Love this one! It's a gem. As a father this is the kind of self-awareness I hope to instill in my children. I will share it with them. Thank you Derek...and that writing project is still working its way around my brain ;-)

derek..thanks for the words of wisdom...

If being wrong is wrong, I don't want to be right.

The one bit of advice I wish I had 2 years ago was summed up nicely with one of your lines at the end:

"Expect the criticism in advance."

It's crazy how much you'll get the farther up you climb. And if you give into it, they win, and you'll fall right back down to their level.

Like always Derek, even with your short blog posts, they're insanely insightful. Please keep it up :)
Thanks! Yeah, it's funny how we all have this tendency to let a thousand compliments slide right past us, but a single criticism gets all our attention. ☺ Learning to ignore that tendency is priceless. — Derek

EXACTLY Derek. all those ideas and opinions can swirl around inside your head and throw you off when you least expect it. Better to address them all personally, internally, determine what you personally value, and then live in peace knowing their are certain things that are all yours.

That you need not be swayed or influenced by others perceptions, judgements, endless barage of negative beliefs, etc.

Right on.

a nice balanced commentary ... i enjoyed reading ... for those musicians who are a bit outside the genre of the day box ...important .... i realized the other day when i had played a song a wrote years ago (called too esoteric ) ...on a radio show i was doing and the phone lines ..lit up with compliments ... was i ahead of my time?
blessings
jimbeau

I think the reaction too depends on the person and their life beliefs and experiences. My sister and I are both inclined to be pleasers to a fault. She would like to come out of it but will never do it because to her people are more important than her. I still feel that way but try not to do it to a fault because I deserve happiness too. What makes each of us complete and happy is different and thank God we're not a bunch of clones! I do me. You do you. I'm good with that.
Great point! People-pleasing (or lack of) is another important trait to know your preference towards. Thanks for mentioning that one. — Derek

Brilliant essay. Very fitting photograph. *speechless*
*bow*

Thanks Derek! Awesome!

Me an my friend jay were just talking about the same thing.
thanks for chiming in.
I totally feel you on this.

I LOVE this photo, haha!!

I have thought you were a very wise man, long before now: back into 1999 when you were running CD Baby. Then the company cared about its customers. Not today. Everything there today is slick, mechanical, rehearsed (especially the coldness on the phone) and i just don't use it any more. it's over priced, and now they want to do the job of a PRO instead of offering a copyright registration service.

Too bad there isn't a CD baby service for THE SONGWRITER. Not the singer-songwriter. Just the songwriter who composes, but doesn't sing. I have a dear friend named Richard Sherman, of Sherman Brothers fame. He's an amzing songwriter. But he couldn't sing twenty years ago, and he can't sing without coughing, today. Isn't there something out there to show case the great songwriters like Dick, like Jerry Herman, like Alan Menkin.

God bless you, Derek. Boy are you missed! this was an amzing piece of writing! Michael Ricciardi

Some may say you're right, some may say you're wrong.
Some may notice but say nothing, some may not notice at all.
☺ — Derek

Thank-you for that bit of advice! Im so glad I found your site, your a very wise man!!

This was spot on for me. Exquisite timing. An author, vocalist, teacher, speaker. With background in corporate America, I struggle with what I bring in an attempt not to bring too much. Instead to focus on 2 of my strengths and keep it simple and effective. I am recording Audio Blogs about "real life'. My nitch is being completely transparent so that others cam learn from my mistakes, victories and struggles. It is my desire to help others pick up their dreams and run through their fear and cross the finish line of courage. Thank you Derek for this timely word. I LOVE IT!

The older I get, the easier it is to say: "Yeah, that's who I am" no apology, no explanation.

Love this article so true!!!

....& collectively we make life varied, fascinating & inspiring.

I have a finance degree I've never used. It's been three years since I've graduated. I have no income.

But I'm launching a business in less than a month, and soft-launching another business, in addition to my blog, which is growing fast.

But when I'm asked what I do or what I'm doing, I feel like it's impossible to explain my situation and plans in a way that would be accepted as "smart" or "prudent." And heck, maybe it isn't prudent. Maybe I'm being stupid by not getting a "real job." But this is what I want to do, so I've got to give it a shot before I settle for less.

In other words, this article rang true for me. Thanks Derek.

nothing replaces," being you" happiness then is effortless :)

Wonderful read Derek.

I've been following your passages, book suggestions, et al. I always get something useful from each. I don't always get back to you, however, just know that I appreciate it. Knowledge is priceless. Especially in this business. We do need thick skin and must have an absolute passion for what we do! That will get is through any criticism.
Thanks again Derek!

LOVE LOVE LOVE. Thanks for shining in your brilliance and lighting the way for the rest of us. :)

So much freedom in creating for yourself what is supposed to be. Makes folks angry but takes courage to stand in your space and let them just deal with it.

So much of the statement is true but I would also like to add another observation. It is the easiest action in the world to criticise another's efforts or work. So many do not understand that talent, ability, is simply not enough it has to be combined with a sustained determination and work ethic. Consequently the critics only see the end product, they never understand or comprehend the struggle and difficult journey that lies behind the creation of work that may be innovative and have quality. A true creative will refine and polish their work, their talent and ability over a long gestation period. Each new work to fountain the lessons learnt by the previous efforts, to harness life's experience, with talent, technique, single minded determination in the hope that each moment will add to their creative energy. We exist in a society of observers where dedicated, determined, creative minds are still rare. To observe is to make judgement, but always time will be the arbiter of quality, never the judgement of the moment.
Good point. Thank you! — Derek

As I've gotten older, (I'm 40) and I've gotten really comfortable in my skin and my quirks. For the longest, I've said that I'm a check writer but I'm not one who will be in the charitable trenches. But charities need people like me.

I recently wrote a book and admitted that in some areas I am a coward and I'm okay with it. In fact, we are all cowards in some area; we just don't want to admit it. You are 100% right. Someone will always find the "wrong" in the "right" of you authentically are.

Like many I always eagerly wait DS's next offering. I'm never disappointed and just know I'm not alone.

An adjunct thought. To get out of difficulty you have to be in difficulty. Particularly from all the sideline naysayers.

Then it becomes time to move on.

You are oh so wrong!

Hi Derek,
Thank you for making my day.
These are the words I live by, my father instilled them in me from an early age, when I was not as capable as others.

" But if you expect this criticism in advance, and take pride in your stance, you can bash on with a smile, being who you want to be.

Then every time they say you’re wrong, that’s a sign you’re doing it right.' I still have people say these words to me!.

Derek, Thank you for these insights! Thanks you for empowering the unique in favor of the uniformity !

Hello Derek, I hope everything is going great with you. I always appreciate the inspiring messages that you send for me to read, and I enjoyed this one as well.

Thank-You for sharing, Derek! It's always ice to hear your thoughts. So true. We are all individuals. It's interesting how our differences weaves into our interconnectedness. ; )

Once there was a thinker
This thinker had a thought ...

There was another thinker ...
With another thought ...

Then these two thinkers met ...
And ...

Good it made me think.

This resonates with me. Have come to accept that I'm an introvert and quite happy living on minimal income, provided I have time to work at music every day. That's wealth, to me. Recently I've come to sense this feeling of mission that's been with me so long - it's popularly held in the phrase "to change the world." Why do we think that way? Isn't it enough to simply participate in the world. Thirty years ago I heard a poet at a reading say, "I hope that you aren't slow to know when language lops off a bit of your freedom." Slow is better than not at all. Blessings, Derek. Your thoughts are good company.

Easier said than done

This makes me wonder....How did you like the movie "The Social Network" ? People, like yourself, re defining workplace reality and biz models....or not at all like yourself?
Hmm... some of both. Not so ambitious. My slogan: “A billion dollars isn't cool. You know what's cool? A MILLION dollars!” ☺ — Derek

Seek to understand!
Judging, projecting, labeling, condemning, expulsion, exclusion, whispers, discussions behind the back - how does this serve? How would it feel to be on the receiving on this for those who are doing the finger pointing? Would it help to progress you into a better place or crumple your motivation and sense of belonging and connectedness? When we throw others away, we are also throwing part of our own humanity away, so we are no longer whole.
Thank you for the post, Derek. I thought it was rather affirming. And that, is a rather nice space.
I am grateful for your generous heart.

And, we change as we mature.

That is a bold hermit crab. One might say a bit exhibitionistic. Joe.

Derek, This is so on point. I appreciate you taking the time to write this. I'm going to print this out and put it on my wall. Again, thank you.

RR

. . .except when you're doing it wrong. An example from the world of finance: If you take two one dollar bills into your bank and fill out a deposit slip that says, "$5,432.19," your teller is going to say, "You're wrong. One plus one equals two." If you stand there and argue that the teller telling you that you are wrong is a sign that you did it right, you're going to look like an idiot. It's not a very popular philosophy these days, but there is such a thing as wrong. Someone may disagree with me, and if so, you have confirmed the previous sentence by saying I am wrong to believe that there is such a thing as wrong. When my first piano teacher taught me a C major scale and I accidentally threw an F# in there, she said, "The C major scale has an F natural. You played it wrong." I couldn't argue with that. If she had asked me to play a C lydian scale, I would have been right. C lydian cannot be C major under another name. A C major scale with an F# is wrong. It becomes C lydian at that point. Why has our world become so scared of the word "Wrong?" Sometimes the best way to get to the right place is to admit that you are wrong. The Colonel went through hundreds of wrong fried chicken recipes before he found the right one. Relativism may comfort some people, but the moments in my life that I have denied the possibility that I could be wrong, I have looked like a complete idiot.

I must be doing it right, then

Be-you-ti-full. I'm actually experiencing a little of that recently. THANKS for sharing. I think it's also connected to how much (or little) we value our self. I'm excited about my "Healing America" project on rockethub crowdfunding platform. All my best! Jeffrey G.

Hey, ho nice!
I would add one more advice. Expect the biggest criticism from people you would expect the least. When going from working career to new one and from old habits to new ones, you break the molds of people about you. For parents and family we can be prepared but all others, (friends, girlfriend, partners) they slap you with "rationality".

Oh, I hate that word today... :)
/cheers

Love this, Derek! (Perfect photo for it, as well!)

I realised this once when I thought about Bill Gates, the world's richest man (at the time), and how even he cops criticism. I figured that it didn't matter if you were "doing it right", someone somewhere will always complain.

-Stolzy

"The entrepreneur who’s not into money."

That's me.

And you're right. Many people I speak with don't get it, and have to explain myself.

Have a few of those t shirts

my only complaint is, why didn't you post this fifteen years ago :)

Thanks Derek. I like the "taking pride in your stance" part. We do our thing, and satisfaction comes from within. We still can share the joy of the process with each other. And "bash on with a smile".

I'm a guitarist who avoids crowds. I miss playing out but dedicate hours each day to the guitar. I also teach students 7 days a week. It's a busy schedule. I've played guitar 50 years and with the exception of missing the playing out part think I have the perfect life.

Love the essay. Absolutely love the photo.

Thanks for sharing very true

> Then every time they say you’re wrong, that’s a sign you’re doing it right.

loved this :) thanks !

That hit it right on the head, Derek. I just want to write and produce. I don't want to be in the spotlight. I really don't want to have to perform. Just lock me away in my studio and let me crank out good tunes. I've gotten criticism from all sides. But subconsciously, I refuse to waiver. I know that if I get one song in to the right hands, hands that understand my vision, and is willing to fund that vision, then it would have all been worth it. Good timely article, Derek, just what I needed to hear.

For some strange reason, I've always taken pride when someone tells me that I am "doing it wrong". Especially when I wind up succeeding anyway!

It really doesn't matter what anyone says or thinks as far as an individuals personal choices in life. Sometimes you are the only one who sees your visions of the future and the directions that life takes you. Believe in yourself as far as music is concerned .. I would never have accomplished anything if i had listened to everyone who told me .. i was wrong.

The above website is as close to a personal site as I know how to make. I am a composer of jazz and classical music and a jazz pianist a la Bill Evans. The long and the short of it is I've been waging a fruitless battle to get my music out there, but with little success. Despite winning competitions, having three recordings available, even two broadcasts featuring my music on KUSC-FM in L.A. over 10 years ago, nothing has come from my efforts. I feel I need a producer or manager to help me, but I'm 70 now, so I have little hope of obtaining that help. All the advice on how to proceed is just too overwhelming for me to grasp. I just don't know what to do. I send all these Mp3s out and get no acknowledgement from anyone... It's really depressing. I would be glad to send examples of my work out to you, or Google me to see what works of mine are available. Sorry for the sob story, but thanks for reading. Best, Michael Deak

Derek, when I get these e-mails from you, I know I am in for a treat. In this instance, I not only understand this post, I'm grateful to you for informing people who never knew this before. I think there are lots of them.

As for me, I had wonderful parents. They did not teach to succeed in life, get a job, or make a lot of money. Instead, I was taught how to live my life.

I was raised to tell the truth, treat others like I want to be treated, am no better than anyone else and no one else is better than me, and not to care what the world nor anyone in it thinks of me.

Much of my life has been spent in elective office.

So truly agree. I define myself a an introvert marketer! That's an irony for someone in itself. But i have found my space (unless i know i am doing good work) and i am trying to be comfortable with it. Thank you for always posting something inspiring.

Although I have some different experiences, it seemed like rivals had something to say about stuff etc. but rather getting the grasp of things. Still have to wonder if it was the path or need something different... We shall see.

When can we talk... you'll be happy we did.

I'm building something big... and it's working - I need help - I think you'll like.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X9Kdj4eaZjU

it almost sounds like were coming full circle. Just be yourself.

You said: " funny how we all have this tendency to let a thousand compliments slide right past us, but a single criticism gets all our attention. Learning to ignore that tendency is priceless. " Thanks Derek. I will pass this along to my students. Big info in a small package .

The musician who avoids crowds: Izzy Stradlin'.

Awesome post, love this

Derek you are a well of wisdom.

I was analyzing the psychological reasons behind this by introspection, and I think there's something to do with your brain trying to repel every little thing that is different from you somehow. It's there for a reason, so I guess that was probably useful 50,000 years ago. I've realized that whenever you're trying to convince someone or trying to make them understand you, the way to do it is by showing them that deep deep down, you're not so different after all. I really wish more people would realize this. For instance, when you think about a thief, your mind says "Man, I really hate that guy. I would never do such a thing". But maybe he was just trying to feed his family. And that is something you would do.

heard a great lyric this weekend on a mountain bike film 'roam' that went "i used to be a lot like you,
now i'm a lot like me!'
which was cool, & not relevant for teens only; we adults can struggle with the crowd shit too!

Makes me think about where I fit and double think of where I want/need to be :) Thanks for sharing Derek!
Sonie

Einstein said it best. "Great spirits have always met with violent resistance from mediocrities."

Word! Human nature has 'decided' that we're all wrong, especially when you're watching somebody else going about their business :)

You are right.lovely

The picture of the hermit crab is inspirational. Thank you.

Many people told me I was crazy when I started BrewPony. Yet another coffee club? How will you deal with returns? Do you know anything about this industry?

We are now kicking ass and taking names :)

I'm into alittle bot of everything and keep what I'm passionate about private . Money beats not having it . Experienced both. Power I feel can be used better when money can't buy humanity's ect . Using power right is key as for poets writers ect we also emerge from seculsions of peace tO adventure and mysterys of life when we can .

Thank you for sharing, Derek. This is very reassuring - one must believe in oneself, even when criticized. This doesn't mean there isn't room for improvement of course. One must also not want to please other people: you are entitled to be "wrong" according to others!

Thank you for always being positive.

Kindest regards
Engela

Very Encouraging

Thx. Keep 'em coming. I am listening.

Very interesting perspective. Excellent food for thought on this Monday morning. Thank you. Charlie

I don't usually comment. I got on your list by helping my husband launch an album through Discmakers. From there I discovered CDBaby. I sang on a couple tracks. I'm a massage therapist. I homeschool and "home church" my son. Anyone who finds out my business immediately criticizes me with the classic attack on homeschooling: "What about socialization?" I am turned off both by the arrogance and ineptitude of the public school system, and by organized religion. "Have you tried charter schools?" Oh, the constant criticism masked as unsolicited advice...

Everyone plays different roles in a day,week,month,year and lifetime...and they need to exhibit the NEEDED traits to be the best. All this will require and efficient and seamless CHARACTER switching to don different hats. All this switching will require intangible qualities like, open-mindedness, tolerance, humility, etc. I always feel, in real life, one need to display the qualities and performance of a great reel life actor. If we are a good actor, we should be pretty fine at things we do. And of course we need to neglect the negative headwinds that are directed our way.

Many years ago I choose to follow my passion of music and not my choosen career of electrical engineering- I've been broke but never poor- I'm rich with experience and many great friends- Someone asked me just yesterday if I ever regretted my choice of going on the road as a musician Instead of following the wealth That would've come from following my engineering degree- I said the wealth of experience traveling as a musician was worth many times more than any college degree And I'm very happy today making a living in the music world- But as you may know at the time many of my family and friends said I was wrong- ts

Hey man, you hit the nail right on the head with this post! This came at just the right time for me. I myself am an aspiring rapper/producer with a tad bit of skin in the game (nothing major yet but I've done performances in multiple cities & states), but I've been on hiatus for a while as I'm trying to regroup and get things together to make a bigger push.

At my current job, a couple of people literally think it's hilarious that I'm a rapper and will not take me seriously because I'm not like your everyday typical gangsta rapper. I'm a nerd, I'm an atheist, I'm (mostly) professional when I'm at work, I'm really into politics/science/philosophy/etc., and though I'm from the hood on the south side of Chicago, I could care less about bein hard. It gets a bit frustrating sometimes cuz I've been doing it for a long time, and I feel I'm constantly getting better everyday, honing my craft and learning more techniques, yet people won't even give me a chance & hear me out before writing me off as a joke.

It can be really discouraging at times, but at the end of the day, I love music too much to quit. I've seen so many success stories of people reaching success in their respective fields after being rejected scores of times. People like Larry King, Kanye West, Richard Branson, Jay-Z and countless others inspire me to keep doing what I'm doing despite what others say. I really appreciate this post Derek, this actually helped me feel better about things. Keep doin' what you do man! B-E-Z

According to your last sentence, I must be doing it right lately... Thanks for supporting innovators!

To everyone. Very nice read. Thank you!
I have nothing to add. Most of you said it all already.

Pretty much, "haters' gonna hate." and "hurt people... hurt people."
Thanks Derek. Really needed to hear *ahem* read this right now. So much negativity is rampant right now as everyone is considering themselves content creators. Art and artists are being cheapened by today's tech trends, but that's no excuse. Awesome post.

Nice one Derek.. This is the kind of attitude I built my infamous empire on :-) To be or not to be? I just choose to be.. I love the photo with the crab in the bottle neck the most, it says it all.. peace bro Tony

Thanks Derek, it's a great insight. There's much to be said about simply being happy, and simply being happy about who you are. Regards Robert

thx again Derek
In broader daylight,
You can follow a hunch an idea and then ppl say you are crazy.
But when it is a book you need a publisher.
When it is a research you need contextual academic support and so on.
So in the end you have to trust yourself and not give up.
Another "lesson" you posted already

Yep - get told all the time my plans to change the training world are naive and that I just have an expensive hobby. I don't do what I do for money - if I did I simply wouldn't be doing it (£20 earned so far for the last year is not a career changing amount). I believe in what I'm doing so much and that I've convinced over 30 people to share their training material content on line without any payment or promises - I've simply told them they'll be helping others. If you need or chase the money your objectives become less pure. I find not wanting or needing the money to be very liberating.

Every path in the life is original and particular.
There is no way similar each other.
The correct path is in trying to be WHAT YOU WANT TO BE: alone or in the crowd, shy or not, money lover or utopist....do you remember the (not subliminal too much) Jimmy Page's message on the famous cover?....
Compliments for the discussion and your thoghts
diana

Derek, I've known you since the beginning of CD Baby, and maybe you recall a few emails from me, always positive. I still have never seen such a simple yet effective artist website as the one you built. Too bad they have made it too heavy with tech stuff. Unnecessary.

But, you asked for comments on what you wrote here. As much as I could relate to it, and found it insightful and fun, I'd much rather you put your skills back into building something similar to CD Baby, but obviously, not the same thing. Something ahead of the pack and out of the frey. I'm very curios as to why you wrote this.

All the best always, I'm one of your biggest supporters.

Love the picture - and what an elegant way of commenting on our trash!

Yes, being prepared is important, but someone will always come out with something you're not prepared for and then the trick is to forgive yourself for not being ready....

Too true Derek, hope you are doing well, I guess you have the grey matter. don't think I have. I left home at 10.00am this am got back at 7.00pm. 9 hours! about 2.5 gigs!
Fixing a TV installation. Hard job, won't make much on it 60 miles round trip. Big V8 likes auto-gas 89 cents a litre, petrol is $1.75 a litre. She runs on both petrol and gas. Yanks call petrol "gas". Our gas is the stuff you burn in the kitchen stove.
Henrietta Ford was born in 1967. She has done over a million miles & could repeat that no trouble. She is made out of BHP Aussie steel. No plastic! Tupperware cars burn in a smash, you too.
Broke & happy mate.
Blessings Derek.

Very nice Derek !! I will share this !!

God Bless,

Arthur

And a Judge says

ORDER! in the court.

Just wanted to throw that out there.

Look everyone, Look at the word

ORDER!

What does it mean?

ORDER!

Stoics are into responsibility but not into fame, power, and prestige :)

Or maybe they're partially "right". Not because you need their validation, but because there's something you can't see on your own. You can choose pride and to feel "right", or take the constructive part of criticism to improve something , always sticking to your values. If you're not alone it's even for that reason. :)

We seem to live in a world where we make judgements based on our personal understanding and experience. In it self that may sound reasonable. Except most people know very little about a lot of things and know a lot about very few things. We don't seem to have the patients to research a subject before making an informed judgement.

Derek:

Thank you for your genuine altruism. (I know you're not seeking praise...)

I only wish that your thoughts could reach more millions!

Virtually my entire life of 86 years has revolved around music, thanks to my two extraordinarily talented and naturally musical parents.

It has comprised teaching, playing, songwriting and composing, storytelling and having a wonderful time making people happy with music!

It's entirely human to seek success (and recognition) but you have shared many profound thoughts for our consideration AND discussion.

May you enjoy many more productive years in which you may continue this effort!

Phil Klein

I think that this is an excellent observation and it reinforces my insistence on not worrying about the approval of others. Though Van Gogh was one of the most prolific artists of all time, his works are some of if not the most valuable in the world and his brother being an art dealer he only sold one painting in his lifetime. He also spent several years of his life in poverty. Despite this, he was self-actualized and did what he was put here to do; create art. As a very wise woman name Joyce Kennedy once told me, "Never justify your music". I think that advice is applicable into several areas of life. Finally, I suggest to always look at the source of the criticism; is the criticizer successful in the area that they are criticizing?

Brilliant!

It's that beautiful moment when the voices telling you you're wrong transform. They go from being the stuff that stops you and warns you off to the stuff that makes you realise you are making absolutely the right decision. Liberating and terrifying all at once.

SPOT ON DUDE! Thanks as always, sometimes I swear your talking directly to me (lol). Appreciate your efforts. Have a great day!

Hello Derek,

I fully agree! If someone does not agree with the way I do things "the person is free to make what he/she believes to be right. But please, leave me alone with such comments." :)

Thank you for this nice article!

Have a great week!
Desiree

Following the beat of a different drummer. My own drum. Good thoughts.

haha, that crab is using a bottleneck for a house!

I needed to hear this today.

I put my contradictions in all my social media bio's so people know (kinda) what to expect from the outset.

I'm a Proud Idahoan, a Messy Minimalist, a Skeptical Spiritualist, a Capitalistic Hippie and an Educated Dropout.

I am most inspired to continue to do music from a guy I met 20 years ago. He was a producer for some major record labels. I witnessed how he put songs together. The guy could not read music, had short fat chubby fingers (not dexterous at all) and he literally played one note at a time on keyboard to make recordings… but when he was done, you’d think Liberace had left the room. Seeing how passion can overcome limitations has stuck with me ‘til this day.

Couldn't have put it better,Derek,it takes all sorts and the more we accept people were they are the better you yourself will feel.

Actually, this also seems like a very worthwhile practice: periodically listing out one's preferences (as truthfully as possible, of course.)

Akin to defining success and failure for yourself

Yes. In fact, I turn the negative energy from those who do not believe in me into the fuel that gets me going to prove them wrong.

This year, I set out to record 300 songs, and I can't tell you how many people said I was a nut job. I've spent the last 8 years as a business coach, and all but ignoring my musical proclivities, so you can imagine how many more people said I was a bit wonked in the head for leaving coaching to pursue music... and a business-minded musician? Heavens! How many artists look at me as if I've already sold out.

But some of us were designed to make new molds, not fit into the old ones.

A person has to do what that person feels they should do. We are all unique - with unique gifts/skills, unique desires/dreams, unique ideas/visions, unique perspectives....

And we should never do what we do to prove anything to anyone or to win their approval. We should do what we do because WE FEEL IT deep inside. When I live life this way, I am most satisfied. It is a life of purpose and meaning and consciousness.

So true. I just had this crazy fight with hubby over contribution. I am a stay at home mom and singer/songwriters and part-time professional. He was feeling frustrated because he is the bread winner and was mad that I had all this free time. I chose a long time ago to be happy and do what I love and taking care of my kids and family, myself and music are what makes me happiest. Money does not make me happy but I am sure glad I have a supportive husband who makes money so I can do what I love. My contribution is loving my kids, being with them, being happy for the world and making music that makes folks happy.

Thanks for post I can go on and on but a great post indeed!
Kim

APTGJHG

Derek

Again, right on time. I was taking a beating from all sides. Standing with thousands, yet alone. Famous in other countries, unknown in my own. Every move is wrong, but my life/career is my responsibility, only to God do I owe an explanation

As always, great article Derek!

Perfect to get the brain-gear moving on a Monday morning!

Cheers from Cape Cod,

- Gary

Yes, yes & yes! Accept the criticism smiling, keep rocking & roll out your dream! Sometimes we just gotta let go of what the standard text book says is right/wrong to create something new & break out to make it happen! Love your inspiration :> thank you Derek!

Music is my business which by default automatically keeps me in front of crowds. But that doesn't change the fact that I enjoy solitude and grab for it at every chance. Most don't see that part of me simply because solitude permits no visitors. But now you know, and so do the critics.

Just in the nick of time. The right email at the right time! Thanks

This cannot ring any truer Derek. And, perfect timing for where I am at with my endeavor. My career touches all of your points about "breaking the mold" and I love receiving the criticism. When you are aware and prepared it typically is an opportunity, at the very least a challenge. Sometimes I wish their were more and often directly ask for them.

Thanks for all the confidence you have instilled to me with your words and emails. We are near ready to launch to the world!

Yes Derek thanks one more time for your post. Love this one because I have been one of those persons who want to please everyone. I was always insatisfied, not being myself and needing to be loved by the whole world.
After long years trying to change and searching serenity, I've learned a couple of things which are really important to me and I feel so much better. Today I can listen when people express their opinions but I don't need anymore to agree with them always or have the last word in a conversation.
Blessings. Patricia

Love the " The entrepreneur who’s not into money." part. There are many a soul who would pull you up for not building stuff which would make instant money!

My Way.
Understanding differences are a key to community success, and willing to listen equally to sharing ideas. Against the grain usually reaps larger rewards, but one must have thick enough skin to weather their critics.
Sometimes your critics are the ones who have all the chips in their kitty, and will use them to undermine and is credit your hard ethical work, just because they can, and are worries that you will change the game and eat into their pile.
Just remember its all just noise, which you must block out and let it rip, your way.
This is the moral to a story I am personally involved with, along with my wife, she wrote a book titled "Who The F$%# Is Linda Chorney?" inspired by her selection for a Grammy Nomination as the first total independent artist in a category previously reserved to major labled legends, Best Americana Album in 2012. It's a must read.
Use google and search " "Linda Chorney" you will be fascinated , and just might be inspired. Thanks Derek.

It really pisses me off that you have so much clarity at this point in your life! haha

These revelations usually only come, if ever, from age and many experiences. You have the experiences, therefore you are able to write and share the good stuff.

Gotta get you on my radio show- Can we figure out how to get that done! My audience of entrepreneurs would benefit so much!

Know thyself.

In a world where we're constantly being categorized (either by others or by ourselves), I'd like to think that there is no one else on earth exactly like you, or you, or you, or me – there never has been and there never will be. So feel free to shine on you crazy diamond! With apologies to Pink Floyd.

Who cares what others think! I witness people frozen by imaginary constraints everyday focusing their direction based on what others will think of them. You must have confidence in yourself that your logic and decision making are true!

As always, your comments are right on target -- and the photo is priceless! It isn't about what other people think, is it?
Thanks for the reminder and for gently nudging all those out there who aren't so sure. Your words are encouraging to so many quietly waiting to be validated.
enJOY...
Nanette

juxtaposition has always been my favourite word. :)

It's more fun and functional to be the misfit that is somehow able to influence a larger group of a different mindset.

The tendrils of existence that still connect us no matter how far apart we may seem to have become in superficial matters are always a beautiful discovery for me. What can I find between you and I that we share as part of this mad tapestry? ...

Thanks Derek, you bring up things at important times.

Derek & Aldo, so true . . My Mom explained to me as a youth, "No matter how positive you are, there are people out there that will immediately not like you, and everything that you do they will say its wrong, so don't worry about them, be yourself and be happy regardless!"
Thanks for sharing!

Derek
Right on. I agree but it takes a very long time to discover who you are and what you want to be. Then it takes courage to show up and stand firm. However, it is the only way - to embrace the truth of your life and share it with others. Personally, I never liked being in the "mold" and I am sure from reading this and your previous posts you do not like being in a "mold" either - thank goodness for you and for sharing you with us!

"Know your preferences well". Yes, something as seemingly simple is so complicated for some. Know who you are, "know your preferences well" and you stand in your Truth, your power to be who you really are.

Thank you Derek, love your posts.

It's also important to know what traits or habits you would like to change in yourself. Many people take a self-defeating stance and allow themselves to believe they have inherent traits, such as being a procrastinator or something along those lines. Don't defeat yourself.

The hermit crab with the pop bottle shell looks very proud : )

I love this picture! As always, great insight Derek!

For example, I just graduated from Berklee and some students from the class created a video that was supposed to represent the class as a whole. At one point an interviewer asked the students what they would do without music. Every student shown basically said they would be lost - That music was their only calling and their lives would crumble without it. These kids were all selling themselves short. Most of us are capable of far more than we allow ourselves to believe.

Thanks D, stopped by the BookBaby booth at the BEA and love the new project---great to see your new creative expression.

Abrazo.

Is it possible that being popular and successful may not align with "your stance" ?

Thanks Derek, great advice! 1

If my older self could go back and talk to my younger self, I'd tell him "you are right about everything."

If you're truly doing something different, whether horrible or genius, you'll get no end of resistance.

The leader who takes a stance, seemingly unpopular, who is the loneliest person in the world, until the masses catch on...

Thanks for the though provoking post Derek. Great way to start the day.

I believe that on a spiritual, (or quantum) level, it's about energy and the need to
control it. We feel an investment in our ideas and when we become attached to that, an energy of fear is manifested. The energy of fear, promotes the feeling of lack and a desire to control all energy. If you have built up some energy with your feelings and enthusiasm, people who fear, feel a lack of energy in their confidence and will try to decrease your energy, by criticising you. These people feel the need to be in control of energy, so they try to decrease the energy of others. Making someone else feel less about their aspirations, nocks out the competition of the energy that they do not control.

I think it is so
but I could be wrong
There are more ways than one
to write a song
More ways than one
to pronounce a word
so many ways
for a voice to be heard
;-)

Thank you for this encouraging post, Derek!

Interesting thoughts Derek
As I reflected on your comments I couldn't help but think This is about value and the perception of value
The conception of wrong is an abstract developed from the experience , learned bias and judgment of that person While there is substantial agreement on some "wrongs" the point I see being made here is that one must work from a self reasoned frame that recognizes that any thought or activity has a value to one's development and well being and those can be self determined or if willing, be allowed to be influenced by others If that person of influence is in a place in which one wants to be , it probably pays to listen , otherwise listen and think through it for ourselves

Great concept. I think if you are completely and totally into something, you don't care about any other opinion. It's simply not an option. You feel it! However, if your feelings aren't too strong about an idea, you would listen to people. Sometimes, when one person said you're wrong, you might be right, but if two people said you're wrong, you might be wrong. The only true indicator of right and wrong is your own feelings. If you feel confidant and excited about something, if it makes your soul sing of happiness, it's a right thing:)

Derek,
That's what makes the human race so interesting.
Some of us maintain projects in different industries
that allows us to be different and not take those hits.

I do television production & distribution to make money, manage & produce a musical group that gives me a lot of fun, and real estate development that allows me to express myelf, and still always give, regardless of the industry.
You will never please everybody, so don't try. Have fun.
J

I concur 100%. I used to he worried by what other people thought. As I got older and hopefully wiser, I came to realize no one can hold you back if you don't let them. Charge ahead no matter what.
Joe

Derek,

I love it. I live by this every day.

Great piece.

Hope all is well,
Keys

From my own experience, people who claim to not be into money usually have enough for themselves. People who don't have enough money for basic necessities tend to have a different view. It is most unfortunate we live in a society which bases achievement on wealth and fame, rather than on caring about each other. For example, if the minimum wage was 50,000 per year and, the maximum wage was 1 million per year, goods and services would actually cost less and, everybody in our society would have a chance for "life, liberty and the pursuit happiness", rather than the incredible inequality of wealth and opportunity seen today. There is no historical or other evidence to pretend that taxing the rich less will benefit either the poor or the working class or the middle class or even the rich themselves in the larger reality of things and, there is every reason to believe otherwise.

I'm saddled with classic professions, the journalist, novelist and entrepreneur. Add a little insanity. I don't suffer from any of them. I enjoy every minute.

Listening to criticism -- even when it is wrong or misguided, is worth the effort. You never know when you will learn something valuable. It's part of being a student of life.

Dichotomy. That's me. I look like an overweight frumpy 50 something woman and yet I am a very good trainer, certified in many disciplines and swim 40 to 50 lengths 3 times a week along with being a belly dancer and teaching classes of some sort every day. I am gregarious at work with my hands and mind on many people every day. I like to socialize with a few friends upon occasion. My private life, I AM VERY PRIVATE. I think there needs to exist a complete separateness for some of us. Its how we regenerate. Hence the dichotomy. I LOOK like a dichotomy and I am not sure why but I do. Think it must be a mind thing! What I am projecting because of self beliefs. Its been a very confusing time and I am injured and I know that some of the emotional spiritual things I am working on are part of this physical injury coming to bear and that's a good thing in a way because it tells me I am on the right track and I really NEEDED to read your article because it reinforces what I am already learning . . . I am right where I am supposed to be! THANKS.

This is poetry, Derek. Beautiful!

articulate and very well said. Thanx for sending it.

Gorgeously written thanks, Derek! :)

This is an interesting post for sure. When I began studying to be an artist I studied in the old style...the rigorous classical way. I had no idea that by doing that I would offend the sensibility of modern artists. I can't tell you how often I get hate mail (or just comments online) from a modern artist who is offended that I am approaching things the classical way. I always tell them that they can make whatever they want, but I am going to study the craft of drawing/painting. By learning to become a competent painter I am now no longer an "artist" in their eyes...I'm just a "craftsman". It really is interesting that you will always offend someone no matter what path you take...or at least someone will always have something to say haha.

Great food for thought - you didn't mention my field but I'm the 'laid back' insurance agent. Probably lost a lot of money but have helped a lot of people, living a good life and did it my way, treating every one as if I was their brother. Keep up the great work!

Derek you could not me more right.
I live in a little city in México where everything you do that is not in their thinking, they say you are crazy.

I almost said, "What if people aren't telling you you're wrong?" because that stuff is just like water off a duck's back for the most part. In retrospect of today's work I realized that although someone was definitely responding negatively toward my work I was consciously not responding in like fashion. In fact I have heard plenty of criticisms and I guess it is really ongoing. If it's something useful to my highest values,or development of my character, fine, I can consider that. If it doesn't fit, it falls by the wayside. "Take what you need and leave the rest." The rest isn't worth wasting time on.

This is a great point. Along those lines, it's also really important to factor this in when deciding how to filter advice you get. Keeping your chin up when folks disapprove is one thing, but if you are actively getting guidance from people whose priorities and values are opposed to yours, that needs to be vetted very carefully, lest you take the advice and use it to inadvertently move closer to a goal that isn't your own.

Very true, Derek! Well said!!

Thanks for great post!

I'm a software engineer. I love my code and I want to keep it clean, and I want to do coding for entire of my life, but some people said to me if you are do coding, you still be an employee, and stop writing code and do project management instead. Entrepreneur is a big name than a programmer.

What I like for myself is even I become an entrepreneur, I still like coding.

Derek, clearly you've been following me around because you just used my career-crisis situation to write your latest article. As a luxury car salesperson who makes a decent paycheck, my older bosses can't for the life of them understand why I would want to take off more than 3 days a month or leave the office early on a Saturday after working 13 straight days. So, I'm dismissed as a lazy, ungrateful, millennial when in reality I'm just someone who values personal time and flexibility more than money. Waiting tables at a trendy restaurant only 5 times a week like in college and exploring my natural curiosities sounds like heaven right now. Then, I think of the backlash I'll receive saying 'I'm wrong'..... Anyways, great read.

Derek: A thoughtful and lovely piece for a Monday. You are so much more a guru than others who call themselves such. Thank you! Hope all is well. Safe travels. Best/Geri R

Thanks for this Derek ...
personally, I gave up on worrying about what others think about my actions, oh some 24 years ago. However, my biggest challenge is keeping my mouth shut about what they are doing! LOL!

Great article. It reminds how we should like who we are first and not worry about what others think!

I like this. The part about "The artist into discipline" reflects my own attitude. I've always wanted to be a serious artist, not to waste it away living an 'artistic' life. I chose this course early on. My role model was the writer Thomas Mann, whose lifestyle was to get up early in the morning every day and write. Mann had an extreme level of discipline, and I took pride in following in his footsteps. Over the years, I've heard a lot of criticism about my lifestyle not being 'bohemian' enough, but when I hear it I know better. I think of Thomas Mann, know they are mistaken, and go on with what I'm doing.

I can relate so well. As a musician and an artist, I've always wondered why I continue doing what I do. I play guitar and sing but hover near panic at being in front of people. Nobody seems to notice which means I fake it well enough. I love my obsessive realistic pen and pencil art but I'm terrible at selling it. I'd be thrilled to stay in my studio and create while they sold themselves. Thus I understand the " starving artist" title but won't ever stop playing and creating. Maybe ill figure it out someday :)

"Old Grumble"

Many years ago my Dad had a lot of people working for him. They were loggers, truckers, sawmill workers, farmers, woodsmen, construction workers. In those days, it seemed as though everyone had a nickname. One of those people had the nickname "Old Grumble." It seemed no matter what the situation he would find something wrong, and would grumble about it, even when the Sun was shining on a perfect day. Some people just are not happy not matter what. Choose to be happy! It's better for everything!!

You're right, Derek. Here's my variation: When I first began painting, and later when I began making film, I was humbled by the quality. It would have been much easier to have been given a smaller gift. I don't have an enflamed ego, so I had to look at it in the third person in order to accept that it was world class. Collectors on other continents own my work, my neighbours don't get it. After three decades of living with that lonely disconnect I realize that I'm not 'wrong'.

Derek-

for us, it's not about the fame, it's not about chasing Facebook likes...

instead, it's about the quality of our music & engaging the souls of our listeners and live audiences.

our philosophy and focus keep us sane, happy, creative, energized -- and separated from the noise.

with gratitude,
LxoJ

Some folks just live against the grain of normal stereo-types. I do think that knowing what your own normality is verses what others expect when they find out your vocation sets you at an advantage. Derek, I do find your insightful outlooks stimulating. They are like steroids for the intellect.

TIM Baker

There's always going to be those naysayers Derek... You're soooo right brother man! Hope and pray that all is well with you and the Mrs.! By the way, how's the progress with that next great vision of yours coming along, aka Muckwork?!. You've got that right man, as a man who's been blessed and/or cursed with an entreprenerial spirit, I'm not quite sure as to which one that is yet, because I've never had the opportunity to make any money that could be enough to consider living comfortably for the rest of my life, yet... anyway, but I do think that I was blessed with recently meeting my true soul mate... More will surely be revealed on that subject over time! Take care, God bless you & your loved ones Derek and keep up the great work inspiring and motivating us!

Sincerely,
Grateful Ed Moore aka MrNDVERSE
Stormy Monday Art Personal Asst.:-0~

Perfect blog post for today's entrepreneur. You put words to things I've been uncomfortable about. I have been wrestling with the anomalies of being true to who I am. Your words are liberating and give me permission to be more authentic and transparent. I just love that you've said this out loud and succinctly.

Thank you for your brilliant observations!

Good advice. Simple, and not complete.. but good as far as it goes.

There's not a tendency or emotion listed here that I've not felt myself and saw in others despite what they say or think.

Realizing one's self is a certain way and not allowing others to tell you that you "should" be another way is great.

Accepting and embracing a different "type" can be a wonderful growth experience.. whether that's popular with those who "should" on you or not.

I have been doing music since 1965. I was 16 years old when I started writing music. I was signed by a publishing company and record label that same year for five years.I did demos of my songs for other artist and put out some singles during that time but not hits and not a lot of money ,but met people like Del Shannon, Boyce and ,and Hart.In 1970 started my own group called cyrus round. We recorded our own music,but no record companys were interested in us cause our sound wasn't what they were looking for.I did a side project for a band called the Mike Harrison band. I wrote music for them but happen with them. By 1980 the band broke up I went to college and got married but never gave up on the writing. Became a social worker. Now I must tell you I was in music because I loved it,not because of the money.I 2000 I went back into music because of Bob Welch and his friendship. He thought it was time for me to go back into music since my kids were grown,and so I did. I reformed my group and we took all our music and put out three cds.We our now working on our fourth. Have we made any money ,no! We our on facebook and their are people that like us and you can get our music on our own site,but I just don't know how to promote my stuff anymore.

I like it. I think that everyone should focus on their lives instead of wasting time judging their neighbor. Our true and only guide if above us and invisible.

Actually just recorded a podcast about this very thing.

This is why the foundation of who you are and what you're doing is so important. No matter what it is, even something charitable like giving food to hungry people, somebody is going to have a different stance and criticize.

A friend of mine told me, "You can't get it right and you can't fuck it up." I think this applies to anything you do as well as anything you do in the eyes of other people.

With all this said, I think criticism can be helpful. Sometimes we're too close and attached to something to see it for what it really is. But if you've got that foundation and you've run things up the flag pole and had success (whatever that is) doing it, don't let the opinions of others stop you. We're never all going to agree on everything.
Hi David! Yeah good point. I forgot to distinguish between “you're doing it wrong” as a matter of preferences and “you're doing it wrong” as in “for what you're trying to do, you're doing it wrong” — Derek

Be happy doing what you are doing and you will always have enough.

This one is just so powerful and introspective. Thanks Derek!

Totally agree. Thanks again for including me among those whom you sharing your life! Just sent you an email with a little tidbit regarding this very subject.

Re: #4. And sometimes the compliments are unspoken/unexpressed or the mere absence of critique.

Agree. I'm a musician with a band and it seems I'm constantly replacing band members. One of the problems is it seems most musicians don't want to put in the time and effort to succeed. They are so locked into their jobs, families, life style they can't do it. I try to tell them that if you want to be great you have to take some chances and go for it. It kind of surprises me how many people just accept the so called normal life style and don't have a sense of adventure. They don't have the courage, passion or imagination that is needed.

So you can be right and wrong at the same time. Depending on perspective. After you have evaluated the perspectives (two sides to every story), be mindful of the consequences. There a times when going against your own grain is a greater gift to others than a loss to you.

Derek, I appreciate your perspective. Victor Frankl said, "Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom." If we can recognize the space after someone tells us we are wrong for the opportunity that it is, then we can freely choose it as a sign of our growth into our personal definition of success. With gratitude, Sim

I'm currently reinventing myself & getting slammed down so hard by those who should support me the most, it's difficult to move forward. And as you know there are many in the wings just WAITING for you to fail so they can gloat. There is practical wisdom in experience, & reinventing the wheel is not the smartest move for a long term success. There have been many bigger & flashier songwriting orgs that have come up since I took over SongNet. They burned bright & burned out fast. We're still here. Yet with an established org, I still have people that want it to fail. I have no idea why other than to maybe feed their own satisfaction that nobody & no org is above failure.
I recently went to my favorite Mexican restaurant, a truly iconic place in East L.A. that has been lauded over & over but only recently has expanded to include another location after close to 50 years in the neighborhood. The owner was beloved & passed away recently. The heirs said it would remain the same. Nope. In one short month, it's changed. prices are up, flavors are more generic, & the business model is changing. I really hope they do well, but they will no longer see me waiting in line.
Sure, "if it ain't broke..." is a safe way to do business, but no progress is made. Starting CD Baby was a bold move, & having the life you have now even bolder. I applaud that. But I find it difficult to consider following that because of the same criticism you suffered & difficulties you met with along the way. I know your journey is not wrong for you, but I don't think it is right for me. Maybe that restaurant is making some right decisions, but they are the wrong choices for those who preferred the original flavors, and their customer base will prove some of that. Maybe they will have new customers to replace their old "fanbase", & that is the risk they are taking. But sometimes wrong is just...wrong.
Like trout flavored ice cream...
Hi Jimi! Long time no speak. Thanks for the great example and comparison. — Derek

Derek - So true, and thanks for the "reverse encouragement." IMO, this pattern starts when one is very young. And it can take the better part of a lifetime to get entirely comfortable with creating like a salmon swimming upstream.

As one who "presumes" to craft original songs, I encounter these pressures with some frequency, and have for decades. One of the most encouraging things I heard about this was from an experienced backup singer in a Nashville studio (Doug Clements, who sang on my "River of Grace" project): "...Every songwriter lays out their work before a world that says, 'How dare you?!' "

I often hearken back to that, and it helps.

WoW... I love this post... Thank you!

Beautiful articulation of self-knowledge. Also a great example of the benefit of defining your personal brand proactively. I can imagine that without the self knowledge, one might be diverted down an inauthentic and ineffective path by the force of misunderstood critique. Much appreciated Derek- great way to start the week!

So true...I'm an artist and a disciplined flake. :)

that was very good. thank you Derek

Derek, your insight is beyond words...You're like a therapist, but with out the copay ;-)

I really love this Derek very nice thanks for this!

So true. I had paralyzing stage fright all of my life, starting with my first piano recital at age 5. I quit music at age 16. It was too painful...a love/hate relationship. When I was middle aged, a mother with kids in school, I got a piano and started playing, singing, and writing songs again, timidly at first. With the encouragement of my husband I kept at it. And then, with the revolution of the internet and digital home recording, I was freed to be a musician, in public cyberspace, without ever having to perform live in front of an audience again. No more stage fright! My family doesn't even hear me play live. I built a detached music studio behind my house. I create and record in solitude and throw some of it out on the internet. I'm not attached to any outcome either, except to respect myself as an artist. If others listen, great! If not, that's great too.

There are those who say things that are tantamount to "you're wrong". Just because someone has a grander vision, he is often dismissed as impractical, unrealistic. It is seen as one big bite and not as several small ones. A problem with no solution, not even an implied one. An obstacle, which is a source of frustration to be avoided and not a challenge to be taken. Too bad. It takes many hands and many skills to raise a barn and to feed those that are building it.

I want to savor this, frame it, and hang it in my living room. Thank You Derek.

Narrowcasting and consistently delivering the expectations for the smallest of niches seems to be the better path today. But, I think we get bored with ourselves and the people who idolize us.

The musician who avoids crowds.
That's me.
I like the world of writing music and hearing it.
It is a world without people, just emotion, thought and feeling. It is a nice world.
Way better than standing in line at a restaurant or event for hours to watch somebody do something.
But like you said, that is not for everybody.
That's cool.

Great help as I was having one of those days, No matter what I seemed to be doing it was counterproductive to the whole. Knew in my heart it was the right thing with less than positive reinforcement from the from the sidelines.

Hi Derek,
Good to hear from you.
Frankly, i have never been one to follow the crowd. I just do my own thing and to hell with people's opinion. If it feels good do it. If one gets it wrong hopefully, we'll learn from our own mistakes and no one else is to blame. If one's paying for advice then it's an entirely different matter. Thank you for the mind games you test us with.
Take care buddy.

Know what might be even cooler, Derek? Neither wanting nor needing a million dollars, and, best of all, not caring about it.

i must be doing it ALL right....
hehehe...
i have gotten ALOT of flak by being DIY person long before that was a 3 letter accronym ... you know becuase if i just hold out or wait...( THOSE words are not in my vocabulary) some big man will come and make all your "dreams" come true.. becuase YOU surely can't..
*Oh yes i can !because MY dream was to Do.. IT... myself..

As always, Derek, you hit the nail on the nose. I think the embracing of your own quirks is what makes someone so endearing. Let go of the mold and be yourself. Some will love you, some will hate you. Hold the mold and you live in mediocrity affecting others only minimally.
I always love your insights.

Thanks again

if life is like the story of the tortoise and the hare(only nobody knows the outcome...people bet on the hare because of what they see and hear of the heare...
it would be the "popular" choice...
i prefer to not do what is popular........
but then my idea of winning is not crossing the finish line first but having enough breath left to enjoy the fact i finished.......

Good thoughts.

"Do what you feel in your heart to be right - for you'll be criticized anyway. You'll be damned if you do, & damned if you don't." - Eleanor Roosevelt

Thanks & keep up the good work.

Hi Derek, this is one of my favorite of your posts yet. This speaks so much to me, and I'm sure to your many readers. Thank you.

Derek thanks so much for writing this for me. I launched a blog and it was going so well. last week i buckled cause I was getting some backlash, but like u said..thats just a sign that whatever I was doing is working. I think I can move forward now!

Wonderful! Thanks for a great reminder.

Great point. Our culture seems largely mold driven. There are unstated expectations for what a banker, a chef, a songwriter, an accountant, etc. should look/talk/feel like. Truth is, a lot of folks, well suited to a calling, can get shut out--and shut themselves out--because they don't fit the mold. This "mold problem" is good to acknowledge, and ignore for the most part.

Paraphrasing the best career advice I ever heard--and it's an exercise to remember and be true to this-- "Just focus on doing what makes you come alive, because what the world needs is more people who come alive." (Howard Thurman)

This is great! (from a musician who avoids crowds)

Derek - Great article, It's comforting to know I've been right all along. When my son saw the photo he said " it must be a King crab, for he is wearing a crown" I'm sure that the crab is so proud of his new shell that he doesn't realize all of his parts are showing:) Note: a much better picture then the demented clown from a week or so ago.

I am the musician who avoids crowds. Always afraid that someone will tell me I suck, or I'm not playing the right way. Yet I spend hours learning every DAW that has come out. Hours recording songs that I've written and never really intending them to be released to anybody. Hours looking up how to play different types of music on the Internet so that I can get better but yet never seem to want to show off any of those new talents. I guess some people will tell me I'm wrong for having those attitudes, but at least I'm happy doing what I'm doing.

Even when you ARE wrong, if you're doing the walk, then that's a sign you are doing something right. Those who would say you are wrong are doing the talking. I would rather be doing the walk than spouting the talk. Let em spout! Sometimes you have to be wrong before you can be right. It's just part of the journey: your own unique journey. Thanks for the perspective Derek. It's the hurtful words I have had to learn to let roll off my back. And, along the journey, it's okay to be wrong occasionally. My two cents is that it's also okay to remind yourself when you know you are right. If I waited for kudos on everything I did right, well -- that would just be wrong.

Great post. Thanks again Derek.

"More important than YOUR dreams for me are MY dreams for myself!"
I understand it like this quote. :)
Great article!
Cool picture!
:D

Very provocative, insightful, and well laid out. My only reservation is the deduction that "every time they say you're wrong - that's a sign you're doing it right." Because you're being who you want to be? In what way is that other than trivially true?

As usual Derek you are right on the money. So insightful and exact... This is why you remain my guru!
Thanks for sharing your thoughts. They are always welcomed and greatly appreciated!

Cheers,
Dorie Pride

Gotta believe in yourself and what you are passionate about. Everyone doubts themselves now and then, but you have keep on swinging and improving. You'll never have everyone like/believe, ect. You are an original. Not all will understand your dance!

Great accomplishment seems imperfect,
Yet it does not outlive its usefulness.
Great fullness seems empty,
Yet it cannot be exhausted.

Great straightness seems twisted.
Great intelligence seems stupid.
Great eloquence seems awkward.

- Lao Tzu

Great article! straight to the point. People seem to admire a person who goes after what he wants. What girl wants to be pursued by a man because he's trying to do the right thing? I agree...know what you want! Then you will actually have a self to improve. Thank you Derek.

Thanks Derek I really enjoyed the article it makes alot of sense. I think the most important thing is that you are true to your self and don't care what people think.

All the best,
Hadassah

Dear Derek,

Sarah Palin is an honest conservative who has never been afraid to speak her mind, and she is hated by both parties on the left and right. I admire her for the reasons you've listed above. She knew ahead of time she would be hated for not thinking that big government is the answer, or socialism is the answer. There will always be those who will think we are wrong, and that's okay, because we have freedom of speech and thoughts still which is priceless. The freedom to be oneself is one of the best gifts one can have in my humble view. What do you think, Derek about what I've written here, man? Thank you for sharing your thoughts. Mostly I agree with you. Kindly, Clay Wilson from Sony's Acid Planet

Derek -
Once again, a wonderful post. You're so good at putting concepts that we all need to hear into clear language. Thanks for sharing!
Bob Wilson

Since I was very young I seemed to be the only one who understood my dreams and goals. I knew it was totally up to me and discipline was my only brother. Once I would arrive people would always say "How did you do that?" When I start to tell them they rarely want to hear the whole story as the details usually looses their interest.

So, from the beginning, I do things for myself because I want to feel what it's like for me to experience this. (You die alone) All the stereotypes go out the window w/me. For myself and anybody I support it's all about heart. Staying focused and listening to good or bad feedback, picking out what you can use for growth and move on toward your goal or what you want out of your life is the way I live.

"Then every time they say you’re wrong, that’s a sign you’re doing it right"

This quote is exactly the attitude I've had from day one and it hasn't let me down yet.

Thanks, Derek, I always appreciate your insights and humor.

Derek, Hi. In response to your "Some will always say you're wrong", I wish to share the following. Thanks for making me think.

Some will always say you're wrong,
some will never doubt you.
Some will want to prove they're right,
and nearly unbelievably oust you.

Some, like you, agree it's true,
that some will never see,
the way things are,
the way you see,
just how obvious can some mind's be?

Nan Goodard 2013-06-03

I liked this one and the picture: "If you’re not into crowds, many people will say you’re missing out."

Right on, Derek! I've been going down the wrong path for years, and it gets sweeter each year!

Derek,

Fantastic, I will pass it on.

Keep up the good work I am sure it is making a difference in many lives and the world will become a better place in which to live.

I've been an introvert all my life, and a musician nearly as long. It's always been a battle, my heart and soul demanding I do something normally extroverted. Sometimes I've been told I'm wrong, but I also accept this is who I am, as much as having blue eyes, and being an introverted musician is the only way I can do it.

Amen, Derek, and thank you!

Beautiful.

So glad you're on the planet, Derek.

Right on, Derek! This one totally speaks to me!
A couple of days ago my band played at a festival in Upstate, NY. Right after our show, this guy approached me and said: "Man, you sound awesome, but you don't have hits! You gotta' have hits if you want to make it happen! And yeah, your sound is very advanced and all, but there are no hits!" I didn't know how to respond, so I just disregarded it. Now I would "bash on with a smile, being who I want to be" ;). 'Cause I ever wanted to "make hits", this stage has long passed. Now I just want to make music that speaks to me, and I can only hope that it finds someone out there who feels the way I do. Same way this post of yours found me. Thank you, Derek!

I found that quite profound! I think that you're an outstanding individual, and have always enjoyed reading your writings..

You once again have put your finger on and articulated that which is the essence of this business. The tools one needs to succeed and the tenacious drive that is so critical to success are always the same time and time again.

It is what we each chose to do when we ring that bell, fulfill that dream and go home after the crowds are gone that make us all so individualistic and so very special.

No rules need to followed upon reaching success but to make a personal decision on how you feel you want to handle it and how you live your life.

I think this lesson should be called being comfortable in one's own skin do you know Derek?

You are one remarkable and caring man who gives back all you have ever received and makes those who know you understand why they keep coming back for more!

John Luongo

Hi Derek.....
I can honestly say that at this point in my late youth.....hahaha.......I don't really care what people think..... in regard to whether they think I am "right or wrong" in their eyes.....that usually changes frequently anyway....hugs and fishes to you and those you love.... :)

Good to hear from you hope you are safe and healthy.

Lots to be thankful this summer, not the least of which is the opening of my recording studio and the first project -- a band called "Out of Alice" from Denmark, Australia. Over forty songs recorded, and now picking and choosing and mixing.
Busy production season at SNL etc. Here are some highlights:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m2pK60VlnJ8
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J6_GSwTi_nY

the things I do for money....Drop in for lunch! Best, John

I love the quote:
"Then every time they say you’re wrong, that’s a sign you’re doing it right."

That's enlightening.

Thanks for sharing :)

Thanks Derek,

I shared your new article on one of my 4 facebook pages.

Thanks and best regards

AUDIO-RARITIES
Jan

You can't please everyone, Derek.

This reminded of the famous Juha fable:

One day Juha was riding his donkey and his son was
following him on foot. A group of people passed by.
“Look at that man,” they commented, “riding
and letting his son walk. Doesn’t he have any pity?”
So, Juha dismounted and let his son ride the
donkey, while he walked along behind. Another
group of people passed by.
“Look at that lad,” they commented, “riding the
donkey while his father walks. Doesn’t he have any
manners?” So, Juha mounted the donkey together
with his son, and they went on their way. They
passed by a third group of people.
“Look at that heartless man,” they commented,
“riding the donkey along with his son. Doesn’t he
have any pity for the beast?”
So, Juha and his son both dismounted and
walked, driving the donkey on ahead of them. They
passed yet another group of people.
“Look at those two imbeciles,” they said, “tiring
themselves out walking, and there’s the donkey in
front of them without any load.”
So, Juha and his son carried the donkey between
them, and walked along like this. They passed still
another group of people.
“Look at these two madmen,” they said, “carrying
the donkey instead of letting the donkey carry them.”
At that the two of them let the donkey fall.
“Let me tell you something, son,” Juha said.
“You can never please everyone!”

Be different. Different is good. And it's dissipative to apologize for being yourself. Fly your flag, while also knowing that not everyone is coming with you. And good thing!

Daniel Mezick
https://twitter.com/DanMezick

Love it !

To your picture, a phrase in Cayman is "crabs in a bucket".

Let others be the crabs in the bucket, you can set your own path.

As for me, I'm that entrepreneur who is not into money. I am leading Shirlaws in Cayman for what we call cultural reasons, I'm purpose driven.

Of course being an entrepreneur with leadership and management background, I'm also focussed on ensuring our business is successful (both organisationally and financially), as the more we do this, the more we can focus on making a difference.

Tough to make a difference if you don't stay in business.

If people don't bother or hurt each other then whatever they do is right based on the informations and values that they have absorbed through their life. That is why everyone is different and reacts differently to what they see and face . Regards karim

Thank you for sharing. This experience is new to me. I have never been keen to give in to peer pressure, but boy this group I'm in now sure can push. It's a great learning experience, to be aware of what is happening and being able to stand ground despite public opinion. Its important to know what you want and to be ready to pay for it.

hallo Derek, been eons since we connected. but always read what you send. this is my favourite. love it. clear. concise. honest. to the point. and hit home. have always been told i'm wrong in how I live, have lived. and while I've made some mistakes, it's been good...loneliness, isolation, joy, laughter, love...all mixed up in the magnificent pot of life. wherever you are be well and be happy. i'm sure you are. blessings. a

......and but for love ..all these wonderful things would loose their charm. :-)

Thank you for this. Wisdom and trust well packaged!

Hi Derek,

I felt like this little crab with the broken soda bottle helmet for most of my life. The helmet is funcional and clever but everyone told me I was acting like a fool. I carried on, not because the criticism didn't bother me, but because I don't know any other way to be. On occasion the criticism slowed me down or made me second guess my artistic path. The difference now is I've learned to not let the criticism distract me from my visions, or to be honest, not as much as when I was younger. What a wonderful photograph and metafor. Cudos to the photographer.

Thank you Derek! Good thoughts.

When you have 'inner wealth' then this is easy. Without it, it's impossible...

Derek, you are exactly right my friend and a great blog! Usually the people criticizing can't make the actual art and are very quick to judge, so negative comments are easily brushed off! I love this blog and thanks for sharing Derek! People along the way told me I would never be in movies without a expensive agent or pro acting experience, etc. and this weekend I have a scene with Jewel amazingly, airing on Lifetime Movie Network in the film Ring of Fire on Sunday June 9th. It pays to avoid the negative comments from others who are scared to try for themselves.

When you make an unconventional choice resistance is automatic, but the right or wrong of it is completely subjective.

i just love your offerings!
keep them coming please...

stephen

Great post! And something that goes with this is that it's ok for what you want to change over time. Because along with the people who think you are foolish for not fitting into what you "should" be, are also the ones who support what you want...until you change your mind or want to try a different direction.
Thanks for the ongoing thought provoking posts, Derek!

Heeeeyyy, where's my post from the other day? I guess I'm gonna go eat worms O_O .
Maybe it's this one? — Derek

It's what makes life interesting...someone elses journey may influence us to make adjustments on our way.thanks Derek

You hit the nail on the head Derek. I'm a musician who is organized and detailed. Not sure what that means! Thanks.

Wellll...left my comments on the link to "preferences". I have emailed this to several, and made photocopies for a few very very dear people who need to read/hear this from someone else right now.

I needed to read it, too. Thanks, Derek.

Hi Derek!
I have always wanted to be right but to many, I am doing the wrong things. Thanks for this, I am encouraged to keep doing the things that I love doing even if they seem wrong to many.

Goals and ambitions have changed for me through the years. Giving back whether through musical skills and the passion the artist displays, or the day jo skills acquired
through the pursuit of music, is important for the artist' s spirit ual growth and life satisfaction in later years. We are stewards of money, guitars and songs. If these things
are administered with good intentions then there is satisfaction and peace in the heart. I call this retirement.

Mr.D,enjoyed your short commentary,and the perfect photo of the hip crab taking life as it comes,with the perfect shades!!!!Want to foward some music to you that has been sent to me as well as stuff that u may enjoy.Live here in northern calif,am a jazz drummer,and i am sure we both have friends in common.....stay well and let me know if i can send via email great musical selections.....

Very true, Derek!!!
I even made a music video kind of about that :)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qlrqo033YZg

:)
Wow! Great song and great video. Thanks for posting it, Marina! — Derek

They say Van Gogh was crazy (mentally ill) in every biography you read about him. Was he? Or, just holding on to his destiny...
..."But we're never gonna survive unless we get a little crazy" - Seal

Right on the mark! I agree

Very thought-provoking ~ thank you Derek. I've spent most of my life missing out on things because people told me it wasn't right for me, I couldn't do something like that; or didn't have enough education, etc. Now at 55 y/o, I find myself in a decent job, but going nowhere with it. On the other hand, I have so many creative ideas in my head and feel more confident than ever before of my potential.....I just have to find the time in-between life's demands to make them more concrete.....

Some people will base their opinion of you solely on how they actually feel about themselves.... :)

Well done. Indeed in life everybody with different mindset.

D: I look forward to reading your posts, and this was timely. You are a gem! I keep reminding myself that praise and criticism are both the same. Also, thanks for posting Alex Marttunen's photo. Its priceless.

Keep it up

We are all different - unique - individualizations of the infinite; we are all both personal and universal. Thus, however we may appear to others, on the INSIDE we are all ONE at the source.

This knowledge gives us comfort in the face of failure or difficult challenges or even the (sometimes VERY) bad surface behavior of others in our world, because wherever and however we may go - wherever and whenever we are - and whatever road or decisions we take, we will all arrive in the ONENESS that IS the ongoing infinite cause.

Completely agree.

It has taken me a long time to understand what motivates me.

I would print out photos of Aston Martins for motivation to realise it actually did very little.

I'd get a "thank you" comment from a reader and realise how much more that meant.

Great! Then I will continue to avoid joining Twitter!

I love to read your work Derek, it always either makes me smile or strikes a chord that makes me think and most times both. Thinking is a good thing. Keep on doing what you're doing, it really helps.

thanks bro,
Steve.

Usually the molds of life people design for themselves is influenced by enviornment, genetics, the family values or lack thereof, and the sensitivity of peer pressure. All these things create a mind set that leaves people to believe that's who they really are and it can't be changed. Maybe they hve nodesire to change from that which may be an inferior life style or character. Some may feel trapped, others comfortable with who they are and where they are. But knowing we're at the top of the mountain and everything is downhill is the greatest inspiration of life. Listen to the Lord. Read your Bible. You are more than flesh and blood with all it's physical and mental handicaps.

I like this article a lot. I think about this type of stuff often, especially in the context of the way the music industry is kind of forcing up-and-coming artists to be more "business men and women" (worrying about marketing, investments and profits) instead of them just being "artists" (worrying about creativity and ingenuity).
Although I feel it is necessary for an artist to be business savvy, I believe there still needs to be room for an artist just to worry about the art. I know my preferences, and I am the type that would love to just focus on the art and let some business person focus on the business and then we can colaborate together to make it all work. Today's music business model calls for the artist to wear the hat of the CEO, the promoter, the producer, the publisher, the performer and so on.
Nowadays, it seems like if you are not fitting a particular mold (or stereotype) then some people will tell you that you are wrong. This is why it is so important to know your preferences and be true to yourself.
This is a great article; keep up the good work!

-E

It's a Garden Party out there.

Wow, your blog has 'us' in a nutshell..No one ever likes anything more the five minutes so we better just please ourselves and 'god' whatever god is to each us..huh. Guess life is like a shot ya get from doctor..hurts but is necessary to getting well....think about explorers..people hated them..still do..and yet they found new countries for us to live in!!! So like it or not..evolution pushes us onward and upward..we go griping mostly I guess, but go we do..luv ya blogs..they keep me 'awake'...joy

I guess I'm one of those who break the mold. The world class singer-entreprenuer with the MBA (who placed service and love of music before money) who is highly structured and preferred singing with one student than before the crowd.

...bottom line; know and be loyal to yourself. This also takes practice, no?

Toronto 5.o5.2o13

Hi Derek,

"
Haply I think on thee, and then my state,
Like to the lark at break of day arising
From sullen earth, sings hymns at heaven's gate;"
Yours.
Miriam Sielicka

I absolutely LOVE that photograph! A hermit crab recycler of trash....priceless!

Love this. It is so true. If we have clarity of who we are and what we are accomplishing, it allows us to stand tall in the face of criticism. The challenge for most of us is to have that clarity. Thanks for this post, I plan on sharing it today with my followers at http://facebook.com/dave.mcghee1

It wouldn't be called innovation of everyone did it:) Great post Derek!

You are right again my friend. I never have needed anyone else's idea of perfection but mine, and even that is in a constant state of progress. I create in silence in a 5 x 8 room. Some scoff, some have laughed at me, but my peace is only understood by me and that is just fine!

Individuality makes us who we are and the world a great place to live!

I could not agree with you more...and this brings to mind a few quotations....

“To realize that all people are alike and all are different is the beginning of wisdom.”
--Jeffrey Fry

“Art is not in the eye of the beholder. It's in the soul of the artist.”
--Seth Godin

“If a man does not keep pace with his companions, perhaps it is because he hears a different drummer. Let him step to the music he hears, however measured or far away.”
--Henry David Thoreau

This needs to be a children`s book. The sooner you figure this out, the happier you will be.

I recently closed a restaurant. At the annual company get together I wanted to own up to it and apologize for a bad investment that affected everyone. (Longer hours for the managers, etc.)

I told them (in Japanese): "I`m sorry for my bad investment and all the stress I put you through. But if I had to do it all over again, I would probably do it the same way. Because that is who I am. The reason for the success of this company, is the same reason for the failure of this latest restaurant."

I am a gambler. I gamble on my ability to swim after I jump into the ocean. My process is a little too aggressive, and sometimes not very well researched or planned. But thats who I am.

yeah, right on,

Basically. . . We're wrong to be right and right to be wrong. Finally, I can get on with it. . . whatever "it" is. . .

If they say you are wrong
Just write them a song
Let them hear it their way
Then go on with your day

awesome! keep your head up and ignore the noise keep on derek!

What you think of me is none of my business!

Well said ! I agree. The other dynamic that I see is the "one upmanship" comments for just about anything. ex. I drove 150 miles.....no I drove 250........etc etc

Thanknyou for this reassuring post. Sure does make you define yourself and stand proud....
http://youtu.be/_vJRufLWaMI


Follow your arrow wherever it points!

My Dear Mr. Sivers:

Warriors do not spend time expecting people to understand, or accept the truth as it is written from a supposedly common belief. As I have written in the past some strange, but true stories that have changed the world, I am not ashamed to be alive.
There are many people that have more knowledge of certain subject matters than I, but they are dedicated to seeing generations of people killed, maimed, and destroyed, and after they are destroyed they do like William Tyndale's supposedly friend, and wait until the smoke has died down to print and publish the same book that William asked him to publish in the first place. My goal is simple; there are stumps in the way. They should have been hued a long time ago, but they have become ornaments. Ornaments are good until their droppings become powerless, and require others to go around them, because they are in the way. After 100's of people past by and say why is that ornament still hanging there, no one has an answer. It has been here since the beginning of time. So the adventuresome person begin a research that takes them all the way back in time, and find out that the ornament is witchcraft, and it has been draining the life out of the native people for years. It gains it strength by the lack of people not caring to know why it exists. It exists because the people have waxed cold, and their new norm seems all right to continue into the future of many generations to come. It will only destroy the power and creativity of the future, and the abilities of the growth and development of the nations to come.

Awesome

Follow your Bliss!! Thanks a bunch 'guru' Derek :)

Everyone said I should get a job, don't get into business. I said no and set up my own company. I succeeded many times. I failed more. I failed but I learned.

I eventually took up a job, to get me the money to start on my own again, soon...

I am not going to stop doing what I want to do because someone tells me to.

Nice words, Derek. True.

I totally agree with you!
We must understand that humans are dynamic creatures with multiple facets to their personality, habits and behaviors.
They are never absolutely introvert or extrovert, or absolutely money driven or socially driven, as we tend to behave on a relative scale.
In addition, like what you said.... Whatever you decide to be your 'measure of success', somebody gonna say you are wrong... as we tend to have different measures...

Carpe diem!!

Your words ring in my head and remind me of the ever so recent downfall I've had. Two months before my supposed graduation as an RN, the instructor failed me. Everything I did was "wrong" to her no matter how much I mastered tasks. I will fight and get my RN, they can say what they want but I'm not backing down! Thanks for the article Derek, it's because of inspirations like you we can continue to press on and add it to our list of why we should! Thanks :)

Derek, I could not have said this any better myself. This is such a true analysis of people in the world that it is scary. Everyone has their own thoughts and opinions of who and what others should be, but because we live in such a diverse world we operate under our own individuality according to the movements of our spirituality and the universe. We can only be who we were destined or designed ourselves to be and not what others perceive we should do or be. If we try to fit into the molds that others have created for us we only end up miserable and out of touch, not just with the world, but most importantly; with ourselves. So, no matter how you try to be "RIGHT" others will always say "YOU ARE WRONG". My take, just be "YOU", the person you are most comfortably being as long as it is not destructive or self defeating. Thanks for such a wonderful post as usual. GOD BLESS.

True. It's never possible to be likable to everyone. However, understanding this and choosing ones own path with courage is a great revelation. Good that you explained it in detail.

This post came at exactly the right time for me. Karma? Thanks, Derek.

Hello Bro. Derek,
First I thank God for your friendship, long after you started CD Baby, and second continuing to try an impact the hearts and minds of people throughout the world. Much of my life I have heard those words; "Preachers don't rap, preachers don't play harmonicas (especially blues, and rock : ). preachers don't act or dance, lol, and my favorite "Ministers don't wear pony tails". Well, I am all of that and more, and my Heavenly Father has never disappointed me in my journey. When a door closes, I know another one has already been opened…thanks for your words of wisdom...

There's always a lot of distracting noise competing for a person's attention when pursuing an idea. It takes mental toughness to overcome obstacles and keep the faith. While reading this I recalled Man's Search for Meaning by Viktor Frankl.

Derek,

Variety in people and their personality types is another example of variety being the spice of life. When I step on the stage I am transformed into an extroverted performer. When I step off the stage I am anxious to resume my usual anonymous status. People are confused by this, but it seems perfectly natural to me and appropriate. The word "society" is a term we use for the set of individuals. Practically speaking, "society" is the set of individuals we encounter in our daily lives. My involvement in music gives me something to offer to society, which I value, and I also value privacy and anonymity. I would be hard-pressed to say which holds more value for me. Thankfully, I don't have to choose between them! Thank you for CDbaby and the generous way you assisted me and other musicians when it was your "baby".

Bob

I am out there much of the time and become surprised when I have an introverted moment.

been following you here for a week now. u been posting real good stuff. keep it on derek. //brobinson

Thank you!

Love this! Thank you for reminding us we are not all the same. This came on a day when I needed it. Thank you for sharing your wisdom and experience.

Hi! Once again I came to your site .. always from different sources. I like you posts and just love it that you share those thoughts with us. Let me know when you are in Duesseldorf, Germany.

Awesome.
As usual.
Keep inspiring.
Keep teaching.
Stay blessed

Great words! Just the kind of stuff I needed to read. Couldn't come at a more better time.

True and agreed, better be loyal to your preferences even if it raises eyebrows and makes you feel far from the others' expectations.
Some of the best initiatives I had were stated to be "wrong" all the way. It pays off to be yourself ;)

Great little article! That's a great viewpoint. If you know what to expect, it's a lot easier to handle what people throw at you!

Good stuff Derek!
One must do , what one desires, if we were to give a who about what every person think of us, and if we always try to please people, we will never be our authentic self.
My saying is:
I am who I am, and there is no one like me, if there was someone like me, I would not be who I am 😉 great post
Maria

as a musician who avoids crowds (and is into charity!) this lesson of yours hits home a hundred times over- well done, Derek! And it's funny how tides can shift, here in the internet age- what was once new quickly becomes static. I'm rarely surprised by which musicians are on Facebook/Twitter/etc... but if I search for a musician and they AREN'T on FB/Twitter/etc.- well, they have my full attention ("WHY are they avoiding social media?"). One of those ironies where a well timed whisper is louder than the storm....

Stereotypes are powerful tools for shaping lives, aren't they?

It takes a lot of strength to go against them - within the world and within yourself.

The fact that you DO see ALL sides of people, issues, and life proves to me that YOU ARE a life time genius of everything around you Derek. Keep taking it in and "translating" to ALL. Some of us ARE at the docks when the plane comes in. And, Some of us actually make it to the air port in a timely fashion to see it land. YOU, my friend, have lived, tasted, experienced enough of life to KNOW and as such, you WILL continue to grow. JAH continue to bless and guide you friend. It IS an honor to consider you as a long distance friend. IRIE (as rege would say) Clair

Haters gonna hate.

To thine own self be true.

Thank you, Derek.

As usual Derek, you are so right-on, and inspiring in all you share in terms of universality!

Your video on Japanese addressing was great. We lived there for three years. However your remarks about streets not having names isn't completely correct. Many streets in Tokyo have names, because Gen. MacArthur insisted on it. Also, many areas in Tokyo have names in addition to numbers, such as ackyiabara which concentrates on electronics ans associated components.

Saw your video on Wimp. Great explanation.

Who cares who says you are wrong?
Who cares about excuses?

I only care about my convictions and actions. I believe in me.

Thanks

sw

Just happenstanced here tonight. There is beauty, art and intelligence everywhere. Amazing world. Thanks Derek.

If there isn't anyone voicing and opinion opposite to yours, then you aren't really making a stand. It is impossible to please everyone and you know you are doing something right if there is someone pissed off at you.

Derek, that is EXACTLY what I have noticed about the people of the world. I fit into many of those molds, myself. I'm not into money, I'm a musician but don't like crowds, and I don't feel I'm wrong about it. I could go on but you already know what I'm talking about.

Don't know how I missed this one, but I love it and agree wholeheartedly.

It's like the ending on eminem's movie "8th Mile", he said what could be said about him and he is ok with it so what's the other guy's problem? Flipping the script!
Very nice read, thanks Derek

Very interesting take, Derek. Biggest take-away: "Then every time they say you’re wrong, that’s a sign you’re doing it right."

Thankyou!

This one and "why are you doing" are so good together and timely for me - people keep telling me to settle down and pick a city to live in and do creative work and I realized I love moving and Iove doing my corporate contract jobs so I will keep being me and being happy - thank you Derek!

It's like you read my mind...

As for knowing you'l be criticized in advance...

I've never forgotten a key note speaker at a student organized conference telling us something I have devoted my life to: "You can be on the cutting edge of change with people taking pot shots at you, or...

I have long forgotten what came after the "or."

You must be an angel , Derek😊.... Your articles are somehow healing !!! Thanks a million , not a billion 😉

Most artists actually have to be disciplined in order to make a living. Even artists like me who don't do it full-time have to consistently carve out time in order to fulfill their creative desires.

Thank you for putting in the hours to organise your thoughts the way you have. Your writing is proving to be helpful during a confusing time.

Can you really be an artist without discipline? :p

Derek and friends, today I muse about perspective.

A commenter above had great respect for Sarah Palin. Maybe in the situation of Alaska she was terrific and appropriate, but people were judging her by White House standards. In other words, like a person sometimes shy and sometimes not, Palin's "being judged" was situational, not dispositional.

Someone mentioned being a "coward" in his own life. Not quite, not unless the word serves you by making you act. My perspective is that you cannot be a coward alone on a desert island. The word is social, a means of social encouragement.

You compliment a cowboy by saying he is "a man to ride (cross with a herd) the river with." If he is too afraid, endangering the cattle drive, then he is called a coward and people won't hire him.

But if the same cowboy, all alone, with no herd, rides out of his way to find an easier ford or a bridge, then he would not need to call himself a coward. Such a motivation word would not be relevant.

By the way, I am timid yet I do socially brave things because of the people I want to associate with. In Kipling's poem, "East is East, and West is West etc." the ending has a an East and a West man being friends because they are both brave. Like my old friends in, say, the reserves and the arts community.