. I learned about counter melody from some musicians - they always hummed that instead of the melody - it was like the fat that held the meat together.
     
     I dont believe your last two lines. I love to read what you write however you asked for feedback.
     You say you are glad old confidence is gone because you thought you were right and great and that it was all a contest. It feels like you are trying to cut this short and give a standard answer. From what I have read of you I would think that your new confidence has consumed your old confidence and this has finally allowed you to become a teacher - teachers always learn the most in any situation because they usually do all the heavy lifting. As for thinking you were great I dont get that impression from you - it seems like it was always about feeding your own hunger and in doing so you forgot to bring other with you.
     
     and when it comes to how you plan to aim your work, you dont get to choose to make your work unique and useful - I guess you can try but it is ultimately up to the reader not you. What I see you are doing is writing for yourself now and you are sharing your thoughts with us. The useful part is for us to read it and apply it, share it, junk it, store it, whatever- maybe this is where your confidence is now - in the people (humanity) instead of yourself.
     
     If this is too much let me know.
     
     thanks

263. Bill Thurman (2018-08-06) #

     Hi Derek! Thanks for your post. I have also had my share of dumb luck, being naive and getting stuck completely. We can't learn everything, even in living a million years. But we can still learn, read, and watch others do their work/play as well as do our own for the rest of our short lives. All the best for you and the new book!

264. Mike Dannheim (2018-08-06) #

     At first, this read like a personal reflection. Then I came to realize that this isn't a note to you, this is a manifesto on how to live a rich life.

265. essence (2018-08-06) #

     My Dad used to say ‘The more you know the more you realize how little you know.’ It sounds to me like you’ve lost your ego and blind confidence. It sounds to me like you are coming from a place of service now. Your humility and persistence are inspiring. Your honesty is engaging and I relate to your transformation. Your words are comforting to me.
     
     I’ve had 4 major label deals and a lot of mini big breaks but the big one hasn’t come yet. Maybe it will still. Maybe not. The odds are against me as I age even though my songs are gaining depth and accessibility through heartbreaks and life experience. But I do have discovered the benefit of letting go. The girl who once was most likely to become a pop star is now dedicated to just writing songs from the heart for whoever will listen. My goal has changed from becoming a global superstar to making a respectable living and supporting my kids and myself as a single Mom living in San Francisco (most expensive city in the world) with my music on my own independent terms. That to me is the definition of success. Doing what I love and sharing it with my community, my tribe. And the most important part for me is being present each moment because the spark leads me in a different direction each day if I tune in and really listen and don’t try to control the process. That’s how the best art is made.
     
     Last year my voice student came down with ALS and could no longer speak or sing. He wanted to make an album of his songs before he dies and he asked me to be his voice. I put melody and music to his words with a couple ofther collaborators and I we released his album in February of this year. I never could have planned this and it wasn’t my vision ofor myself but it’s turned into my most meanful creative venture yet. We will be performing a Tiny Desk Concert in DC in October. I tell you this story to illustrate the power of serving. This album is adding meaning and value to the end of life for my student. It’s his musical and life legacy. And I am merely an instrument to serve his vision. Now when I release my own next record it will have a different weight and depth to it that would not otherwise have been possible.
     
     Thanks Derek for being the unique genius you are. Follow the spark.

266. Jared Cutright (2018-08-06) #

     I really liked it.
     
     Your speaking of the public persona reminds of a quote by Dr Wayne Dyer. He said “I have a thousand reputations in every audience”.

267. Nick (2018-08-06) #

     Dunning–Kruger effect
     
     Also, some actionable examples would be helpful for future guidance. For example, of something learnt and then an appropriate example of doing. Do you mean one should do a project with the new knowledge? or write a paper about the new knowledege?

268. Jack Perricone (2018-08-06) #

     Derek,
     
     There seems like to be contradictions in your essay. E.g: “This isn’t about me” /“ It doesn't matter if it is a masterpiece or not, as long as I enjoy it”.
     Confidence is directly connected to our emotions and our emotions cause us to act. So what you seem to be indicating is that you now have regained the confidence to state what you believe. Congratulations! I look forward to hearing your thoughts.
     
     Jack

269. Adler Scout (2018-08-06) #

     Very thoughtful including the collection of articles linked to this one ☺ Thank you.
     Loved the reflection about the 'public/real me'. It feels like freedom to contribute, create, publish the best we can without being worried about the 'feedback'.
     
     By chance I saw your tweet about the book you have just read (https://sive.rs/book/Disliked) and got the book. WOW!! This is mind-blowing! Some timely. Thank you for sharing it. This is improving a lot of aspects in my life from what I'm trying to implement. I'd love to dig more into Albert Adler's work!! It feels like I'm in a new world now ☺ Big thank you Derek.

270. Rod Wilson (2018-08-06) #
271. Brent (2018-08-06) #

     Hmmm... another "Sivers moment" I see, taking a concept that most of us constantly chase after, "confidence", and turning it on its head. Nicely done. I suppose finding balance with most everything in life is where the sweet spot is, but it is refreshing to see this side of the confidence argument. Thanks Derek. I definitely support the encouragement to do something with what we learn, especially when it may help others somehow, but learning is an important part of "being" for me, whether I do anything with it or not. You wrote about the benefits of staying focussed on "being", not "having" months ago, and I found this advice very helpful. Again, thank you. Definitely looking forward to the release of your upcoming books.

272. Paul (2018-08-06) #

     Learning is not to be confused with taking in information. Taking in information is not learning something, it’s just learning about something you probably don’t know yet.
     
     True learning is happening through taking action and experience.
     
     By writing this comment I learned that I should write my thoughts into my notes app first and copy and paste it on the website later if I don’t want to risk loosing what I already have written.

273. Ivaylo Durmonski (2018-08-06) #

     I should remind myself the things you're mentioning here. You're absolutely right about all of the points. Thanks for sharing! When we can expect your book?

274. Lucio Vuotto (2018-08-06) #

     As long as trying is cheap or free.
     I try to learn before take some risks.

275. Rhett Palmer (2018-08-06) #

     It’s called humility. When I interviewed Rev Billy Graham I
     I broached the subject of humility. He leaned into my space gently
     And softy said “ We’ll Rhett, if we are talking about it we haven’t got it”
     I have run into those who are arrogant having been robbed
     of the learning anvil because they inherited wealth.
     I have quite a few Billionaires as true close friends.
     They have an Innate tenderness and compassion
     and empathy. I can see in my later years why they found favor with the Lord above. Perhaps you haven’t reached the Pointe where you
     have come to the revelation that there is a God and thank God you are not Him. It was a revelation to me and the burden of running the world was
     Suddenly off my shoulders. Yo

276. Ruben Kenig (2018-08-06) #

     This is interesting to read. My experience with music was almost this in reverse, or perhaps more accurately, this without the successful bit. How to take information like this and make it kinetic is the trick. So much information is subjective.
     
     It makes me think of a story about Leonard Bernstein giving a masterclass (it may have been at Tanglewood) where he told all the student conductors that the most important thing was restraint. They worked all day on conducting with restraint, keeping still and giving cues in a measured way. This was very hard for most of them and everyone was looking forward to seeing Bernstein himself put these principles into action.
     
     That night he conducted Symphonic Dances from West Side Story and he was leaping about, making huge gestures and almost falling off the podium in his visible enthusiasm. It seemed that Bernstein was giving the young conductors the advice he thought he needed (perhaps subconsciously).
     
     This is not to say that anything like this is necessarily happening here now, but reading this did bring that story to mind.

277. Mare (2018-08-06) #

     Nice article Derek - Life, love and time (If we’re lucky enough to have it) are our biggest teachers💜

278. Liz Deacle (2018-08-06) #

     nobody is judging me because nobody is thinking about me.
     You don't know how valuable those few words were to me today - so there you go. You've made someone's day better and that in itself is success x

279. Ian Kendrick (2018-08-06) #

     Hey Derek
     I’ll be brutally honest as I know that’s what you’d like... it does come across as an apology for how you used to be. ( although it probably isn’t ) From what I know of you, you have a passion and curiosity for life, and it shines through. You interpret life in a way many wouldn’t and I would love think I have a similar outlook. I read a phrase recently that said “ to know if your beliefs are true you have to look if the path you are on will take you to your goal.”
     I truly hope your path leads to your goal.
     
     Ever inspired
     
     Ian

280. Jonathan Wilson (2018-08-06) #

     A useful countermelody for the big orchestra of life..... that is worth expanding on !!😉 always love your stuff Derek! ( might actually put that one up on the marker board for a while )
     
     My experience is more on a nano scale compared to what you did with cdbaby. I am known (mostly unknown) by a few for a instrument that is heard by many (guitar formatted violas - called “GuitarViols” that you hear in a lot of movies , TV, video game scores). Basically a subtle yet profound additive to the Musical Soundtrack ecology. A tiny market but I pretty much service most all of it! Thank you for your inspiration over the years Derek. Keep writing!
     
     Anyway thought I’d say hi.

281. Lana (2018-08-06) #

     Great article, Derek. Ignorant confidence replaced by wisdom is not a bad shift in life lol "I continued learning until I felt like an absolute idiot," was my favorite sentence and made me chuckle. The wiser we get the more we realize that we don't know anything. All we can do is share our unique gifts for the sake of others, and you keep on reminding us about that. Thumbs up.

282. RaVen (2018-08-06) #

     I've been preaching this all my life to others who lament, 'I just need confidence." I keep reminding them, "You just need to DO and practice until you improve."
     Thanks for chiming in! Now I can send this out to others, because they don't believe me unless it comes from another expert. :)

283. Ellen Lebowitz (2018-08-06) #

     Meanings of words are important. I don't think what you had was confidence. Perhaps it was a form of arrogance, which i would define as false confidence that is not based in wisdom, but rather based on externals like ambition, self identity, ego. Wisdom, which is inherent, creates confidence because then what you're confident in is not your "self", or your self separate from others, or your EGO; but what you're confident in is a direct experience of what is true. Everything beneficial flows from that. Love flows from that. Conditioning and the life-long habits we learn move us away from that intrinsic wisdom. Hence, the path is to learn what we need to cultivate and what we need to abandon to unwind the conditioning, the habitual patterns which cause confusion which causes unhappiness and suffering. Meditation recommended.

284. Jim Zachar (2018-08-06) #

     Hello Derek,
     You hit my problem right on the head. I learn, but don’t apply it. Sometimes I just jump in without the manual and get frustrated. Then I learn again but don’t follow thru. I’m not sure if I’m afraid of getting noticed, or afraid of failure. It’s been my shortfall for my entire life. Maybe now that I’m getting older I’ll get in that “who gives a fuck” mood and finally get something done. As always I enjoy your thoughts.

285. Kelli (2018-08-06) #

     I love this post Derek -- I'm guessing many of us have had similar experiences along our respective journeys; I know that I have. I'm also a resource to help you get unstuck; if that's of any interest just PM me. Thanks for sharing this!!

286. J.J. Vicars (2018-08-06) #

     Good point, though not quite the way I would use the word "confidence". When we're young we're more cocky than confidant, especially if we lack real confidence. As we get older, if we've really LIVED our lives rather than just existing as a passive cog in the machine, we mature and come to understand how little we really know and our false or weak confidence erodes to be replaced by a stronger confidence based on deeper insight and understanding. This is what 'growing up" is and it happens many times in many ways throughout a person's life.

287. Terry Kingston (2018-08-06) #

     Derek,
     
     We get stuck creatively and it leads to frustration, but more importantly to self-reflection and the realization that "it's not about me" to humility and maybe to wisdom. A few years ago, I would not have said this, thinking I sound slightly stupid. You get the gist.

288. Ben (2018-08-06) #

     Does your work even have to be useful?
     
     I shared a couple of pints of Guinness with 3 travelling French academics last week, whose scientific and mathematical work was so esoteric that they abandoned trying to explain it to me before really even beginning. They fully acknowledged that their work had no obvious practical application but I'm really happy that there are people in the world who are applying their skills and intellects to things that may not be obviously useful - it gives me a warm glow of wonder about our world!
     
     Thanks for the thought-provoking article, Derek. I suspect that your definition of useful may stretch to accommodate my French friends...

289. Wyeth Stiles (2018-08-06) #

     Thanks Derek,
     I can really relate to this and have spent many hours learning, sometimes only to realize that I don't know what to do with the knowledge I've gained. For me, now, it's not so much about acquiring knowledge as finding your way...and not giving up. Thanks again for the really insightful and apropos post!

290. David Cohen (2018-08-06) #

     I find this very refreshing. I've met many folks who have had success, but seem incapable of acknowledging that luck may have been a factor. It's as if admitting that there was luck involved somehow diminishes their hard work or personal brilliance. Yet I've also met many brilliant people who have worked hard, sought expertise, and gave it all they had, but did not succeed due to things like health issues, bad market timing, overhyped or even just shifting technologies, sabotage, etc. Luck is always an element - that doesn't mean sit around and wait for a lucky break, but just don't take it for granted when the breaks are going your way.

291. Trmzbtrish (2018-08-06) #

     Learning without doing I think can be expanded a bit. You will never discover anything new without trying and learning and adapting and trying and learning more. It’s a process. Additionally, learning without application could lead to learning something “wrong” and you won’t even know it! Or you find out in a critical moment rather than when a hiccup won’t impact as much. Like trying your knowledge the first time to jump a car when it won’t move on an abandoned road in winter versus in your driveway.
     
     Just some thoughts.

292. Jon (2018-08-06) #

     Always love reading your posts Derek. Looking forward to reading your new book!

293. KK (2018-08-06) #

     This is absolute gold: "How I feel in this moment doesn’t matter — it will pass. Nobody is judging me, because nobody is thinking of me. They are just looking for things to improve their own life." When I get stuck in my head, afraid to take action, the thought that liberates me is that I'm insignificant. People are too busy to render judgement. They are caught up in their own lives and drama and needs and desires. Even if I make a fool of myself, their attention will simply shift to the next fool.

294. Lisa DeLay (2018-08-06) #

     It's Parker J. Palmer who likes to say "Fear causes paralysis" in his book "Courage to Teach. He has often taught teachers and the same is true for any of us. Students who are fearful about failing or trying something get stuck. Teachers who feel threatened or out of their depth or stressed out get stuck...and all of us will be paralyzed by our fear.
     
     He mentions that asking ourselves questions and then moving right through the fear - rather then staying blind to it or avoiding it- is the only way to have real courage and to really know ourselves. What wise words!
     
     Thanks for sharing what your journey is like.

295. Ray (2018-08-06) #

     Wasn't it Socrates who said The more I learn, the more I realize how little I know? Or something to that effect... Blessed be the ignorance of youth.
     
     In my 30s, I was given the chance to be a show runner a few times and I managed to deliver on time and on budget. The key factor was surrounding myself with good people both behind and in front of the camera. We were doing "low budget" productions. Little did I realize the industry shift that was coming.
     
     So I guess my point is a lot depends on the "times" and the team. I get your point about contributing - what you can - today. Truth be told I look back and I'm happy I had the chance to do it.
     
     It's time for some introspection and figure out what I can contribute tomorrow.

296. cezar (2018-08-06) #

     Definitely resonates, but with the ”unique” stuff sounds meta. Doesn’t seem actionable.

297. Glenn Douglas Reid (2018-08-06) #

     Well done, Derek. I wouldn't change a word. Exellent insight. I will buy that book when you're done. When I wrote my book it took 2 and 1/2 years and constant re-writes. It's an arduous journey, but worthwhile if you help others by the writing. I think you will do so.

298. Mark Badenhoff (2018-08-06) #

     I appreciate your candor, and counterintuitive thinking. Most would say finding success early isn't unlucky. Early success is nice, but can be a trap. Realizing you don't know what you don't know is wise. Curiosity and courage to act, opens doors we didn't think we we're capable of walking through.

299. billy (2018-08-06) #

     love you derek #impermanence #yolo

300. Annah Meintzer (2018-08-06) #

     I love your point about learning without doing is a waste. It's good to think about all the things I have spent time one that deserve to be utilized and put to action! Thanks for sharing

301. Kellie OConnor (2018-08-06) #

     That’s a lovely piece of writing and very useful.

302. Mo (2018-08-06) #

     To me this is about finding the balance between having an ego that kicks in so you set a higher standard and an ego that gets in the way of getting things done.

303. John (2018-08-06) #

     You've been reading my life story mail!
     
     Favorite quote: "I’d start to make things, but then see how stupid they revealed me to be, so I’d stop. I lost all confidence. I spent a few years completely stuck."
     
     Love that you are so vulnerable/successful!
     
     John

304. Cindy Grayson (2018-08-06) #

     I have never thought that what I did was worthy of great praise. I quit going to the University my 2 nd year because my classes in art didn't seem challenging enough. I spent years doing menial jobs until the last 9 years when I started playing my music for money. My art also started to take off and people I'd known for years seemed amazed at my detailed, realistic artwork and gourd carving. The music is making more steady money so art has been out on the back burner. My family has never been tremendously supportive because they are all career people with degrees but I'm finally getting support from friends and I don't know how to act except to say thank you. There is so much about the world of self employment that I have yet to learn that I get overwhelmed at times but , yes, I feel like I know nothing a lot. I guess you keep at it and try not to drown in what you don't know ....yet?

305. Bayberry Shah (2018-08-06) #

     I connected with "Learning without doing is time wasted." I have certainly done a whole lot of that. I have recently been working on an art show idea based on my interest in early human art. Time to put my learning into action. Plus, this is forcing me to completely let go of worrying whether the individual paintings are sell-able or not. The concept and the exhibition experience as a whole is the focus. This is liberating. I am going to enjoy the next couple of years building this dream and enjoy the process.
     Best of luck with your next chapter.

306. Bill (2018-08-06) #

     The best post you’ve had in a while!
     Very useful!
     Good blessings to you in your continued journey.
     
     Cheers!
     Bill
     www.billwestmusic.com

307. Jane Carter (2018-08-06) #

     Good start, but I'd like to see you get a little more granular. What do you mean by "stupid"? How did you know the things you were starting were revealing stupidity?
     *I'm all for imperfect action, and I think sometimes things reveal themselves to be useful much later, rather than necessarily finding a way to *make* them useful.
     Good stuff; thanks for getting me thinking this morning :)
     Jane Carter

308. karl grambo (2018-08-06) #

     Been in a stuck place myself some action for my songs on apple etc cdbaby has got me played and some performance royalty checks , glad you got that going ,still impacting me and a lot of other semi pro hobbyists , " weird angle " is the key for me . keep the faith .karl Alfred grambo

309. Bruno Strunz (2018-08-06) #

     Derek:
     
     Thank you so much for sharing this article. Love the new book's title, by the way -- I found this really useful when I read it in "Anything You Want".
     
     While I was reading the article, a couple of things came to mind. First, in the book "Presence" (Amy Cuddy), she talks about baseball players having their bat score behind them before going in. And, specially in the beginning of the season, when their stats are usually low, this can dramatically affect their performance. But if you take a closer look at the crowd, half of them are not even paying attention. In a situation when you would assume that you'd have the spotlight, people are not paying that much attention as you would imagine. It seems to me that there's a great connection with what you were talking about on your article.
     
     And the importance (or not) of confidence. Wouldn't it be a twist on how you look at confidence rather than discarding it altogether? It seems to me that you're stating that confidence should come from self-knowledge, from knowing, for example, that you are helping, rather than thinking about how people evaluate/regard your help. Makes sense? I wouldn't discard confidence right away, as long as it doesn't come with a fixed mindset, stubbornness and arrogance. Also reminded me of the Level 5 Leadership that Jim Collins mentions in his book "Good to Great": "Level 5 Leaders display a powerful mixture of personal humility and indomitable will. They're incredibly ambitious, but their ambition is first and foremost for the cause, for the organization and its purpose, not themselves."
     
     I loved the "Learning without doing is wasted". I always challenge my clients to the "Monday Mantra" (by Bruno Strunz...): "This is all great and all, but what are you going to do on Monday, when routine (and life, for that matter) comes barking at your door?" Specially in this corporate training environment that I live in, I think that people have little to none accountability with the "call to action" of the training itself. Which results in good food in the trash, or, in the company's case, almost literally incinerating money.
     
     I'm anxiously waiting for the next one!
     
     Best,
     
     Bruno

310. Trey McGriff (2018-08-06) #

     Thanks so much for sharing Derek! I am excited for your new book to come out soon and I really enjoyed reading this!
     Trey :)

311. Jen (2018-08-06) #

     I like the wisdom here coming from your personal experience over many years and it seems to be similar to themes of other things I'm reading/hearing lately.
     
     How to be a Person in the World contains a section on Identity and Becoming an Artist which addresses knowing who you are and what you are meant to do.
     
     It seems like many talented people have to go through the phases of blind certainty and then despair and paralysis before arriving at healthy, realistic place of creating.

312. Christina Lee (2018-08-06) #

     Creating work that inspires you without the concern of others is constant growth.
     Aligning your inspired work with others interest is opportunity.
     Being able to apply what you’ve learned to the right area of your life supports confidence.

313. Alex (2018-08-06) #

     Derek, we are all our own worse critics in life. Reading what you have
     written is an eye opener, why? Well for one since I know you it has never
     occurred to me you have been a self serving person let alone as you write
     dumb. (I know more of figurative speech than truth).
     A person can step out of their comfort zone to learn about other opportunities or whatever drives other people’s success, or perhaps the perception of what the public may want or what you think they might want. The bottom line is you are always contributing and sometimes without even realizing it. Prime example would be CD Baby, look how it has evolved because you shared your knowledge with fellow musicians etc. At the time you say your glad your old confidence is gone, no! It has just redirected itself in your new awareness of perhaps how programed people of this world are. Your current contribution in this world will never be another contest nor was it the first time around. Life is a series of learning experiences and it is up to us as individuals in how we proceed, stuck or not! There is always a way to learn and apply such to share or as many say, “pay it forward” I know the feeling of being stuck all too well. It sucks!!! Yet we must never give up no matter what, or we die. Your choice is unique because not only do you share your journey, you are inspiring countless others. So please by all means keep doing what Derek sees fit to do, I know I am grateful we met as all of your followers are sure to be. Keep it going Derek Sivers...

314. Jaso'n (2018-08-06) #

     How does work set you free? How do those obstacles wake you up to what's happening right now? Volumes have been written and even more are on the way, so thanks for simplifying! I find this Isak Dinesen quote relevant and useful: "Work every day without hope or despair."

315. Thierry Meier (2018-08-06) #

     Thanks for this piece. It is something I have to keep on telling myself, too.
     
     Alain de Botton's book "Status Anxiety" (http://alaindebotton.com/status/) has immediately come to mind, especially reading those two sentences:
     
     "So I’m glad my old confidence is gone, because it thought I was right, and maybe even great. But I quit that contest."
     
     "I’d start to make things, but then see how stupid they revealed me to be, so I’d stop. I lost all confidence. I spent a few years completely stuck.".
     
     The book has helped me a lot (and I have to keep re-reading parts of it to keep things fresh and not fall prey to the anxiety again) overcoming parts of the contest and simply focusing on things I enjoy and making my little contribution to the world. I also thought of this post by DHH: https://signalvnoise.com/posts/1437-put-a-dent-in-the-universe -- I am sure you know this one already but I thought some of the other readers might not :)
     
     Aiming high and "shooting for the stars", as general advice tells you to do, has been stifling to me personally. Instead, I tell myself nowadadays: aim low, reach those goals, then aim again -- it creates a sense of progress and momentum. I see the same in friends of mine who think they have to put a major mark on the world instead of simply focusing on a dent. It makes them feel frustrated, unworthy and anxious -- just like it made me and still sometimes does.

316. Peggy (2018-08-06) #

     Derek,
     
     These are wonderful words--so liberating. I grew up trained to do everything with excellence. Of course it's a worthy thing to aim for work well done, but if you are a sensitive person, as most creatives are, that can internally morph far beyond a good thing into something paralyzing. The save is to think of the people that your creations can help, no matter if your creations are masterpieces or not. We have all had our lives enriched by even just one line or idea from a book or article or blog post or song. The entire piece was not necessarily a masterpiece, but that line or idea was incredibly valuable and a joy. It's the same for what we ourselves create. Our creations are a form of love, so if we focus on loving others through our words as best we can at any given moment, we are free.

317. Rejyna (2018-08-06) #

     Hate to shred the epiphanies, but you were right all along, from the very beginning.
     
     The growth now is you've realized that 'right' is subjective and fluid and yours to claim at each step.
     
     What you may have mixed up is thinking exclusively, as in superior accuracy.
     
     The right you think you thought you were was potentially accurate, certainly not wrong, but also not not right.
     
     Perspective and presumption are what changes in us - not our rightness.
     
     I've never witnessed your accuracy as anything else but correctness, in the 15 or so years I've followed your beacon. Shine forward please.

318. Scott Wild (2018-08-06) #

     Looking good so far.
     I find myself wanting a little more information in the contribution department. Real life examples or a more in depth explanation. That's about it.
     Cheers!

319. Bogdan (2018-08-06) #

     It's nice to see that someone whose way of thinking I admire is also having these thoughts and doubts. It gives me hope. I can relate to all 3 points, but the last one is something that seems the hardest to get through my thick skull. I'm often paralysed by thinking the quality of my work isn't good enough to see the light of day. And this just feeds my procrastination habits (like the one you mentioned at point 1).
     I've tried writing a list of 30 such things I've learned through my life, some of which are similar to the ideas you mentioned here. I think you might enjoy reading them. It's a short post. You can find it here: https://optimizemy.life/wednesday-wisdom/30-lessons/
     Again, thanks for sharing these thoughts. Looking forward to some more previews of your new book.

320. Chris Pinto (2018-08-06) #

     Your "little" contribution gave indie artists and companies a whole new avenue which major labels had been not interested in exploring for years! Derek.. this gets the HELL YEAAAAHHHH! On this one! Very useful! You put the world on bro!

321. Peter (2018-08-06) #

     Hi Derek,
     
     It is always great to get your emails. Great email as always. Being humble seems
     to come to mind, my goals is always to be the most underestimated in the room,
     that gives me the potential to learn the most. I am thinking of opening a bank account in Singapore, for its many advantages. Can you recommend some financial institutions there? I would really like to understand why you live there, as I understand its a very expensive place to live. Have you found a Spanish translator for your book? I am bilingual but my wife is great at the proper grammar. We are here to help if you need anything or questions in that arena.
     
     Thanks,
     
     Peter
     
     Mobile 786-251-7588

322. Annie (2018-08-06) #

     Thanks for this post Derek! I've been in the same rut you described this year. Launched my own biz, it didn't go the way I planned, so I've been recruiting, and it's been mentally exhausting to tell myself I still have much to offer. You're totally right. I need to remind myself that this is not about me. I think depression, anxiety and much of our suffering comes from focusing too much on the "self". Tony Robbins has a great quote about that which I can't recite exactly. I really wish everyone (who's seemingly successful) shares their struggles the way you do. It's just too easy to compare our behind the scenes with everyone's highlight reel in this age we live in. Again, thanks for this wonderful post and your authenticity!

323. Monique Hurteau (2018-08-06) #

     As a writer, stand up comedian and visual artist this absolutely resonates.
     
     I'm always in this state of flux of learning, thinking I've achieved something (momentarily basking in that) to have it revealed to me (every time) the utter vastness of how little I know. It's sometimes exciting and can be deflating. Deflating because I feel foolish at the idea I felt pretty darned good about my "achievement" there for a minute.
     
     I think it's ok to feel accomplished but mostly if I keep using it as a propellant forward. Keep studying, keep learning, keep applying, keep reiterating, keep being curious and sharing with others as I go.
     
     Thanks again for sharing.

324. Steve (2018-08-06) #

     Stuck is a hard place to be, but such an easy place to stay for far too long. At some point every person has to face the demon of their own importance/worth, or lack of on a greater scale, and decide to either keep going anyway or throw in the towel for good.
     
     Sometimes it's not even important what the final outcome is, as long as there is one...in other words, sometimes we just need to do whatever it is we feel we are supposed to be doing & keep moving to the next thing. As a wise person once said to me: This thing doesn't have to be perfect, it only has to propel us to the next...

325. Anthony Wright (2018-08-06) #

     Hello. Interesting post as always, and so many great comments. Learning, though, changes you and affects what happens to you. Some people would say that it alters your vibration. You are never quite the same person if you are progressing, and the chances are that if you are not progressing you're eventually doing the other thing; regressing.
     
     You don't have to apply everything you learn as a mission. You yourself are the resulting sum total.
     
     You probably can't help being the developing character, and if we asked you to stop you wouldn't be able to, honestly, would you? (Nobody is going to ask you to stop. You are helpful, and thought-provoking too).
     
     Don't worry about confidence either. All you have to do to beat the lack of it is concentrate whole-heartedly on what you are doing. Then you become the art you're making in the moment and there's no-one there to be afraid.
     
     Great post - looking forward to the book.

326. Chris Spiegl (2018-08-06) #

     I get stuck on this so incredibly much. Learning something. Trying to get better. To finally be "good enough". To do something. To present. But what happens?
     
     I end up feeling not good enough. Because by learning more, I also learned more about the people in the field, and how much there is to learn. So then I feel stupid again - even though I already came a long way.
     
     I'm trying to get over it. Produce either way. Just contribute with what I have right here and now.
     
     It's a journey.

327. Ben (2018-08-06) #

     Love this!
     
     In particular the point about people not judging your work because they're just looking for things to improve their own life. For any creator I think this is sound advice!
     
     Well said Derek.

328. Doug Toft (2018-08-06) #

     Wonderful article, as usual.
     
     For your book — in which links to your other articles will not work in the same as online — add a sentence or two to each link that summarizes the key point of the linked article.

329. Gary Davidson (2018-08-06) #

     You are definitely on to something here. The older I get the more I discover the less I know. Very Humbling. Falling Upward by Richard Rohr is a good reference for this discovery. Thanks, Derek.

330. Craig (2018-08-06) #

     Great read, I feel that thes first two bullet points are why students get stuck after graduating college. Heck, that’s why I got stuck.

331. Jody Whitesides (2018-08-06) #

     Doing without learning is wasted as well.
     
     Let the work of anything speak for itself.

332. Dallas (2018-08-06) #

     I love this.
     
     the only part that doesn't resonate for me is when you say, "Learning without doing is wasted."
     
     i think there are many reasons to learn. and that they don't all have to point to an action being taken. i'm reminded of the Emerson quote: "I cannot remember the books I've read any more than the meals I have eaten; even so, they have made me."
     
     i appreciate who you are, what you've learned, and what you do - thank you for sharing it with us.

333. Earl Carter (2018-08-06) #

     This is absolutely amazing! I've reached a similar place in my little world. Thank you so much for sharing this.
     
     Much love and respect!
     
     Earl

334. kristina (2018-08-06) #

     "Once you're an expert it's very difficult to look at problems with the eyes of a novice"--Francesca Gino, in an interview with Shankar Vedantam on a "Hidden Brain" Podcast, titled "You: 2.0 Rebel With A Cause.
     
     I found it to be good food for thought and I think it fits in with what you're getting at here with the confidence thing. They discuss cardiologists too experienced in procedures to accept evidence that what they are doing is harmful instead of helpful. They just don't accept it. I think it's a good goal to keep a student's perspective, staying open to learning new and better ways or just different ways that may work in a pinch. They cover that too, in their discussion of Captain Sully, the pilot famous for his heroic plane landing in the Hudson Bay. Mostly, I think you'll enjoy the turn in the conversation that takes place at minute 19, where they discuss an experiment, where they had guitarists play songs and then replay them with their non dominate hand, making them feel like beginners again. This allowed them to relive what it was like to be a novice and this helped them to better advise students.
     
     I like your idea of contributing! Is it possible that you feel able to contribute due to confidence you have gained through experiences and so maybe well placed confidence is really the trick, rather than less confidence? Just a question for yourself. I'm confident that you are on to something and I hope my comment is contribution to that. All the best!

335. Nicky Shane (2018-08-06) #

     Hey Derek, One of the best calapfones (I just made it up) about these feedback emails is it distracts me from my upside-down life (?) looking for work, the summer heat, my band, scripts, me, me, me, LA, am I ever going to get back to stand-up, is that producer still using my music? My agent, where in the hell is he...
     Oh, I would change "...got successful" to became successful... / I circumvent your thoughts and concerns about life, quality output and the fear of loosing your creative edge. Maybe you were once lucky but you were in the right place at the right moment. Will you be there again is the answer to many questions. "The Road" is your creative groove turning and twisting, reaching backwards and forwards but always seeking the verisimilitude of the pavement. It's your nature to keep reaching for a grounding. You're a creative traveler seeking questions... with diverse answers. When you do something that has not been done before? You make the rules so sometimes you trip over them. So what, Ha... People keep telling me my art will become famous after I die. How peaceful is that thought? At that point does it matter? Ha!

336. Kit Collins (2018-08-06) #

     I've been struggling with a seemingly similar feeling of stuck-ness lately: I'm hyperaware of the shortcomings of my ideas, the ways in which they're not universal, not for everybody, only helpful or fun in constrained circumstances. It does make it hard to start things! I thank you for this helpful reminder. A thing doesn't have to be useful or resonant for every single person in order to be useful or resonant enough to be worth doing.

337. Matt (2018-08-06) #

     This reminds me of the process Patrick O'Shaughnessy (of the Invest Like the Best podcast) talks about. His process is learn, build, share, repeat.

338. Greg (2018-08-06) #

     Never ask your Mom for feedback as she's likely to tell you everything you do is the best in the world! As such, careful asking your fans as we love your work and it may be hard to give construction feedback.
     That said, I love the concise message but I take issue with "learning without doing is wasted". I would agree it's less valuable, but not wasted. Learning yields value in incremental intelligence, further creativity, and opening new perspectives. These things may not happen immediately, but over time they evolve as you become more through your learning. So often learning is a predecessor to thoughts that lead to action. There's so many other things we could do with our time that I consider a true waste, but I wouldn't lump learning in that category.
     Looking forward to the book!

339. Chris (2018-08-06) #

     Hi, Derek.
     
     I'm happy that you were so confident.
     
     Your confidence, ostensibly, gave you the energy and risk appetite to achieve your goals. I perceive personal confidence as the assurance that with one's capabilities, one can close the distance between the present state and some more ideal future reality. With this working definition, over-confidence is to misjudge one's capabilities. That said, even if you were overconfident, you were within stretching distance to what you wanted to achieve.
     
     For the record, I think you were great then and are now. Thanks for everything you do.
     
     Cheers,
     Chris

340. Steve Denyes (2018-08-06) #

     I love your work and your writing. Your contribution has improved my life in many ways. All that said, I think this piece isn't as laser-focused as most of your writing. I've read it several times, followed all the links and I understand the point you are making but I can't help but feel it could be tightened up. As a reader it felt like a wild swerving ride with big concepts pulling me in several directions. I don't have specific suggestions other than perhaps this piece could be two or three different pieces with your usual laser-focus instead of one. I only offer this up in the spirit of making it the best it can be.

341. Alyssa McDonald (2018-08-06) #

     Talk about recreating yourself! I get it! I have just experienced what you have conveyed in the paragraph above! It's been 4 years and finally, I am at the point where I am focusing on "legacy".
     
     I am going to go create some more legacy now, lest I lose more time, waiting for what I thought I already had:)
     
     Love your articles!
     
     Alyssa

342. Cory Huff (2018-08-06) #

     The beginner's attitude is so very important. You have to be willing to look foolish in order to learn quickly. This is how I took up acting, how I learned Mandarin, and how I learned about marketing.
     
     I love taking on projects where I'm a neophyte. My next one is self-publishing my first novel.

343. Larry Larson (2018-08-06) #

     amen brother !! the journey and awareness is similar. i tell people these days, i can't really tell you anything about success. it is an aberration of dumb-luck and sheer stupidity in confidence. But i can share with the listener 1,000's of things i did that didn't work, and somehow i am lucky(?) to still stand. The final piece "quit that contest". Nice. Thank you !

344. Drew Rieder (2018-08-06) #

     Thanks Derek. It's good to hear from you. And this was useful to me. Blessings.

345. Karen lorena parker (2018-08-07) #

     I tell students about gathering and presenting. Similar to your learning and doing. That we require that full cycle to learn and understand because when we present To the world it is that dialogue that clarifies our knowledge. Or shows us whatever need to gather next. Nice post— you cover a lot!

346. Chockkalingam Karuppaiah (2018-08-07) #

     "Learning without doing is wasted" so true! Our learning combined with our past, presents a unique opportunity to create something unique, that will feed and be the seed to future creations. Key is to act!

347. Amy Wang (2018-08-07) #

     I have heard about one saying, which says growing up is nothing but a process that makes you realize you are just an ordinary people in this world. From my perspective, to some extent, it is corresponding to your ideas. When we get older, we gradually find how little knowledge we know and how much things we don’t know about. Then, learning turns to be the best thing we could do at that time.

348. Joy (2018-08-07) #

     Love this. Real and different. I am paying attention!

349. Andras Molnar (2018-08-07) #

     This is really great! Keep writing because I think this will have a great impact on people’s way of thinking and their lives.
     For this chapter “you don’t need confidence...” have you considered including a story from your past to illustrate the point t more clearly? I love the bullet points, but lead up seems a bit vague.
     Keep up the inspiring work!

350. Maria (2018-08-07) #

     Great insight. A selfless way to keep learning and improving as a person, while doing and bringing value into other people's lifes. Thanks for sharing!

351. Dan McCann (2018-08-07) #

     I like what you are saying here Derek. I feel this applies to my life as well. Reading this makes me feel less alone. Thank you.

352. Martin Lund (2018-08-07) #

     That”dumb lucky” that you experienced starting your successful company wasn’t all that. From what you have said in the past it was simply a situation where “I was helping my friends achieve their goals.”You were contributing what you knew and they didn’t. Talk about consistency, way to go, Mister!

353. Natalie Martin (2018-08-07) #

     Well that was useful Derek!
     Thank you. Quit the contest and contribute....... fine words. Thank you for sharing. You have just helped me make a big decision.... a useful one!

354. William Ortiz Alvarado (2018-08-07) #

     Very nicely put. Mature and insightful, even inspiring. Bravo!

355. Stephen Pettie (2018-08-07) #

     I totally agree with and identify with these life lessons. I am still rapping and making beats at the age of 45. I ask myself often what people will think of me but I quickly shake it off because i love doing it. Also, people (not a lot) enjoy my product. So with that, i say there is only one rule: THERE ARE NO RULES. Keep pushing, you not living, if your not learning. I have a soon to be released project on CD Baby called Air Maxx Radio (Freeze). Check it out and let me know if I’m wasting my time.

356. Alec Wills (2018-08-07) #

     I like most of what you're saying but I'm not sure I fully agree. I think you need confidence but definitely not just confidence. If you learn something, e.g. read a book then you gain competence (how to do something), but have no experience so lack confidence. If you just do something then you get confidence but if you don't know if it was good/bad/useful then you get little competence. However, if you learn something and add a tiny bit of confidence to then do something and you learn something new/extra from doing, then your competence and confidence slowly grow in equal measure until you eventually become congruent or professional. Being confident without competence is just blind confidence where you rely on luck, but similarly knowing how to do something is just a waste if you have no confidence to actually do it. So I would argue you do need confidence in order to contribute and vice versa. Let each build from the other and be as useful as you can be, otherwise you're still being wasteful!
     
     But fundamentally I get your point, the secret to life is actualisation.

357. Ben Grew (2018-08-07) #

     Wise words to me Derek! Looking forward to the book

358. Raul Guara (2018-08-07) #

     At this moment, I am almost against the world, because my way of thinking is similar to yours
     if one does not perform in what he learns
     has miserably wasted time

359. Paul S (2018-08-07) #

     Awesome Derek! I really resonate with this and find it encouraging for my own personal efforts, where sometimes I also don't have the confidence - funny how we are sometimes not only not-confident, but embarrassed by our not-confidence (unconfident in our unconfidence).
     
     I like what you are saying here about focusing on our unique contribution. Thanks for sharing and being yourself!
     
     Funny how the more honest and open we are and the more we are naturally just ourselves the more people resonate.

360. Yumi (2018-08-07) #

     This article is so relevant to me at the moment. Thanks for sharing!
     
     It’s surprisingly honest, thorough, and deeply inspiring for anyone struggling with “analysis paralysis”.

361. John Mosser (2018-08-07) #

     I am not a very good singer (low confidence), but since I'm doing my own indie thing, all that matters is that I'm expressing myself through the wonderful communication medium known as music. The more ways we can all postively EXPRESS OURSELVES, the better the world will be.
     
     I think I remember you have a kid too. So at 58, with 3 kids, everything I strive to do, whether I succeed or not, can help me understand what THEY are going through at 16, 20, and 22 years old. Even if you don't have kids, the more you strive to express yourself in as many ways as you like, the more you can be empathetic and contribute to others' experiences and growth.
     
     Thanks for sharing your new writings - I like what you wrote.
     John

362. chaliflani (2018-08-07) #

     You have given a definition to some of my current experiences, It's always a pleasure reading your words Mr. Sivers.

363. Adriana (2018-08-07) #

     “The public me is not the real me anyway.” Such a succinct way to dispel the unease I’ve been feeling lately as I endeavor to share more of myself and my gifts with the world.

364. Leandro Nascimento Camargo (2018-08-07) #

     Isn't the notion of "making your work unique" prone to comparison (in order to see and feel it as unique)? Or yet, ins't that requirement something that seems to come from the ego?
     
     I'm just not sure if that's good or healthy for your inner self. It nurtures an inner self-critique that might grow big and hurt yourself, hence block yourself from simply just doing your work, without further self-judgements. Lets take art as example. Art doesn't need to be useful or unique, as long as you feel good about it. It's about expressing yourself somehow. It doesn't need to be or mean anything to the world, does it? It could only be a form of self-healing or a way to expand your self-awareness and self-knowledge. And if that, when publicly exposed, turns out to be useful somehow, that's bonus!

365. Jim (2018-08-07) #

     There might be an element of hubris with confidence but contribution always requires audience participation. Thanks and best wishes on your direction.

366. Sue May (2018-08-07) #

     I think you need both confidence and contribution. I understand that you need to do what is right for you and that should lead to success, but people buy confidence. And you do need to produce something that people want, otherwise you can't move forward. I am very much coming at this from the angle of a start-up business, not learning a new skill, and so you need to be successful in order to make a living, and that requires confidence in yourself as well as your products. The contribution comes from having products that people desire in the first place. I agree that the work is the point and that you have to enjoy the work, but I don't have the funds, or the time, to be stuck for a few years - it's got to be pretty much right now!

367. Al Blatter (2018-08-07) #

     Hey Eric,
     
     This article typifies the old saying: "Too bad youth is wasted on the young"! When we're young--especially when we've had some success--we have a tendency to believe that we're the "chosen" one(s)! NOT SO! And the wisdom of age teaches us that; often the "Hard Way". But all any of us can do is make our immediate, respective Worlds the best that we can. That in itself is rather difficult! Still, we gotta try. Hopefully, the "Wisdom gods" will help us along?

368. Fabio (2018-08-07) #

     "(...) and in his passionate desire to excel, he was often led to the brink of some rash step; and yet, having resolved upon such a step, when the moment arrived, he invariably proved too sensible to take it." Dostoevsky, The Idiot, Ch. 39
     
     How generous of you to share this valuable insight. I loved it and it really got something moving...
     
     Cheers!

369. Ashley Yuan (2018-08-07) #

     I couldn't have read this article at a better time. Thanks for sharing Derek.
     
     I love learning, and I'm forever curious, which leads to more interest in learning different things. I used to be proud that I'm an enthusiastic student of life until I realized - like how you did - learning without doing equals zero impact, which means zero contribution to the world.
     
     I even found the stages I went through similar as yours - first, there was a burst of the excitement of learning new stuff, then comes to the point where the more I learned, the more I realized how little I knew compared to the knowledge I need to have if I want to create something great. There is this little voice saying "if it's not great, there is no point to create it." So I started, stopped, started, stopped, feeling completely stuck, confused and paralysed.
     
     It's only until very recently this year that finally I started getting it - it doesn't matter if what I create is great, nothing revolutionary is required, most importantly it needs to be useful for people. Although there might be no more "original ideas" left in the world to be said, with my personality (which is unique by default), stories, and way of communication, maybe it'll help someone who didn't get the message previously get it this time through me.
     
     "So I’m glad my old confidence is gone, because it thought I was right, and maybe even great. But I quit that contest.
     
     Now I aim to make my work — my little contribution to the world — just unique and useful."
     
     Cheers to quitting the contest of being great and right, and starting the journey of consistent action and small contribution.

370. Laks (2018-08-07) #

     Sivers -
     
     >Now I aim to make my work — my little contribution to the world — just unique and useful.
     
     Thats spot on, completely agree. Whenever I used to work on FOSS project, I'll be thinking 'Even if this helps a single person and rejected by rest of the world, its worth my time and effort'. :) [ http://qr.ae/TUIDjK ]

371. Yael (2018-08-07) #

     Hello! Thank you for sharing and inviting comments.
     
     I find the thoughts in this chapter interesting but I don't find that the idea that learning without doing leads to loss of confidence is convincing.
     
     Maybe you lost confidence because you had such a great success early in life and missed the chance to learn early about the fallibility of humains and how to accept mistakes and failures without loosing self-esteem?
     
     I agree that the more you know, the more you are aware of how little you know but in my experience, it has not made me loose confidence, it has just been thrilling and motivating and inducing of awe whether it translates to doing or just enriches my mind!!! Attaching my self-worth to anything external and then failing at it has, however!
     
     Thanks for hearing me out! Let me know if you would like anything clarified. Best wishes with the rest of your writing!
     
     Yael

372. Koyi (2018-08-07) #

     Derek trust me I believe you can only contribute objectively if you have the confidence!
     
     My thoughts

373. Lily Liang (2018-08-07) #

     Learning without doing is wasted: I like the idea a lot. I learned a lot from TED about discipline, work effectively etc. Now I need to put it into pratice.

374. Cso Horvath (2018-08-07) #

     Yess, couldn't agree more, I've been trying to apply this too for a while but it's a lot harder than it sounds.
     
     It reminds me of a quote I heard on a podcast - "it doesn't have to be good, it just has to exist", I put this on a reminder so I see it every day at 12 pm. It's sort of like create first, or "ship", and edit/overanalyse later. Or maybe don't overthink at all? Also, for me at least, this blockage in the creation process seems to be tied to the ignorance you mention. The "everyone is wrong, I am right attitude", the criticism and dismissal towards the outside I think blocks me on the inside, so cultivating being more understanding and accepting of the works that are out there might be very helpful.
     
     And re creating new things, I also came to the conclusion that it doesn't have to be new ideas, there's so much knowledge out there already but there's only a few people who integrate these really well. I love your quote "If [more] information was the answer, then we'd all be billionaires with perfect abs", so a lot of times spreading already the good information that's out there can be a huge contribution, repackaging it so more people understand it, or just helping people apply what they already sort of know would be really important.

375. Aly (2018-08-07) #

     Even if one's work isn't unique, it's still important.

376. Princess Diane von B (2018-08-07) #

     Hi Derek,
     Always ups the learning curve to read your posts. This personal growth trajectory is an important one. I think you have always known what you are doing, you just had to get out of your own way! ;) This post will help a lot of people-we need to use our gifts because they make the world a better place, and that focus is like jet fuel. There is a wonderful saying that is something like "it would be a quiet place indeed if only the birds who sang best, were the ones that sang." Merci milles fois. Your fan, Princess Diane Von Brainisfried aka Diane Uniman

377. Paul (2018-08-07) #

     That is some good shit. Wish I'd heard/read it years ago. Thank you!

378. Jaysen Sutton (2018-08-07) #

     As someone trying to start up his own company, I really resonated with this. It's far harder than I imagined, mostly because my ego often gets in the way of my decisions. I'll try to remember these lessons - that what matters is I'm doing something useful, contributing to the world, even if I'm constantly thinking, and doubting, my actions.
     
     Thank you for this. You have a knack for communicating these important lessons in such a digestible way.

379. Mary (2018-08-07) #

     Powerful

380. Shaun Goodsell (2018-08-07) #

     Derek, my comments are related to the relateability of what you wrote. I especially liked the learning without doing concept. Not only do I think that it is a waste but I find learning to not be complete until the learning has been tested with action. Confidence, can also only be finalized in the moments of action. No matter what might be popular confidence is not a positive thought attempting to persuade us to believe in ourselves. Confidence is strengthened and fortified through the rigors of daily action.
     
     Thank you for your preview!!!
     
     Best to you Derek

381. Cee Josephs (2018-08-07) #

     Yes, I agree with you on contributing. However one must have the confidence to do. Thanks for your blogs throughout the years.

382. Jean Claude Jones (2018-08-07) #

     Thanks Derek, i guess it is what it is of growing up and knowing more of what we are and do on this planet.
     Personally i do feel i am making a contribution to the free improvised music scene worldwide, the little feedback i am getting helps me tremendously to keep keeping on my own path, and i am becoming as time passes by more honored, moved, grateful to my immediate surroundings, family friends relationships colleagues for their love and attention.
     Now Derek it seems you are on a transformation process that will be so good for you i trust.
     Be well man, take good care of yourself and loved ones.
     
     Love is Love is Love is Love is Love

383. Mike (2018-08-07) #

     Not fond of the term Dumbo lucky I understand what you're trying to say but might want to reword it not to be so demeaning
     Same with the term absolute idiot those of us that are your followers know you don't have the success you do because you're an absolute Idoit so it's very contradictory in my mind to try to reconcile the two.
     I e realize how much I had to learn, realize how how inexperienced I was
     You get to train of thought hope this helps

384. Luis (2018-08-07) #

     Succinct and poignant. Specially that bit on “learning without doing being pointless”, it landed too close to home. Thank you!

385. Greg (2018-08-07) #

     Regarding the success; Very humble self assessment Derek. If we don’t account for the alignment necessary for such successes I think we are far too ignorant of the forces in life unseen which help us arrive at a given place. Was your destiny to have that success though as it gave you this platform ultimately which many are grateful for and allows you to do the work for the sake of the work. . Confidence without humility is on the wrong side of the ego. As we age we become wiser to our flow and place in life and as strange as it is , all of us here fumbling around doing and racing and working and striving in this tiny blue orb spinning in space , what does it all untlimately mean? Our purpose here is indelibly tied to contribution because that’s what will carry our essence long after we are gone but only within this little as Carl Sagan put it ; pale blue dot.

386. Cee Josephs (2018-08-07) #

     Again: Derek, your younger self was your younger self, period. And that younger self gave our younger selves a great start!(as you know, I'm one of the 'starters' on CDbaby).

387. JILL WOODWORTH (2018-08-07) #

     I get this. Though a bit convoluted... So many years not knowing that I was knowing and doing but then to become aware that while I was not knowing and doing I was creating a whirlwind the likes of now knowing has almost been my undoing. So now I know nothing of meaning as far as lucrative value and I must start over. But I can't start over as to start over is to lose the deeper meaning of the doing I did while not knowing. Especially if it can be of use. If what not knowing and doing, and now knowing can be of use to any on this wild tangent then I have to just have faith that what needs to be known will be known whether my knowledge, now known is needed. That's needy.

388. Zack Bassage (2018-08-07) #

     Reminds me of Woody Allen's philosophy.
     
     What side are you on for the output debate, Derek? Do you believe that its better to focus on making as much work as possible, knowing that some work will end up being great? Or do you stray on the side of making perfection, honing one work forever until it meets the level you see in your head?

389. Greg Berard (2018-08-07) #

     I really enjoy the line of thinking. Being successful in one thing doesn't mean you're going to be successful in something new. Learning and growing are ever important, but doing something with your knowledge is, as you said, the point of learning at all.

390. Paul (2018-08-07) #

     Thoughtful, as always. Thanks!

391. Gary (2018-08-07) #

     Great point. Cogent as always.
     I think of you when I write a three-page e-mail that could be distilled to one paragraph. Talk about counter-melody!...all Ph.D dissertations should now be ten pages or less.
     And all essays related to our current president should prob be three words or less: I'll go with 'problematic weaponized human' (although that is difficult to chant :)

392. Wes (2018-08-07) #

     Awesome morsel! Excited for the rest of it.
     
     I think the middle bullet is the most unique and poignant - it resonated with me the most as I have similar thinking (which is probably why I focused on it...). It would be interesting to tease out how you apply that concept (and the other bullets too).
     
     For example, on memos, presentations or emails where I feel most nervous or self conscious drafting, where I feel that I am putting myself out in a way that will expose exactly how 'dumb-lucky' I am, I usually write at the top "this isn't about me, it's about XXX," where XXX is my purpose for doing the thing. It keeps me from pulling the ripcord out of ego or some other excuse.
     
     Just a personal exercise, but more importantly I think readers might enjoy understanding your processing of implementing these thoughts into action if you have examples to share.
     
     Thanks much for sharing!

393. JD (2018-08-07) #

     Hey Derek,
     
     If you aim to create unique and useful things, you're falling short. By all means, please aim to create beautiful, unique and useful instead.

394. Les Pardoe (2018-08-07) #

     Do not be to tough on yourself you have done big things.Progress is like riding a bike "keep moving forward in order to arrive " Thanks for sending, always pleased to hear from you. Les Pardoe

395. david mulkey (2018-08-07) #

     Your thoughts are always provocative and inspiring. Good luck, and keep writing, and doing.

396. malcolm toriumi (2018-08-07) #

     My response to your article. HELL YEAH! So very honest and True.

397. Thomas Ziegler (2018-08-07) #

     Thanks for sharing. I get the point you are making, but I also believe you would not have arrived where you are today without having confidence. And I believe you acknowledge that by saying that you're glad your old confidence is gone. Maybe the wisdom to take away from this is that confidence (together with commitment and being driven) is necessary to get a start. But there might come a time to lose that confidence, get stuck and reboot.
     
     Contribution and confidence can work well together when the confidence is not blindsiding the goal. I am wondering why you didn't turn the outcome of your learning into action ? I am sure you did to some degree.
     
     And I am looking forward to more of your contributions.
     
     Thomas

398. George (2018-08-07) #

     I've never cared too much about making money. I've always always landed on my feet and made good recordings, getting the most from the least... Is it luck or karma or something else?

399. Bill Bodell (2018-08-07) #

     Excellent Derek. Much food for thought.

400. Doris (2018-08-07) #

     Thanks Derek for you candidness. I want to share some of own thoughts.
     
     This article makes me think of many other things that I've read---hyper-realism mentioned by Ray Dalio in 'Principles', 'A beginner's mind' or 'Shoshin' in Zen, The importance of skepticism in maintaining an open society stressed by Karl Popper, and how recognizing our ignorance gave humans the power to explore, correct, and innovate from 'Sapiens: A Brief History of Humankind'. I feel that somehow they are all connected.
     
     Most people worry too much about themselves, their successes and failures, and what others may think of them. But they spend so little time studying the things themselves.
     
     I totally relate to the post, sometimes confidence could be an obstacle in getting things done. In my experience of learning and creating, I figured that it's really important to let go of the self and its associated worries and expectations, so we can view things and ourselves more objectively, thus we know where our boundaries are and therefore we can figure out how to expand them.
     
     Also viewing things in a physical perspective definitely helps, since everything is governed by physical laws. I now hardly get impatient while learning because I know that neutrons need time to grow and form new connections. And I stopped worrying about making mistakes since I know that I can always improve and people will only remember me by my best works(Even Da Vinci made many anatomical mistakes in his early drawings).
     
     Anyway, we all want to create, but realizing the repeating, zigzagged, sometimes tortuous and excruciating nature of the process helps to keep us going.

401. Guen (2018-08-08) #

     It takes a lot of self awareness and courage to be so brutal and honest with oneself. Thank you for sharing. I’m moved to do the same for myself.

402. Bryan (2018-08-08) #

     Terrific article that will make a great chapter.
     
     I'm excited a new Derek Sivers book is on the way!

403. Skinny (2018-08-08) #

     Boy does this hit home. I too was super confident and had a way to big ego as a successful solo entertainer. Ya it was a lot of work, but it was FUN work!
     
     I got to a point where it just wasn't fun anymore and lost my passion for performing live music. And I too was just damn lucky really the way my career took off, but now I'm stuck in a rut with no clue how to get my Mojo back. I havn't done a solo gig in months.
     So.. I just contribute to projects i feel good about and hope it all pans out.
     
     I guess we shall see.
     
     I always enjoy reading your stuff. Useful indeed. Thanks.

404. Lori Davis-Sandoval (2018-08-08) #

     Hey Derek,
     Yep, were all just here playing with contrast. Im loving life with all the stickiness, BS, and great fun and discovery. I like the way you laid this all out. I was just listening to a podcast with Chase and the guy who founded Ruby on Rails-SP
     I like what you said about confidence/contribution- Yes, we just go on and get with it.
     Once when I was stuck you told me the story of the Donkey stuck in a hole. It had hay on one side and water on the other, it couldn't decide so it starved...Hahahha. i always think of that when i can't move forward, and it always makes me laugh...
     Thanks for being here,
     Lori

405. Francisco (2018-08-08) #

     That "old Confidence" lives inside us all, and leaves all of us at some point in our lifes(I guess).
     And that moment is when we´re really ready to take on a more humbling life, in which our experience appears to be just another demonstration of how trully relative everything is in Life. Thus paving the way for a more grounding existence, one that allows us to only be gratefull if we can help others, and getting a simple but absolute gratification from doing so.
     And that´s pretty much what your´re doing now, so I guess we should thank you on behalf of all of us who aprecciate it, and also on behalf of those who don´t yet know about it, but for whom you´re also putting all these bits of knowledge and advice together too.
     So it´s good that that "old confidence" is gone now: the longer one spends too sure of one self, the harder it is when life gets us back down on our knees.
     The greater confidence one have is to know that how very little one knows, and how very little onw must excepect or be certain of.
     The only rule to abide in life is goodness.
     
     It fills other with joy and gets joy back at you
     
     Just to let you know, your notes help a lot of people i´m sure (me included) so thank you for that!
     
     Keep up the Good work!
     
     Best,
     Francisco

406. Rev Tina Redden (2018-08-08) #

     Profound to a point. Don't be hard on yourself. Lot of things we do is very useful to others we just don't know who took out help, advice or instructions.
     
     Like the oak tree never see where the wind water and oft times people carry the acors to but they get planted and grow into more oaks.
     
     
     You've planted a lot of good seeds keep some of that confidence.
     
     
     Rev Tina Redden

407. Jack Abraham (2018-08-08) #

     how do the hyperlinks translate into a book format? Would they become footnotes?
     
     i also questioned if I need to know that 'you got successful?"- more generally, maybe there is a benefit to stripping out some of the clarifications and qualifications(i.e hyper links) and just letting the words be there.
     
     People can do their own homework and test the veracity of your claims. It would be cool if they were encouraged to do so right? This would also tie in nicely the observation in the "This isn't about me" post.
     
     Thanks for inviting the feedback.
     
     J

408. Marwan (2018-08-08) #

     Few thoughts on this Chapter:
     
     Confidence is what you experience with repeated exposure to certain circumstances until you feel like you can handle such circumstances with competence. You described how your Confidence was shaken when you learned new things that shook the foundation of knowledge you thought you had, your self-esteem took a hit. Naval Ravikant has a famous saying:"Self-esteem is just the reputation you have with yourself." In your revelation and conclusions about the difference between having Confidence and Pure Action, you touched on something I heard Debbie Millman discuss on a podcast interview. She said she learned it from Danny Shapiro, " Confidence is overrated, Courage is more important than Confidence." So, as you certainly know, if you read enough and keep in the vicinity of wisdom reading great books, concepts of life philosophy can be found in different words from many sources, and perhaps each person reached the same conclusion from their own set of life lessons and the wisdom that was left after the dust settled. My interpretation for the word confidence is momentum you gain from repeated force of action until you get that flywheel rolling. And yes, no one cares about you as a person, everyone has their own pile of mess to sort out. You touched on another core value, learning without implementation is worthless, but, not everyone has the same pace in life. Like, let me give you an example. Let's say You read from several sources that you must workout to be healthy, but you brush it off, then you learn how all your heroes and role models workout, you think, well, there might be something to that, but you keept it in a drawer in the back of your mind somewhere. And slowly you find out that if you keep your head surrounded by the right kind of thoughts, mentors, inspiration, books, podcasts, etc, you wake up one day and say to yourself, I should go workout, and you actually start working out. My thoughts on implementation of learning and getting to act on the knowledge you collect along the way might be a matter of how immersed are you in that field of knowledge you are trying to absorb, some folks have porous shells, well adapted to that area of expertise and can absorb knowledge easier than others, some have hardened shells that needs to soak in for a while to soften before anything can get through. The trick is in putting oneself in the correct circumstances and being exposed to right kind of thoughts and ideas to make headway. You are, indeed, the average of the 5 people you associate with the most.
     
     Looking forward to the finished product.
     
     All the best.

409. Nishan (2018-08-08) #

     In my vast collection of unread emails, the only emails I immediately open is your emails. Why? Because I know that I'm going to feel great every time when I read one of your posts.
     Now I'm feeling great. Heading out to do my useful work.

410. Les Pardoe (2018-08-08) #

     Further thoughts. Maybe take break, take up hiking,biking,swimming or some such activity , try a different music instrument,play chess, let some air in for yourself. Youre uoing great L.P.

411. Mei (2018-08-08) #

     This comes at the perfect time. I feel like I’m learning more and more but producing less and less. Time to balance it!

412. Helen Welch (2018-08-08) #

     Thank you Derek! Just what I needed to read whilst I’m the middle of producing a new show and so worried what people will think!
     I will share what I know and feel passionate about and if people like it- great! I’m still learning!!
     Great article!

413. julia (2018-08-08) #

     Good point of view, as usual!
     
     I agree, I used to be overly confident with little knowledge or reason to back it up. I find that staying humble and just continuing to work towards learning, self improvement and progress towards my goals keeps me focused and challenged at the same time. It's all about the journey and as you mentioned just trying to contribute to the greater world.

414. Hans L (2018-08-08) #

     I don't think confidence is all bad but it certainly requires contribution for it to be a good thing.
     
     Many businesses and artistic projects are created and brought to fruition because a person develops the confidence that they will see their idea through and ultimately arrive at their desired destination. Confidence can be "I am capable of figuring it out" as opposed to the Arrogance of "I have all the answers." I'd say that the former can be quite useful for finishing any project. But why finish a project if you're not contributing?

415. Chad (2018-08-08) #

     Damn, that's one short chapter! But...succinct and insightful, as always. Well done, Mr. Sivers.

416. Alan Hanslik (2018-08-09) #

     Derek,
     
     Hello again!
     
     For me, it was years ago as well - starting 20 something years up until last year. I was on a fast track, successful and rewarded well as a unique individual leading complex IT team. My confidence was seemed to be built and tied to the value they had in me and the $$ earned. I'm not sure I was naive, but maybe yes after reading your comments. I know that I gave up everything else in my life for this job / career and that seemed ok and fine. As I rose up, became the 'man' and very successful - it certainly changed me and I became ego driven, massively confident in all aspects of my life and all things that go along with that. Wife, family, friends all took back seats and I was unstoppable. Until it ended...
     
     At the time, it didn't matter what I didn't know, who I pissed off and maybe most important, the many ramifications of my actions and attitude towards life and those around me. When that phase of my life ended, it felt like I was ending too.
     
     Paralyzed is a good word and I was also say, that the long previous journey ended and now I needed to find my way down a new path. How does one do that, when their life and essence is tied-up into one thing that sustained you? Well, for me - it was starting over and trying to figure out who I was; became and what I wanted, what was important to me and what I was going to do with my life.
     
     It took time to get past the paralysis phase and to develop strength to dare to try things, take risks and start living a life for myself! For me, which I've been called a Renaissance Man; though I prefer multi-path. I had so many things to choose from and also take on new things to learn and do.
     
     Your comment on learning without doing - which before , when some else was sustaining me was called a hobby, interest or even passion. Now that this could/would become my new life, those ideas to learn things that I couldn't apply or do something real with in my life fell by the wayside. I completely agree; that was such a new revelation and the needed focus to achieve goals in my life.
     
     For me, the this isn't about me... taking the focus away from worrying about what people think, expect along with our normal programming thoughts to overcome is key. It became about taking on and doing something really meaningful for me in my life. Once you realize that and commit to it, then it becomes part of you and you do it for you and because it's a choice you made to live the life you want. Ideally, this is what you love to do - a passion and part of you that you found a way to monetize if necessary or needed. This also dismisses that thoughts of being famous, being known, making millions of dollars, etc. etc. It's about doing something more personal for yourself.
     
     We're all taught, though life has cruel lessons when people are not the same and normal as everyone else. Especially, and maybe truly only for artists. Living a life being an artist, musician or composer is about doing something unique that only you bring. Becoming popular, famous, rich is all serendipity, and way beyond our control anyway. Historically, this does not happen to the most talented, gifted or special of people, but to anyone and everyone. We all have something wonderful to offer and focusing internally and allowing yourself to take risks, be vulnerable and do what you believe in, is what it is about.
     
     So - as usually, your dead-on; and not only know, but have experienced this life lesson that so many haven't yet. To let go of your confidence, to be yourself to honer what you do and take personal and life risks in doing what you want for yourself is living in a deeper way then any other. I don't think we start out thinking that becoming proficient, confident, secure along with success is a mask that we hide behind, but many times it isn't what we're about or what we are truly and how we want to live our lives.
     
     Thanks for insightful and though-provoking words!
     
     -alan

417. Valdy (2018-08-09) #

     So, those that said you'ld never grow up, they were wrong, eh?

418. Sherrill (2018-08-09) #

     How humbly brilliant. Thanks!

419. Steve Mann (2018-08-09) #

     Jeeze, Derek, I think you're being a little too hard on yourself. Life is nothing but a bunch of baby steps. You simply outgrew what you had learned in the past and graduated into a higher level of development. You're very smart and smart people tend to never being satisfied with their accomplishments. Once they've gotten to where they wanted to be, there's always one more rung on the ladder above them. You've got nothing to worry about, Derek. You've accomplished more than most people have. And any naiveté you may have felt was simply a voice telling you to take the next step..........I hope I delivered this right. These kinds of things are complicated.

420. Andres Orjuela (2018-08-09) #

     I've been an obsessive learner as well which also lead me to be stuck. The Tao Te Ching has helped me tremendously with that. Specially Verse 20 which specifically talks about "giving up learning".

421. CYP (2018-08-09) #

     Redefining yourself after the sugar high of your success is not easy.
     Perhaps the pressure from others looking forward to your next success could get to you.
     You have suffered some serious blow in your personal life recently.
     There is no shame in seeking help (e.g., therapy) to sort it all out.
     Perhaps seeking help from friends could be enough for you.
     I am pretty sure every one here is looking forward to a few words of wisdom from you so we could reflect on our own shortcomings.
     Just that is a worthy contribution, even more precious if it is devoid of over confidence.
     You do need some confidence of your worthiness to keep going though.
     Just keep in mind that you have a lot of people that care about you, and most of all, your child, so you are definitely worthy in our eyes.
     
     P.S.: Terribly sorry if I read too much in your blob. If accurate though, please seek help. We are all rooting for you here!

422. Franklin Liao (2018-08-09) #

     Thank you for the thoughts Derek. If I may disagree a bit about part of the heading 'You don't need confidence..." I believe confidence is a catalyst, but not the only, to make a contribution. Whether it be at ones work or personal relationships. Or do you have to make contributions so confidence can be built up?Perhaps you are referring to the fact that confidence can lead to hubris if left unchecked.
     
     Can you help clarify the learning aspect? You mentioned you started to learn after you sold your company. Was there something in particular you sought out to learn? Or do you mean learning to recoup some past mistakes you might have made because of the naiveté that creeped in.
     
     Love the confidence about this not being about me and making sure that contributions are about uniqueness and making sure they bring value to others.

423. Manny Vallarino (2018-08-09) #

     "This isn’t about me. How I feel in this moment doesn’t matter — it will pass. Nobody is judging me, because nobody is thinking of me. They are just looking for things to improve their own life. The public me is not the real me anyway, so if they judge my public persona, that’s fine."
     
     Thank you for writing this, Derek; it's one of those passages I might just have to print out and read every morning. I might have to print out the whole article since it captures an essential principle to keep in mind as a creative. Now I'm wondering...were you feeling confident when you wrote and published this article? :D
     
     Also, if I may pick your brain: don't you think there is some inherent value in learning just for the sake of learning, without necessarily producing anything from it?
     
     Thanks again for writing this!
     
     Manny

424. John (2018-08-09) #

     Morally wrong....hmmm...is it? Is it morally wrong to gather knowledge and not apply it? Is it really immoral to know how to bake a cake, but don't? Just a schniggle tho...Confidence, knowledge, humility, ego, learning, and work. That's big stuff you condensed down to a clear and meaningful points. Nice work as usual.

425. NKC (2018-08-09) #

     Straighten Up & Fly Right

426. CHRIS BELLAMY (2018-08-09) #

     Hey Derek, Good thought in your e-mail. I have been in a similar situation as you describe as "dumb-lucky", highly confident and had total failure! I remember when you did CDbaby which I still use for distrubution and sales. Ya done good man! I don't know any easy way to make a living. I am still a professional touring musician now with 6 #1's in country and we have now gone to the Americana market. You might not know it but you helped with my efforts with the creation of CD Baby. I am also a fishing guide in my off season. My off season is late August until Christmas then I tour mostly south Florida and the Keys. I write 95% of the material on my albums and yes, I still do albums. Music helps people cope. People with positive energy helps me move forward. My motto,"Do something everyday that moves you forward"! I don't think you're stuck. I think you're just thinking cause that is what people like us do, think and then we act. My personal email is [email protected] and my everybody email is [email protected] cell 910-512-0055 websites are www.chrisbellamy.com and www.chrisbellamyfishingcharters.com Take care, move forward and keep thinking! Sincerely, Capt.Chris Bellamy/Chris Bellamy Publishing/ and other things :)

427. David (2018-08-09) #

     Beautiful and brilliant.

428. Rama Ramakrishnan (2018-08-09) #

     Agree 100%. Reminded me of this beautiful Martha Graham quote from her biography " Martha: The Life and Work of Martha Graham" by Agnes de Mille.
     
     "There is a vitality, a life force, an energy, a quickening that is translated through you into action, and because there is only one of you in all of time, this expression is unique. And if you block it, it will never exist through any other medium and it will be lost. The world will not have it. It is not your business to determine how good it is nor how valuable nor how it compares with other expressions. It is your business to keep it yours clearly and directly, to keep the channel open. You do not even have to believe in yourself or your work. You have to keep yourself open and aware to the urges that motivate you. Keep the channel open. "

429. Gong Qian Yang (2018-08-09) #

     Hi Derek,
     
     Thank you for sharing your thoughts! Your confidence and good feel from the earlier time was the result of your successful C D baby business experience which also helped many creative musicians including me. Many of us sincerely considering you as a great friend and a close buddy colleague. It would be nice to find a golden balance between self confidence and overly self criticism. Since confidence is the important "glue" to hold knowledge integratlly together. Enjoy the beautiful valleys and seashore times while eyeing the mountain tops...
     
     Best regards,
     Gong Qian Yang

430. William (2018-08-09) #

     Derek,
     This insight is so helpful to me.
     I have so many ideas but fail to launch because the timing isn't right(perfect) and then I worry what if it doesn't work then what if it does.
     I should just enjoy the process and put out the work, so that I don't feel the guilt of never having tried. If someone finds it useful then - Bonus!
     
     thanks

431. Joe (2018-08-09) #

     Thank you Derek! I need this today. I saw you speak a couple of years ago at World Domination in Portland. You were kind enough to respond to a couple follow up emails. You inspired me then at just the right time - and you just did it again.
     
     This was the added kick I needed to increase my outputs and reduce my inputs – and start contributing!
     
     ! The line "hundreds of hours I spent learning, and not turn it into action" hit me like a big ol' bag of reality! Thanks!!!!

432. Joe Hoff (2018-08-09) #

     Hey Derek
     I love it! The last book of yours I read was pretty amazing and looking forward to reading the new one :)

433. Salvatore Salpietro (2018-08-10) #

     Wise words for anyone.
     
     But especially for those that find or have found (financial) success and need to stay grounded.

434. John Smallios (2018-08-10) #

     Succinct and awesome and I love it. As always, thanks for sharing your unique and useful perspective :)

435. Stephen Anthony Laudise (2018-08-10) #

     I appreciate your honesty, humility and candidness. I got involved with CDBaby while you were still involved. I became aware of CDBaby through my dear friend Mark Riley who introduced me to Kevin and Jess Penner. I was trying to make music available on iTunes and Jess told me go through CDBaby.com which I did. After many years with CDBaby I now realize just being on iTunes, Amazon, Spotify etc does not include me dismissing my responsibility to keep performing and making music just for the pure joy of it. The only reason I ever recorded any of my songs in the first place was to make it possible for my family, friends and neighbors to listen to the songs they liked after I had played for them live and headed back to my home town in Hawaii after I was gone. My fans live in Kenya, England, Italy, Fiji, Germany, New Zealand, USA and God knows where else and thanks to my music being available via CDBaby and download cards and my own personal website I am able to keep a connection and engage them although my personal GPS is thousands of miles away between live performances in their own GPS. Thanks again Derek and please keep being you and doing what you love to do.

436. Dez (2018-08-10) #

     Derek, this is wonderful. But don't you dare taking it as a compliment ;)
     
     I'm on the other side of the chasm, rushing creek yet. No lucky success. But I still get the take a way points perfectly.

437. Waldemir (2018-08-10) #

     All you have expressed is not new, but what really surprises me is how you were incredibly able to discover how to process an internal recognition without anybody guiding you to. By putting that in writing you found a simple and short way to make others to follow your path.
     Congratulations.

438. emilia (2018-08-10) #

     But curiosity never goes
     
     keep strong

439. Joanna "Nicci Tina" Free (2018-08-10) #

     Derek - YES - I feel a MASSIVE relief in the thought that I can just be useful and unique, and release the thought that it matters whether I radiate confidence because lots of days, I don't.
     
     Useful and unique: got that - there's no one else on the planet doing what I do the way I do it, as Nicci Tina, the Ambassador of Buttkicking:)
     
     My sense is that most people could rock their uniqueness and be joyfully useful if they could release the notion that being/looking/etc like anyone else is a desirable state. We each have some sweet something(s) to bring in this world, once we sort out what the heck that is and live it.
     
     Thanks for your example of that, moving from lone nut to leader:)

440. Sean Crawford (2018-08-11) #

     Derek,
     
     as for feedback for your book,
     regarding getting your confidence,
     
     I see you have three bullet points of "thoughts that helped."
     I immediately think of syndicated advice columnist Ann Landers, sister of Dear Abby, saying that for so many people she has compassion for how they manage to get out of bed in the morning. She meant figuratively, not literally, that this is so hard to do.
     
     You yourself manage to take action with these three points, but to some degree these are the points that specifically help you. Perhaps they are made up excuses, but for you they work.
     
     You might want to humbly advise others that it is OK for them to find their own reasons to have enough confidence to act and learn.
     
     For example, some one might resonate with the Martha Graham's quote, as noted by Rama at comment #432.

441. Kenny Feinberg (2018-08-11) #

     Happiness or creating value in what you do or in the moment like lemonade from lemons. Even if we're not happy, we can be.

442. Richard Young (2018-08-11) #

     Confidence is good; arrogance is bad. It's great to know that at least part of what you are doing works well, especially when you are so busy that taking time to think and analyze must wait a bit. Productive people need to have confidence.
     
     On the other hand, arrogance is a block to the changes that make us more productive and life more exciting. Arrogance blocks being able to see opportunities.
     
     CD Baby is a really great idea implemented with openness and humor. It opens opportunities to many artists looking for an outlet for distribution of their work. You will always be appreciated for the help you have given so many talented people.
     
     What would be the possibility that you might distribute other products from start-up operations? For example, my daughter has a start-up company that is working great locally, but needs to break into a larger market. Of course, Amazon and Ebay do this kind of thing, but there is little or no guidance. A select number of producers could benefit from your experience in developing markets for them. Let me know if you are interested.

443. Alfred Anthony (2018-08-11) #

     I have subscribed to your posts for quite a while but this is one entry that seemed to really address my particular writers block. Thank you. "Just Do It" huh

444. Todd Ellis (2018-08-11) #

     Hi Derek,
     
     I really like the learning without doing point. I feel like another point under the "times to act" umbrella is also to do things when you are feeling the urge to. I put off starting a second company so I could experience the novelty of working on an oyster farm for the summer. I told myself that I would simply start it at the end of the season. Now that I am getting to the end of the job, I no longer have the drive because all of the information, mindsets, and momentum I had from the books I was reading, etc. at the beginning of the summer are now gone. Rather than having the resolve and direction, I find myself lost at sea and wishing I had done it when it was fresh.
     
     You write it all very cleanly and concisely, wrapped up with a nice food analogy. Great work and thanks for sparking this meditation.
     
     -Todd

445. Lawrence (2018-08-11) #

     Hey Derek,
     
     I love it. I have no constructive criticism. Perfectly written and so useful to me right now since I sometimes feel paralysed in my own discipline for the same reasons.
     
     Regards,
     Lawrence

446. Miranda (2018-08-12) #

     Hey Derek,
     
     I found this piece very mature for lack of a better word. This idea that we can feel successful and satisfied without making millions or gaining the approval of others is tricky to put into words that actually sound real. Usually, the idea feels too far away to touch. However, the way you wrote it sound like something a high school kid would say...real. Nice one

447. Eli (2018-08-12) #

     I LOVE this! Each of those three points is absolutely spot on and crucial. Thanks for all you do

448. Tim Nenninger (2018-08-13) #

     Man, you always bring such a wonderful perspective to life. Thank you for your contribution... this is something I needed to hear right now.

449. Dave Nelson (2018-08-13) #

     I would like someone who understands jazz to honestly review my cd's. I've gotten rave reviews but I'm tired of trying to sell myself.
     
     A gig in NYC will convince musicians and audiences I can get the job done.
     
     My website is davenelsonjazz.com, where I am doing a cd with the great Javon Jackson.
     Is it time to give up or time to move ahead?
     
     Best.
     
     Dave

450. Chris Magryta (2018-08-14) #

     I liken your revelations with the events that follow many successful Nobel laureates. The ignorance of youth and desire to succeed often trump self reflection and paralysis that follow success. Now that the world's eyes are upon you, the success is more scrutinized in one's mind making it more difficult to be carefree with decisions. Remaining ignorant to self over reflection is a gift and liberates the mind to push the boundaries as you did.
     
     I take a slight issue with "dumb lucky" as hard work and successful implementation of that work in the right era is not a lucky event as much as work induced fortune.

451. RJ (2018-08-14) #

     It's weird that I agree but it's hard to actually practice it. People are so used to being self conscious and think that everyone's eyes are on them. Sometimes I have that feeling but sometimes I don't.
     
     I just wish it would be a lot easier to just focus on what you want and totally ignore feedback and what the world thinks.

452. Peter Bevelin (2018-08-14) #

     Derek, You have summarized the key in 3 sentences. Brilliant!

453. Wayne (2018-08-15) #

     I'm still trying to sort out what my little contribution looks like...

454. Paris (2018-08-15) #

     "The public me is not the real me anyway, so if they judge my public persona, that’s fine."
     
     Dude, that one hit me between the eyes. Being a struggling author trying to manage and promote my "persona" it's crazy how easy it is to get swept up in what people do or don't think about that persona. And that's not even the real me!

455. Roberto Montes (2018-08-16) #

     When you build momentum, it feels like you’re moving in the present. As in it doesn’t when you break momentum. Thinking about others hinders momentum.

456. Peter Fegredo (2018-08-16) #

     Rudyard Kipling wrote in his poem "IF" If you can dream and not make dreams your master. If you can think and not make thoughts your aim. If you can meet with triumph and disaster. Just treat these two impostor's just the same.

457. bmw (2018-08-16) #

     Derek - It would be interesting to me to have more details regarding your "fall uphill" and how it came out alright. I'm glad that you continued to learn to the point of coming to your grand conclusion. May all your projects be unique and useful...

458. Glo (2018-08-19) #

     I am unique too! Unique is GOOD! :)

459. Bill Gottlieb (2018-08-20) #

     These insights are thoughtful and meaningful. Thank you Derek for taking the time process this information and share it with all of us. In thinking about your conclusions I'm fascinated by the process by which I am able to internalize important lessons. Why is it that sometimes I can grasp onto an idea or principle to help me be better and sometimes they just read like self-help posters that seem so generalized they fail to capture me. One thing I think helps me take meaningful ideas from the pile of "good external advice" to "lives inside me" is the power of parable. Stories help me so much. I think it's time for a new generation of Aesop's Fables called "Sivers' Stories". I'd read that.

460. Christopher Tighe (2018-08-21) #

     Derek,
     
     Great work as always!
     
     I struggle with teaching my team to find the balance between enough knowledge to take action and having enough knowledge before taking action.
     Each person is different and the balance is unique to the experiences of life they have had.
     Have you given this any thought?
     What about overcoming the fear of rejection
     ?
     
     Just curious... I appreciate all you do!
     
     Chris

461. ryosei (2018-08-22) #

     Insightful as always, thanks for sharing. Just what I needed to hear at this moment.

462. Don Haynie (2018-08-24) #

     Beautiful perspective. Somehow that connects to a line from a Sherlock Holmes story, where he tells Watson he has no idea how many planets there are, or what their names are--and doesn't want to know--because it would serve no purpose in his work. But he could tell you what part of town the mud on your boots came from. Says the brain is like an attic, has only so much room, and the stuff there should be useful. I don't fully subscribe to that, but it has merit for sure.

463. Bruna Martinuzzi (2018-08-27) #

     Insightful and inspiring as always. I paused for a moment to choose the most important point for me out of the three but couldn't because they all apply. I also love the metaphors/analogies you use, Derek: "A useful counter-melody in the big orchestra of life" and "Like throwing good food in the trash." Thank you for sharing and best wishes with the new book. I look forward to reading it.

464. Bregje (2018-08-28) #

     It's like being number 468, one of many, unimportant, unread, enough reasons to 'not do' - but still I write!

465. Vail Hayes (2018-09-02) #

     👍 What you write is like talking a master class.

466. Phil (2018-09-03) #

     Sounds like your early success was partially based on luck and timing, but you definitely added your blood, sweat and tears, plus your unique style.
     
     Maybe the success pattern is involving yourself in a rising tide (you have to have interest in it), working really hard, plus sprinkling your personality into it.
     
     Then let go and don’t care if it succeeds or fails as long as you’re enjoying the journey?
     
     Who knows... lol.
     
     Thanks for sharing.

467. Damir (2018-09-05) #

     Love this!
     "If I can do something that people find useful, then I should. It doesn’t matter if it’s a masterpiece or not, as long as I enjoy it."

468. D. Carr (2018-09-06) #

     I agree and in a way so did Ralph Waldo Emerson.
     
     “The purpose of life is not to be happy. It is to be useful, to be honorable, to be compassionate, to have it make some difference that you have lived and lived well.”

469. Fadel Ramadan (2018-09-06) #

     How I reached here is a story itself ! I'm 31 years working as engineer in a job that I hate , I just resigned my job then my boss release me for unpaid leave and withdraw the resignation , WHAT should I do in my life ? for almost the last 8 years I've been asking the same question , finally I knew it's not about me , it's about give and give and give
     I read a lot and I have good credentials but I'm not using , my action now, share the knowledge and inspire others :)
     
     How I reached here :
     I was following Conor Neil blog , then Florian Mueck then I found John Zimmer who mentioned you in one of his posts , I'm glad that browsing landed me here
     many thanks for your post it really got me
     
     Fadel

470. Niki Shmikis (2018-09-10) #

     This is funny to hear from you "Unfortunately I was lucky and got successful, so that kept me ignorant of my shortcomings."
     
     You were creative, considerate, resourceful, and connected, and was thinking differently too. A guy who persistently participated in the conferences with a plain table, talking with people and handing out flyers for several years in a row, was not just lucky, he was fortunate as a surfer catching an epic wave.
     
     https://sive.rs/novc

471. Neil A (2018-09-11) #

     If you don't value someone else's opinion of you, then it really doesn't matter what anyone else thinks. There will always be someone who is better than you at some particular skill or activity. So what? Doing the best you can at the time you're doing it is enough. Let others polish their criticism.
     
     If I may be gently contrary, learning without doing is not wasted. The doing can be mental and may help you avoid missteps or mistakes. Focusing on action only dismisses a large range of human experience. Sometimes I read a book to discover what someone else thinks or has experienced. Is that time wasted? Sometimes I try something to see how I feel about it, good, bad or indifferent. Sometimes I write just to see what flows from the tip of the pen. Did all of it lead to action? No. Was it wasted? No, it was discovering the joy of being human, of exploring byways just for the pleasure of exploring.
     
     I think you've come to another road that will prove fruitful, one that skates past the hasty opinions and ungentle judgments of others. Welcome to the open road!

472. Ramesh K J (2018-09-17) #

     Well said "Learning without doing is wasted", this one thing in which we all fall quite often, due to the nature of the work or circumstance. We need to be careful before taking any such learnings or we need to be clear and focused.
     
     The work is the point, and my work is unique - This reminds me of a saying in an old text "Don't expect the fruit of your work just keep doing the good work". This shows how one is dedicated and sincere towards his/her work.
     
     I love that you are stressing on these lines, which are very much required in this fast world.
     
     Regards & Best Wishes
     - Ramesh K J

473. Michael (2018-09-25) #

     Can't imagine you without confidence. Would be interesting to hear stories of you on the couch, eyeliner running, and a bucket full of chocolate ice cream. Er... whatever your equivalent was. I'm sure it was just an internal struggle but even expanding on that for a sentence or two would help the reader visualize and relate. Because it's hard to believe tbh. Then again, people often describe me as overly confident when I feel anything but sometimes. Guess that just adds to your public v.s. personal persona thing.
     
     Thanks and keep up the good work.

474. KARTIC V (2018-09-27) #

     Brilliant. Resonates with my own experiences too.

475. Alexandra (2018-09-27) #

     I also developed a healthy humility with age and maturity. In one biography I read a statement that “humility is truth.” What do you think of that? It is also about not declaring false humility.

476. Michael Pickett (2018-09-28) #

     Hey Derek... It's taking me awhile to come back to your (awesome) posts, but thought I'd drop you a line. This is a fantastic set of insights. I get paralyzed at times too...and I work to push myself through it, so that I 'make something'. Then I push to share it, where applicable, because who knows who else might get something out of it. :)
     
     thanks man! Great stuff...

477. Emmet Van Driesche (2018-10-04) #

     Really liked this Derek, thanks for articulating this truth. I see this all the time in the spooncarving community, people afraid to share what they know because they are second guessing the value of their contributions. Just found out about you in Tim Ferris' book, I've really enjoyed what I've learned about you so far.

478. Joshua (2018-10-12) #

     Thank you! I can really relate to this - just without the great early success haha

479. Charlie North (2018-10-17) #

     I took a break from your blog for a while, but I just came to have a look at what you're up too. Glad I did. I should print this off and stick over my desk. Bang on Derek! I don't always agree with you, but that's very important. I don't want an echo chamber. Crucially, I respect your ideas (always have); that gives me something to bounce off, to wrestle with. Thanks for that. As always. :)

480. Rags (2018-10-29) #

     You found it! Great article

481. Selim (2018-11-06) #

     "I continued learning until I felt like an absolute idiot." That exactly is how I feel now. Every time I talk longer to somebody, I'm impressed with that so many people now nearly nothing.
     But at the same time I have the impression, sciolism-people bring "it" much further, why I fell more and more as if I knew nothing at all.

482. Viviana (2018-11-13) #

     Such refreshing reflections. I am grateful for your journey, and the impulse that makes you share it. How lucky I am that it arrives right in my inbox. What a day to be alive.
     I want to do likewise.
     
     It was great: "I continued learning until I felt like an absolute idiot" HAHAHA How brilliant.
     
     Love,
     
     Viviana

483. Ken (2018-11-14) #

     Awesome stuff Derek! You're living an inspired life which has an impact on those who hear your message.

484. Ni Palavi (2018-11-18) #

     "...my little contribution to the world..." -D. Sivers
     
     and thanks for taking the leap, Derek, as it helps us who are of similar disposition (or at least the "public" disposition you chose to show the world).

485. Sasha Crespi (2018-11-20) #

     “Nobody is judging me, because nobody is thinking of me”
     
     I LOOOOOVE this. Will be making your blog a go to; you’re one of my favorite thinkers!
     
     PS: Just read Anything You Want. Carrying it with me EVERYWHERE for the next year (I’m a touring Magician and live out a duffle bag, Anything You Want is an exception to my minimalism!).

486. Brent (2018-11-26) #

     Right on point. I am constantly learning with intermittent bouts of action. Thanks Derek,
     
     Brent

487. Robert (2018-12-01) #

     Enjoyed the article, Derek.
     
     I came to the realization through 30 years of personal struggle that self-confidence is earned through experimentation and failure. Fail so many times, in so many different ways, and you learn three things:
     
     1) failing isn't the end of the world
     2) failing is a requirement for learning
     3) if you keep thinking and working you can overcome almost any obstacle

488. Hilaire (2019-01-11) #

     I have been accused of being “dumb-lucky” but I have been unlucky. People do not know what I did to have what I do now. They never saw you at your lowest and they should not be in your life.

489. Lauren Nash (2019-01-11) #

     Loved this post! The comment "learning without doing is wasted". So many times I have studied something never to use it! There is no worse feeling than that.
     
     Currently I'm in a creative academy - The Maestro Conservatory - that has really helped me take all my passions and learning and put them into action! It's been super helpful and eye opening for me.
     
     Here is the link: http://bit.ly/maestroprogram
     
     Thanks again for the article! Here's to contribution.

490. GENEVIEVE (2019-01-27) #

     A very quiet post. You have different goal now, a good one. Just a couple of days ago I directed someone at your blog because I thought she might find it useful. From a simple smile to a profound essay, we never know how much our behaviour or work will impact another human.

491. Laurence (2019-01-28) #

     Some people never realise life is not a competition. Just like some never realise happiness. You can only do what is possible and hope your example is of use to others in some way. You still have confidence but by not focusing on the ‘competition’ you have more inner peace. Your confidence affords you to care less about something’s but allows you not to be careless. It is part of your overall judgement barometer/ scale - a device we constantly adjust and recalibrate during this journey/ joke/ game of life. The point is participate and play the game by doing your best. You seem to be playing well with others so far and getting the balance right. Time is precious waste it wisely...🙄😎

492. Elle (2019-03-04) #

     I love this. Thank you, you've contributed greatly to my day.

493. Jackie Morris (2019-03-08) #

     So very, very true!!!! Thank you for sharing that. It's very synchronistic for me, and so beautifully articulates what I have been working towards at this point in my life.

494. Jerod (2019-06-20) #

     What I got from this post:
     
     Just do the work, in spite of how you feel.
     To over-focus on how you feel, or how you think others think of you, that's just selfish, pointless distraction.
     Produce results, and keep focus on that.
     
     Great advice for the neurotic creative. Thank you.

495. ejj (2019-06-27) #

     From the movie, "Eddie & The Cruisers:"
     
     Sal, the bass player:
     "Eddie... you're wrong. You're wrong! Now listen to me. I love you.
     I've known you longer than anyone else. But you're wrong.
     They want 'On The Dark Side'!
     What are we giving 'em, some damn opera?
     I don't know even know what you're after."
     
     Eddie Wilson:
     "I want something great, I want something that nobody's ever done before.
     
     Sal:
     "Why? We ain't great. We're just some guys from Jersey!"
     
     Eddie:
     "If we can't be great,
     then there's no sense In ever playing music again, Sal."
     
     Derek seems to belie this.
     I feel kind of stuck in the middle...
     Good excerpt. Thanks for posting that. I can relate to both. — Derek

496. James Laino (2019-07-03) #

     This is both very true in my experience as well as being satisfyingly succinct. However, I feel conflicted because I like 100th monkey style theories. For instance, Rupert Sheldrake's Morphogenetic Field theory suggests that all learning is applied the moment it is acquired, if not by you personally than by a similar being within the Morphogenetic Field.

497. John Parker (2019-07-05) #

     Hi Derek,
     
     I just re-read this blog (I have it linked in my journal. Today I clicked it again. Yay!)
     
     I love your vulnerabilty and candor.
     
     Yesx4 in my own life to your first four paragraphs! Yes!!!!
     
     And, thank you for three bullet points too! Spot on!
     
     Plus, Amen! to the final line. As St. Paul wrote, "...when I am weak, then I am strong." Not fun but totally true! That's when I humble down and listen and the joy returns.
     
     Thank you, Derek!
     John

498. Shaz Jones (2019-09-27) #

     True. And the work is always there. Even when others leave.

499. Sushill Shyam Sundar (2019-10-12) #

     Another brilliant thought
     Sushill

500. PHILIP NG (2019-10-19) #

     Great thoughts. I think sometimes I wish we can unlearnt and just be plain old simply lucky. Humor, humor.

501. tijl (2020-09-06) #

     In reply to comment #497
     
     Ejj, comparing yourself to others is good if it gives you drive but in the end it's always best to have the "inner scorecard"
     Am I better than yesterday? Am I better than last month etc.
     
     In the end it's all about extrinsic (best in the world) vs intrinsic (best version of me) motivation... the intrinsic one seems to be the more "successful" one to take in general.